This Friday’s brief edition of this not-so-regular feature brings you Blake Zeff, a former Chuck Schumer press guy who is now the prolific spokesman for the New York State Democratic Party.
BENOBSERVER: So I theorized in the paper this week that you’re part of a plot to make John Spencer the GOP Senate nominee. Confess!
ZEFF: yes, and john spencer theorized that we’re part of a plot to make KT McFarland the candidate
ZEFF: so many plots, so little time
ZEFF: what’s a man to do?
BENOBSERVER: you got in a “million little pieces” reference the other day, amid the tide of press releases.
BENOBSERVER: had you actually read the book?
ZEFF: sadly no
ZEFF: the original plan was to release a list of top ten things kt mcfarland did not write
ZEFF: “a million little pieces”
ZEFF: the SNL “lazy sunday” rap
ZEFF: and of course, the “star wars” speech
ZEFF: i think the seinfeld “puffy shirt” episode was in there, as well
BENOBSERVER: did it get vetoed
ZEFF: nah, i had to focus on a john sweeney corruption release and then bill weld flip-flopped again
ZEFF: so i had to get on that
BENOBSERVER: a hard life you have
ZEFF: (i should specify that was rep. john sweeney, not the labor leader)
BENOBSERVER: do you feel that having worked in Chuck Schumer’s press office, you’ve become his clone?
BENOBSERVER: mentally. there’s a theory that young chuck aides become chuck. You, Stu, Josh Isay, all the many others. All body-snatched.
ZEFF: don’t forget rodney
ZEFF: yeah there’s definitely a familial bond all schumer staffers share
ZEFF: i still get mistaken for anthony weiner from time to time