The Eight-Day Week: April 27-May4

sjparker2 getty The Eight Day Week: April 27 May4Wednesday, April 27
Canapés Below Canal
Petula Clark would surely approve of the Downtown Dinner, a star-studded benefit for the Lower Manhattan Cultural Council tonight at Cipriani’s Wall Street outpost. Dancers, musicians and comedians-including Laurie Anderson, Bill T. Jones, Whoopi Goldberg and Branford Marsalis, all slated to perform during the evening’s festivities-will venture bravely into a neighborhood known largely for its Armani suits, apoplectic day traders and criminal lack of decent grocery stores to honor American Express and the Joyce Theater with the LMCC’s “Liberty Award.” Tony winner Bill Irwin will emcee the gala, and with all of that Broadway talent, it’s highly probable that, as Ms. Clark once posited, you’ll be dancing with them too before the night is over, happy again. (Sorry, we couldn’t resist.)
Cipriani, 55 Wall Street, 6 p.m.,
call
212-219-9401 to purchase
tabl
es or tickets.

Thursday, April 28,
That’s a Wrap!

Who knows when Project Runway will come back, but it’s always nice to see Tim Gunn out and about-and in black tie, no less!-rubbing elbows with (and, hopefully, collecting gossip on) the fashion elite. This week he serves as an honorary chair for the Municipal Art Society of New York’s gala celebrating Our Lady of the Wrap Dress, Diane von Furstenberg, who will receive the 2011 Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis Medal for her community efforts in the meatpacking district. Caroline Kennedy, Agnes Gund and Kitty Hawks are among the well-heeled co-chairs.
The New York Public Library, Fifth Avenue and 42nd Street, cocktails at 7 p.m., dinner at
8 p.m., call the JFM Group at
212-921-9070 for tickets.

Friday, April 29
Wills You Marry Me?
Our invitation must have gotten lost in the air mail, but we think there’s some sort of big-deal wedding going on today-so superlative in its pomp and excess that it’s a shoo-in for The Times‘ Vows section. At 11 a.m. London time, before most of us in New York have completed our REM cycles, Prince William of Wales will finally marry Kate Middleton, putting an end to nearly a decade of exploitative tabloid stories. (Don’t worry, though, the OK! editors still have hundreds of “Baby Joy!” covers to plan.) There is absolutely no reason to get up at 5 a.m. in the DVR age, so resist the urge to live history in real time. (And for heaven’s sake, spare yourself the indignity of donning a silly hat in public, which seems to be a prerequisite for attending any of the city’s public events.) Instead, once you’ve fast-forwarded through the tiresome footage of mounted regiments and tiny, gloved hands doing Miss America waves from horse-drawn carriages, we suggest gussying up and stopping by the Cabinet magazine benefit cocktail party in Brooklyn (we know, we know, but it’s not exactly a flight to London, now, is it?), which will include cocktails, games, street-cart-inspired food (a welcome departure from the benefit circuit’s traditional dry chicken or artful towers of indistinguishable root vegetables) and a performance by Bored to Death creator Jonathan Ames.

The Green Building, 450 Union Street,
8 p.m., call 718-222-8434 for tickets.

Saturday, April 30
The King of Pong
Do you have anything better to do this weekend than watch a dentally challenged bartender goad Susan Sarandon into a high-stakes Ping-Pong tournament? We didn’t think so. Jamie Mandel, a barkeep at Red Hook’s Bar B61, is putting the paddle to the metal for 15 hours straight in an attempt to finally raise money to replace nine teeth that were knocked out in a 1995 car crash (he was, tragically,  driving home from a Doobie Brothers-Steve Miller Band concert when a drunk driver hit him). How does the toothsome Ms. Sarandon figure into this? In a video posted online April 20, Mr. Mandel pleaded with the actress-cum-Ping-Pong mogul to show her support by playing a few games with him. “I really, really need teeth,” he said. “I dare you!”
187 Columbia Street
,
1 p.m. to 4 a.m.

Sunday, May 1
U.S.S.R&B
It’s Moscow on the Hudson this weekend when, as part of PEN American Center’s weeklong World Voices festival, Gary Kasparov, the champion chess player, who’s more recently taken up journalism, speaks on contemporary Russian politics and culture at the Morgan Library. A panel discussion with writers Vladmir Sorokin, Jamey Gambrell and Fedor Svarovskiy will follow. Bring your Tolstoy beard! In the interest of complete immersion, you should probably stop by Pravda for some vodka and a zakouski platter afterward-or, if you want to celebrate triumph over hardship in a less tweedy, more high-decibel way, head over to the Hammerstein Ballroom, where Mary J. Blige, Christina Aguilera and other glam Grammy types will headline MJB da MVP’s second annual benefit concert celebrating the singer’s Foundation for the Advancement of Women Now 2011 scholarship recipients. Elle editor Robbie Myers will cohost.
The Morgan Library & Museum, Lehrman Hall, 225 Madison Ave., 4:30 p.m., go to ovationtix.com for tickets; Mary J. Blige FFAWN concert, Hammerstein Ballroom, 311 West 34th Street, 8 p.m., private event.

Monday, May 2
Window Dressing
Flowers blooming, temperatures rising, Vogue assistants shaking in their Lanvin d’Orsay pumps-it must be spring, which means that it’s also time for the annual Met Costume Institute Ball, otherwise known as the fashion industry’s prom. (There’s even a theme!) This year, the event is tied to the unveiling of the Met’s long-anticipated “Alexander McQueen: Savage Beauty” exhibit, which will open to the public on May 4. Attendees aren’t required to wear McQueen (except maybe Vogue girls, whose wardrobes are hand-picked by Anna herself), but expect to see many of the late designer’s dramatic, darkly romantic gowns gracing the red carpet. Daphne Guinness, McQueen’s friend and muse, will not only be wearing one of his creations but will dress for the gala in the window at the Barneys flagship store on Madison Avenue. The brewski heiress is offering herself up to midtown voyeurs as part of “Fashion as Art,” a Barneys exhibit that coincides with the Met’s McQueen show. Over six weeks, the dapper department store will display selections from Ms. Guinness’ expensive and eccentric closet, including some choice chapeaux that once belonged to Isabella Blow.
Met Ball, the Metropolitan Museum
of Art, arrivals at TK p.m., private event; Fashion As Art, Barneys New York,
660 Madison Avenue, afternoon,
go to barneys.com for details.

Tuesday, May 3
Not So Jong-Fast!
VIPs beware: The book party for Molly Jong-Fast’s The Social Climbers Handbook is sure to be besieged by randos and plebes trying to climb their way in. If you’re attending this private affair, hosted by Isaac Mizrahi and art adviser Sharon Coplain Hurowitz, watch out for social hangers-on attempting to bribe the bouncer, pulling a Bueller (remember Abe Froman, sausage king of Chicago?) or walking around with shaved eyebrows and an orange pageboy wig trying to pass for Lynn Yaeger. We’re sure security will be on hand, though, so try to enjoy your Champagne while feting Ms. Jong-Fast and her latest heroine, a fallen socialite who literally kills to get back on top.
Isaac Mizrahi, 23 East 67th Street,
6:30 p.m., private event.

Wednesday, May 4
Cary On
We remember her as Celeste Lundy, Steve Sanders’ flash-happy college sweetheart on the original Beverly Hills, 90210, but Jennifer Grant has an even bigger claim to fame (as hard as that may be to believe). Not only is she the daughter of Cary Grant and Dyan Cannon, she’s about to become a published author with Good Stuff, a memoir (out May 3, from Knopf) about her relationship with her famous dad that takes its title from one of his favorite expressions. Will we finally learn the truth about Cary and his “roommate” Randolph Scott? Or why Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House has been so criminally overlooked? Find out tonight when Ms. Grant reads from her book at the Upper East Side Barnes & Noble.
Barnes and Noble, 150 East 86th Street, 7 p.m.