WHAT WE LEARNED: It's the making of a stellar buddy road comedy: James Murphy, mastermind of bleary-eyed disco-punk powerhouse LCD Soundsystem; chef David Chang, who tends the kitchens at the still-hot Momofuku empire; and Aziz Ansari, Parks and Recreation star and reigning funniest man on the planet. Hey, let's send them all to Tokyo and see what happens! But it appears that Aziz and David Chang were like, "Konichiwa, sucker!" to James Murphy, according to the tweet -- they ditched him to grab some grub at Sukiyabashi Jiro, a holy land for sushi fans. David Chang, perhaps full of raw fish and sake, responded to the tweet thusly: "didn't try...we did ditch you!"
THE TWEET: DOES SOMEONE HAVE TO DIE? WHERE IS THE LINE FOR THE DECISION MAKERS, I AM CURIOUS.
WHAT WE LEARNED: Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark injured its fourth castmember this week, and Broadway luminary Alice Ripley is not pleased. She was just one of the stage actors and actresses who called for the cancellation of the $65 million show, but only Alice suggested that someone could "die" before they shut it down. Fighting words!
THE TWEET: in the house: jon corzine!
WHAT WE LEARNED: Around 2:00 p.m. every day, someone at the midtown restaurant Michael's -- famous for catering to the insider set -- hijacks the eatery's Twitter account and rattles off every big wig who's sat down for lunch. It's a giddy spree of transparency, and a bracingly new-school way of deconstructing the idea of the New York Power Lunch. It also tells us quite a lot about these people -- outgoing New Jersey governor Jon Corzine, for example, has enough time to munch on some Waldorf Salad these days, having been ousted from his seat last month. Ah, the spoils of defeat!
THE TWEET (from @originalcjizzle): It was an inside joke between friends. I had no intention of things turning out this way
WHAT WE LEARNED: We learned that Morgan Freeman is still alive. For some reason, Twitter is intent on killing him -- even the smallest practical joke (started by a guy with only 1500 followers) can snowball into a full-fledged rumor. But remember, kids, just because it's tweeted doesn't mean it's true.
THE TWEET: I'll thus unblock all blocks, wish you all a Merry Christmas and I'll suspend this account until/if this frenzy is stopped.
WHAT WE LEARNED: All the uproar over his comments on Wikileaks founder Julian Assange broke Keith Olbermann late last week, so much so that he vowed to stay off Twitter. Of course that didn't happen! Nice try, though, Keith.