Eye Opener: Kelly and Clouseau, The Onion in the Future

Obama will host Netanyahu today. [NPR]

The New York Philharmonic is hiring. [NYT]

Democrats are losing their big Wall Street donors. [WaPo]

And angry financial types have apparently focused their ire on Gillibrand. [Politico]

The Onion releases a 12-minute long video from the future, for sale at the iTunes store. [NYT]

Ray Kelly returns from jaunt in France. [NYP]

New York struggles to recover its public campaign funds. [NYT]

Long Island man with FDNY disabilities pension for diminished lung capacity does triathalons. [NYP]

Surfing show opens across three Manhattan galleries. [WWD]

Sonia Sotomayor spotted “scarfing burgers” in Chelsea. [NYP]