Sean Avery Golfs With You in the Eight-Day Week

Sean Avery

Sean Avery

Wednesday, June 22

Foxy Ladies

Opera—it’s not just for opera houses anymore! We had enough to keep up with between the Met and the City Opera (O.K., we mainly kept up with the Met), but more and more, we’re hearing of opera performances put on by orchestras (the skill set’s not too different, one supposes …). The New York Philharmonic today begins its run of The Cunning Little Vixen, an opera by the Czech composer Leoš Janáček about the life of that Playmate who almost married Hugh Hefner last week. Not really—it’s based on an old-timey comic strip and tells the adventures of a lady fox out in the woods. It’s all very children’s TV, between a set strewn with giant sunflowers and the Cats-y costumes. And we’ll take those singing mosquitoes over the stinging kind any day.
Avery Fisher Hall, 10 Lincoln Center Plaza, performances daily through June 25, tonight’s curtain at 7:30 p.m.; visit nyphil.org for tickets and information.

Thursday, June 23

Slow Boat to China

Talk about a cultural revolution—Shen Yun Performing Arts, a troupe devoted to preserving traditional Chinese art forms (tagline: “five thousand years in the making”), is coming to Lincoln Center. Donna Karan’s Urban Zen initiative (om) is presenting a private premiere party inside the Koch Theater with the likes of socialite Anne Bass, Velvet Undergrounder Lou Reed and pajama aficionado Julian Schnabel. Now that Anna Wintour’s been to China—trailing Richard Nixon by just a few decades—we feel suddenly trendy indulging a taste for traditional dance and music, while simultaneously sticking it to the commies. Ni hao!

David H. Koch Theater, 20 Lincoln Center Plaza, performance at 7 p.m., reception at 9 p.m.;  private event.

Friday, June 24

Sorority Girls

College! Who doesn’t miss the days when we could alternate fancy little cotillions and nights in the stickiest-floored fraternity houses without any guilt? (These days, sad to say, it’s all cotillions.) A ball in Brooklyn’s Grand Prospect Hall hosted by Alpha Kappa Alpha, the oldest African American Greek sorority around, invites us to go back to school—without those pesky final exams. The gala benefits the Ivy Rose Foundation, which supports Brooklyn schools. These sorority ladies take themes seriously, too: the “Pink and Green Ball”—so preppy!—encourages its guests to don 1920’s-style garb, and guests will enjoy live music and casino games. Grand

Prospect Hall, 263 Prospect Avenue, 8 p.m.; visit pinkandgreenball.org for tickets and information.

Saturday, June 25

Ball Versus Ball

It’s a battle of the blowouts in the Hamptons, as the 15th annual Heart of the Hamptons Ball faces off against the 16th annual Artists Against Abuse Gala (a year more venerable, but who’s counting?). The Heart of the Hamptons Ball benefits the American Heart Association, while Artists Against Abuse helps fund the Retreat, a domestic violence services group. Worthy causes both! Here’s where they diverge—the Heart of the Hamptons Ball is a generic, if lovely, affair, with cocktails and dancing, at the Hayground School. The Artists Against Abuse Gala is at a school as well, the Ross School—but in a feat of group imagination, and nautical decor, the crowd is asked to pretend they’re on a “luxurious yacht.” That would seem to give the edge to Artists Against Abuse, but the Heart of the Hamptons has a trump card: honoree Star Jones. How ever will we choose?!

Heart of the Hamptons Ball, Hayground School, 151 Mitchells Lane (Bridgehampton), 6 p.m., call (631) 734-2804 for tickets and information; Artists Against Abuse Gala, Ross School Lower Campus Field House, 739 Butter Lane (Bridgehampton), 6 p.m.; call (631) 329-4398 for tickets and information.

Sunday, June 26

Animal Husbandry

Today brings the final performance of the New York Classical Theatre’s production of Molière’s comedy of gender relations School for Husbands in Central Park. This isn’t a Shakespeare in the Park–style seated experience, no sir—attendees have to follow the actors on a ramble through paths and over bridges. And we thought keeping up with Molière’s verse was challenging enough! … Meanwhile, the West Village gastropub the Spotted Pig throws a party for gay pride. We’re trying to fit into our swimsuit, so no pork shoulder for us—but we will indulge in a few drinks. The parade ends in the West Village, so it’s a quick stroll over, a distance of about five leather-clad bikers.

New York Classical Theatre, Central Park at West 103rd Street and Central Park West, performance begins at 7 p.m., free and open to the public, visit newyorkclassical.org for information. The Spotted Pig, 314 West 11th Street; visit thespottedpig.com for information.

Monday, June 27

Smooth Like Putter

For those whose work schedules don’t demand complete adherence to fuddy-duddy, old “five-day weeks”—or those who have forsworn work for leisure altogether!—there’s a golf tournament in the Hamptons today that’s really calling your name. It’s the Hamptons Golf Classic! Beachfront impresario Zev Norotsky founded the tournament, which pairs celebrities with the well-heeled and sends them out to tee off on one another! We’re hoping to get placed in a foursome with New York Ranger Sean Avery—though we’d settle for Landry Fields of the Knicks. Why do athletes want to ruin their Hamptons weekends with sports during the off-season? Never mind—it’s just golf!

Hampton Hills Golf and Country Club, County Road 31 (Westhampton), arrivals at 10 a.m., shotgun start at 11 a.m., cocktails upon conclusion at 4:30pm, call (917) 232-2355 for information.

Tuesday, June 28

Rabbit Season

The Sanctuary Hotel’s in a “soft opening” phase—why does everything have to take so long! But in the meantime, Patrick McMullan is throwing a little shindig there, along with kooky South African graffiti artist David Foox, both of whom are contributing work on the theme “The Year of the Rabbit.” And here we thought it was the year of the dirty dog (yes, Rep. Weiner, we’re still talking about you). … By the way, we’re still so embarrassed for Brooke Shields after she compounded a minute-long line flub at the Tonys with an apology that had to be censored for profanity. (That never happened on Suddenly Susan!) Moving forward! The actress is set to take the lead role from Bebe Neuwirth in The Addams Family, that mysteriously unkillable Broadway show. Now that Spider-Man appears to have become a model of safety, Ms. Shields’s star turn is the riskiest, most daring ticket in town!

The Year of the Rabbit reception, Sanctuary Hotel, 132 West 47th Street, 6 p.m., cocktails and hors d’oeuvres served; private event. The Addams Family, Lunt-Fontanne Theatre, 205 West 46th Street, curtain at 7 p.m.; visit theaddamsfamilymusical.com or the box office for tickets and information.

Wednesday, June 29

Summer Loving

This summer, we’re hoping for a fling—a bit of romance to break up the humid, nasty dog days of summer. The uniquely capitalized gallery fordPROJECT allows us to live vicariously with the exhibit Summer Affair, commencing today. The group show features works by the photographer Manuela Paz and light artist Virginia Overton, among others, but the overarching narrative of the show is more striking (or seasonally appropriate) than any of the art. One is meant to imagine oneself in an apartment shared by two collectors who are carrying on an affair—that the whole thing takes place in an actual West Side penthouse is all the better (though we’re not sure how fordPROJECT can verify its claim that the apartment was once owned by real-life “passionate and tragic lovers”—aren’t they all passionate and tragic in this town?).

fordPROJECT, 57 West 57th Street, floors 19 and 20, opens today, from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.; visit fordproject.com for information.