Ivy-ology: Assessing Yale’s Intra-Conference Competition


Location: Providence, Rhode Island


Number of Undergrads: 6,013


Acceptance Rate: 10.8%


Famous Alum: Ted Turner


Vibe: "Performance artists" spending their trust funds on weed.



Location: New York, NY


Number of Undergrads: 7,169


Acceptance Rate: 9.8%


Famous Alum: Barack Obama (transfer student)


Vibe: The coffee-and-cigarette-fueled overachievers blocking your view at the Broken Social Scene concert downtown.


Location: Ithaca, New York


Number of Undergrads: 13,931


Acceptance Rate: 19%


Famous Alum: Thomas Pynchon


Vibe: Manic-depressives and future hotel managers.


Location: Hanover, New Hampshire


Number of Undergrads: 4,100


Acceptance Rate: 12%


Famous Alum: Mindy Kaling


Vibe: Unironic lovers of hiking, in North Face jackets stained with Keystone Light



Location: Cambridge, Massachussets


Number of Undergrads: 7,181


Acceptance Rate: 7%


Famous Alum: Unabomber Ted Kaczynski


Vibe: Superiority complexes who see their bad haircuts as badges of honor.


Location: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania


Number of Undergrads: 10,337


Accetpance Rate: 17.1%


Famous Alum: Tory Burch


Vibe: Popped-collar wearers who are so cheerful that they almost convince us they're not dissapointed about getting wait-listed at Yale.


Location: Princeton, New Jersey


Nunber of Undergrads: 5,047


Acceptance Rate: 9.8%


Famous Alum: David Remnick


Vibe: Kids who know the difference between this season and last season's J.Press catalogs, and will bore you with the details.