What Twitter Taught Us: Snooki’s Going Down With the Dropping Ball

THE TWEET: Big Shout to YOU!! ALL THE ARTISTS involved!!! And STEWIE RAH!!! Together we raised $1M to fight AIDS and SAVE REAL LIVES!!!!!!

WHAT WE LEARNED: Raising $1 million for Keep A Child Alive proved more difficult than expected, keeping Alicia Keys and her clan off Twitter for nearly a week. Then the tweets miraculously came back! What happened, you ask? Well, billionaire Stewart Rahr—or Stewie Rah Rah, King of Fun—contributed half the necessary funds all by himself. So much for mass activism.

THE TWEET: When I go out, Kathy who cuts my hair has given me a spray, but I don't know the name of it.

WHAT WE LEARNED: In a wonderfully Lynch-being-Lynch experiment, the wacked-out film genius agreed to participate in a odd type of interview Wednesday. Fans would tweet with the hashtag #lynchqa, The Guardian's music Twitter would pick the best ones, and then Lynch would answer them on his Twitter. The result is a feed of answers presented without context; they make for perfect little dry Lynchian moments. Here's David Lynch answering what must of been a question about how to get that David Lynch hairdo. Lots of spray apparently.

THE TWEET: John Lennon: The Teamaker, by Yoko Ono Lennon. Please share your memories of John here: love, yoko

WHAT WE LEARNED: Today marks the 30th anniversary of John Lennon's death. Too bad "Lenon" is trending on Twitter instead of "Lennon." After giving peace a chance, Lennon fans, what about giving spelling a chance.

THE TWEET: EVERY attack now made on Assange and @ was made against me and release of Pentagon Papers

WHAT WE LEARNED: Pentagon Papers leaker Daniel Ellsberg has found a kindred spirit in Julian Assange, embattled Wikileaks founder. Also: Daniel Ellsberg on Twitter! Though the account is run by his son, so not quite.

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THE TWEET: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no: Why the Mars Bar is closing and likely moving Via @

WHAT WE LEARNED: Neighborhood blogger EV Grieve mourned Mars Bar, the crusty old bar that's been doing God's work and polluting Second Ave. for seemingly forever. Rightfully so: there's barely any East Village at all with Mars Bar gone. But they'll probably put a John Varvatos or something in it so we can look forward to that!

THE TWEET: To be clear, I love me some @ and Lil Wayne, and I am so glad that he is free.

WHAT WE LEARNED: Happy birthday Nicki! The wig-wearing rapper, feminist icon, and slick-tongued paragon of dexterity turns 26 today. Naturally Cornel West, Princeton profeessor and brand name academic, gives her some #love. What was that you said you wanted, Nicki? A Tonka the color of Willy Wonka? You got it!

THE TWEET: Sucha good mood today ! Workin hard and hopefully it'll pay off :)

WHAT WE LEARNED: This New Year's Eve, Snooki will be in the ball when it drops in Times Square. If that doesn't start 2011 off on the right foot, I don't know what can. This is obviously putting Snookers in a good mood. Our mood's on the up, too.

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