You know, it’s tough being famous. Every day, a bunch of reporters write about me and what I do. They love to say that I “surge” on good days (and I like to read about that), and they love it — love it — when I “plunge.” I can’t blame them; if it bleeds it leads, and all that. But what reporters have a real tough time with is a day like today.
Because, on a day like today, I didn’t do much of anything, direction-wise. I lost 20 points — barely even worth writing about. I’ll let you in on a little secret about days like today. On days like today, I’m just loitering. Like a teenager behind a bowling alley. Like skateboarders at the public library. Like the kids at the comic store who have to be told “This isn’t a library.”
That’s right: I, the Dow, symbol of American enterprise, was just slacking off today. I racked up 2.6 percent last week; I feel like I can coast. And so I am loitering. But you won’t see that headline anywhere.
See you tomorrow,
The Dow Jones Industrial Average