1. “This is the No. 1 selling product on the first floor!”
2. “It’s made on an olive farm in Athens!”
3. “The ‘dark’ shade would be for people of, you know, I guess, ethnic descent?”
4. “This isn’t a powder; it’s a mineral in powder form. So it’s a powder, but it’s not.”
5. “It’s a coral-y, peachy, warm tone, but there’s also brown to it-and beige. Sand … or, a nut? Like a walnut.”
6. “One of my big ‘problem areas’ is around my nose. It’s from blowing my nose about 50,000 times. Since I was 10.”
7. “I like that clean feeling, but I also obviously also like to get the look of perfection.”
-Stephen F. Milioti
For Those Slow Days, When You’re Not Bombing Baghdad Into Kitty Litter:
Al Udeid Air Base in Qatar is the current staging area for a U.S.-led attack on Iraq. The following comes from the official Qatar tourism Web site, http://www.qatar-info.com.
Things to Do in Qatar:
1. Aladdin’s Kingdom: It contains more than 18 rides to suit all ages. In addition, the park has an artificial lagoon, a theatre, a cafeteria and male and female mosques.
2. Television Stations: Qatar television transmits a large mix of programs in both Arabic and English. The Arabic-language channel, Qatar Satellite Station, provides programs that cover local, regional and international affairs. The English-language channel, Second Channel, offers all-English programs and can be received only within Qatar. There are many other options available to the viewer in Qatar, who can use the Qatar Cablevision service. This service retransmits 60 of the most popular satellite-TV channels. The choice of available channels takes into consideration the different preferences of viewers of all ages. Some of the channels are the Orbit group, the ART group, and most Arab satellite channels in addition to English, French, Hindi and Urdu channels.
3. Rick’s Country Kitchen: A simple place to eat. Popular for breakfast and lunch. Opens daily at 5 a.m. Ras Abu Aboud, Telephone: 443-7846.
4. Ponderosa: An American restaurant known for its extensive buffet and steaks. Ponderosa is the place for a quick healthy meal. Ramada Junction, Telephone: 435-5880.
5. Doha Zoo: The zoo is 20 kilometers from Doha along the Salwa road. It has a large and varied collection of animals, reptiles and birds as well as a small amusement park for children.
6. Doha Fort: One of the few remaining military forts in Doha. It was constructed in 1917, on a small hill during the reign of Sheikh Abdalla bin Jassim Al Thani.
To make this drink you’ll need:
One flask filled with spirits of choice
One or more variables (e.g., lemon/orange/lime slice. Not a problem if slightly used)
1. Meet friends (employed, rich, what have you) at bar of choice for drinks.
2. Under table, pour contents of flask into empty glass. The larger the flask, the more Unemployments you’ll be able to make. N.B.: If glassless, water-always free-comes in a glass.
3. “Borrow” ingredients (i.e., splash of appletini, aforementioned lemon slice, last sip of digestif, pineapple chunk, foam from Guinness, celery stick) from other people’s paid-for drinks.
4. Stir well. Sip slowly, savoring the knowledge that not only have you saved eight to 12 dollars, but you’re also sticking it to the misguided scum who in a previous economy began dubbing themselves “mixologists.”
A few notes on the Unemployment: Creativity is key. Sugar packets and coffee sticks liberated from your local Starbucks go a long way. One praiseworthy version: rum from flask, leftover mint leaves from ex-colleague’s mojito, ice, splash of someone’s paid-for beer. (Surprisingly good.) For the less daring, tonic, juice and other innocent beverages can be purchased for considerably less money than their alcoholic counterparts. Techniques such as muddling (maraschino cherries, olives) or twisting (all citrus peels) release the most flavor; it’s all in the wrist.
Five-Day Winter Forecast
Wednesday, Jan. 29
Thursday, Jan. 30
Friday, Jan. 31
Grim . Chance of insane.
Saturday, Feb. 1
Sunday, Feb. 2
53º F. Mild.