Oh happy day! Somebody pinch us, we’re in reality show heaven … America’s Next Top Model returns (finally!), after what seems like an eternity of VH-1 rerun marathons. Judging from the promos, Tyra is looking scarier than ever—children will run screaming to hurl themselves into the nearest river—and our totally blind pick might be their “plus-size” contestant (who looks to be a healthy size 6). On Top Chef (we haven’t abandoned you), Le Cirque maestro Sirio Maccioni is the guest judge. Anyone else feeling like there’s too much harmony amongst contestants this go-round?
[America’s Next Top Model, CW, 8 p.m.; Top Chef, Bravo, 10 p.m.]