Oasis Lives! If Slightly Wounded

Sometimes people get what they deserve. Let those people be Noel and Liam Gallagher and let them be in a once-glorious, then coke-addled, now doggedly-irrelevant Britpop band called Oasis.
That anyway was our initial reaction to the news yesterday that the band’s performance Sunday night at Toronto’s Virgin Festival was rudely interrupted when some dude—geeking out to the dulcet tones of “Morning Glory”—ran from behind the band and bushwhacked Noel right off the stage. The assailant then lunged at Liam, got smothered in a sea of hired biceps, before finally being dragged away as Liam, barely restrained, tried to punch the guy in the face. The music, of course, stopped, while the confused crowd alternately booed and cheered, and guitar techs scrambled to find Noel’s Gibson. Soon though, as in under five minutes, the band returned—accents intact—to finish the show.

Fine, we thought, a band that’s never shied away from a little vocal or physical abuse over the years got a taste of its own medicine. But no one was hurt—Oasis lives forever.

Now comes word from the band’s website that Noel was taken directly to the hospital after the Toronto performance over concerns that he may have fractured a rib and suffered “ligament damage”—all this from falling on his monitor speakers. And the line-backer now has a name—Daniel Sullivan, age 47. (A little old aren’t we to be bum-rushing rock stars?) No official word yet on the fate of the band’s show tonight at London, Ontario’s John Labatt Centre…

One wonders if this is some cosmic retribution for Noel’s recent jabs at Radiohead—a band who’s gotten their fair share of abuse recently. But not even the guy who wrote Be Here Now deserves a cracked rib.