If you still haven’t decided what to do for New Year’s and you plan on drinking long into the morning, we have a suggestion: The incorrigible Misshapes are hosting a night of serious debauchery at Santos Party House—a new 8,000-square-foot venue on the border between Chinatown and Tribeca. Andrew WK, Gang Gang Dance, Lissy Trullie, Hearts of Darknesses, Bad Brilliance, and Lemonade will be performing live, along with a “mystery surprise guest” of massive proportions. DJs Manderson, Andrew Kuo, Josh Wildman, and Spencer Sweeney spin between sets upstairs, while Invisible Conga People, Mike Simonetti, Eamon Harkin, and James F!@.$%^ Friedman do their thing downstairs. There’ll be a champaigne toast and a 96-second countdown (which, we hear, is entirely “unprecedented.") Plus, cocktails till 8 a.m.! [Tickets on sale now]
Tomorrow night, DFA hosts their Holiday Freakout! at Le Poission Rouge. Predictably, most of the evening’s entertainers draw on the dance music favored by DFA and its stars/founders, LCD Soundsystem—retro house flavored with a touch of NYC punk. All of which is fine by us. Pat Mahoney and James Murphy (both of LCD fame) will be spinning together. Also on hand will be DJs Matt Cash, Juan MacLean, and (we love it) Shit Robot. Invisible Conga People will also squeeze in a live set. [Tickets on sale now]
But really, what better way is there to honor JC’s birthday than an evening spent with the Wu-Tang Clan. Raekwon, RZA, Ghostface, Inspectah Deck, UGOD, Method Man, GZA, Masta Killa, and Cappadonna should all—barring any unforeseen drama—hit the stage at the Hammerstein Ballroom next Tuesday, December 23. In other Wu news, it seems Staten Island historians Robert Wilburn and Charles Tinsley have put together an exhaustive, 450-page study chronicling the rise and fall of the Wu-Tang’s late 20th century dynasty. The Onion has more. [Tickets on sale now]
Of course, you could go to Irving Berlin’s White Christmas or the Radio City Christmas Spectacular, but then how could you look at yourself in the mirror the next morning? Instead, try “Oh, Holy Shit: It’s Christmas!”—the holiday show that dares to dress our Holy Mother in drag. In “Holy Shit”—the third installment of Mimi Imfurst’s infamous Virgin Mary Trilogy—Braden Chapman (that’s her non-drag name) wonders how much it would suck to be a teenager pregnant with God’s child. “Being 13 years old and married off to a carpenter who is 40-something, and all of a sudden God asks her to have his baby; she’s just really freaked out,” Chapman tells the Times. Fortunately, Mary has pop stars like Katy Perry, Fergie, the Pussycat Dolls, and, of course, Madonna, to keep her company. The blasphemy commences this Sunday, December 21 at 7:30 p.m. Don’t bring the kids. [Tickets on sale now]
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