The Eight-Day Week: July 6-13

Alec Baldwin (Getty Images)

Alec Baldwin (Getty Images)

Wednesday, July 6

Curb Appeal

Larry David’s Curb Your Enthusiasm may be our favorite fish-out-of-water tale ever, and one of the main reasons we still subscribe to HBO (that and True Blood). It’s like seven seasons of that scene in Annie Hall where Alvy Singer goes out west and tries coke. (Ah-choo!) Now the fish has flopped back into the water: the show’s returning to New York for its new season commencing Sunday (we hear one episode will have Larry dropping by a Palestinian restaurant—Oy!), and tonight, HBO celebrates Larry and the gang with a red-carpet premiere in midtown. We’re going to try to get Susie Essman to curse us out or, failing that, convince her to curse out fellow attendees Dan Abrams (hey, bro!) or Bryant Gumbel … Meanwhile, the city’s celebutantes, music makers and music machers are at the Intrepid (strap on those sea legs!) for the so-called final birthday party for DJ Cassidy. He’s turning 30 and giving up his annual bashes—not like we haven’t heard that before. Past events have drawn music exec Lyor Cohen, nightlife king Paul Sevigny and the ubiquitous Russell Simmons, and the birthday boy tends to don a brightly colored suit for the occasion. Our sources won’t reveal the big name doing the surprise performance, but attendees are in for a treat—two years ago it was Bobby Brown! (Ah-choo!)

Curb Your Enthusiasm premiere, Time Warner Screening Room, 1 Time Warner Center, 6:15 p.m. arrivals, 7 p.m. screening, private event; DJ Cassidy birthday party, Pier 86, West 46th Street and 12th Avenue, private event.

Thursday, July 7

Sand Art

Talk about bringing the mountain to Mohammed! Every year, scads of galleries from the U.S. and abroad haul their finest wares to the Hamptons to display them to potential buyers—because, really, we don’t intend to spend the summer sweltering in Chelsea. For anyone who thinks beachfront galleries are all about sea-glass mobiles and those paintings of dogs on sand dunes, the photoHamptons exhibit, featuring Annie Leibovitz’s and Chuck Close’s portraits of Kate Moss, will be a welcome surprise. (We’re buying a few to celebrate Ms. Moss’s wedding, the only royal British wedding we care about.) The opening preview party for the artHamptons fair is held tonight inside a modular, air-conditioned building constructed just for the occasion in the middle of a Bridgehampton park—if the weather’s chilly, pretend you’re in Basel! If it’s warm, pretend you’re at Art Basel in Miami!

Sayre Park, 154 Snake Hollow Road (Bridgehampton), opening party tonight from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. to benefit LongHouse Reserve, show runs through July 10; visit arthamptons.com for tickets and complete schedule.

Friday, July 8

Going Ape

The movies this summer—so uninspiring. All the extra-extra-buttered popcorn in the world can’t tempt us to roll up to a multiplex these days. The Tree of Life? We can nap at home, thank you, and our dreams would be much more interesting. Transformers? We like robots only when they’re making us coffee and vacuuming our rugs and anchoring our talk shows (yes, Andy Cohen, we’re on to you). Today, though, brings the release of Project Nim, a documentary about a chimp adopted by humans to teach it to communicate through language. It’s a sad tale—believe it or not, apes don’t quite mesh with humans as easily as you’d think! (Not as easily as robots—and by the way, Keurig, make us another.) But we’d rather learn this valuable lesson via a thoughtful doc than by enduring the new Planet of the Apes movie later this summer. (James Franco, what have they done to you?)

Project Nim opens today.

Saturday, July 9

Cold Comfort Farm

Philosophical question: If leaving the city means attending the same old parties in a new location, shrouded by a white tent instead of the Cipriani ceiling, did you ever leave at all? Oh, never mind, have a rosé! We’ll see all those familiar, tight faces out in Sagaponack tonight as society mainstay Peter Davis, luxuriously eyebrowed model Hilary Rhoda and Harper’s Bazaar-o Mary Alice Stephenson host a party for Love Heals, a charity that provides anti-H.I.V. education to the New York City youth. It’s held at a private horse farm, so if you “love heels,” you may want to stick close to the tent to avoid stepping in a little piece of nature.

Luna Farm, 276 Parsonage Lane (Sagaponack), 7:30 p.m.; visit loveheals.org/luna for tickets and information.

Sunday, July 10

God Only Knows

We saw all the art we’d ever need to see (and some Leibovitz photos) at the artHamptons tent, so we’re not clamoring to visit the galleries at MoMA until Rothko invades in September. But we could be persuaded for a musical performance. Tonight, the New Juilliard Ensemble presents a passel of premieres, including that of Conrad Cummings’s musical meditation on the Beach Boys, I Wish They All Could Be … (Not exactly Handel, we know, but this is the same gotta-stay-with-the-times MoMA that hosted Kanye West this year.) It’s a bit cruelly ironic to play the Beach Boys for a crowd trapped in the city, but who cares? We’re dusting off our theremin!

Museum of Modern Art, 11 West 53rd Street, Abby Aldrich Rockefeller Sculpture Garden opens at 7 p.m., concerts begin at 8 p.m., free with first-come, first-served seating; visit moma.org for information.

Monday, July 11

Ballets Russes

The opera season may have wound down—see you in September, when we’ll all be grasping for the Ring!—but the Metropolitan Opera House may as well be put to some use. Tonight, Russia’s Mariinsky Ballet takes up occupancy for a performance of Anna Karenina. You’ll never want to take a train again. And honey, you won’t have to: the dinner with the dancers is right there, at the Mandarin Oriental on Columbus Circle! Arts patrons like Alec Baldwin (whose new Woody Allen film is scheduled to begin shooting today—don’t let us keep you!), Arianna Huffington, Scott Pelley (have you seen his new CBS Evening News? Neither have we!) and the noted ballet aficionado Darren Aronofsky, director of that en pointe potboiler Black Swan, will be in attendance. If any of the dancers turns into a giant bird (spoiler!), Mr. Aronofsky’s on the case.

Performance at 8 p.m., Metropolitan Opera House, Lincoln Center, dinner at 10 p.m., Mandarin Oriental Hotel, 80 Columbus Circle, dancers to arrive for after-party at 11:15 p.m.; call (203) 298-4722 or email events@wnfa.org for tickets and information.

Tuesday, July 12

What, the Frick?

We’ll be huddled in the Frick Collection’s Garden Court at the first sign of rain tonight—the annual Summer Soirée (not to be confused with tonight’s Project Lipstick Sunset Soirée at Hudson Terrace—we get it, party planners: you were all thwarted French lit majors!). The party is to be divided between the indoor Garden Court (for those who like their air conditioned) and the 70th Street Garden (for those who love fresh air, or, also, smoking! That’s allowed, right?). The evening’s chairs include a Frick herself—Emily T. Frick, in fact!—Oxford-educated interior designer Clare McKeon and glamourpuss young lawyer Lucy Jane Lang.

The Frick Collection, 1 East 70th Street, 6:30 p.m.; visit shopfrick.org/support for tickets and information.

Wednesday, July 13

Moon Landing

Is there any author this side of Shakespeare or Stan Lee whose work has been so consistently screen-adapted as that of young Ben Mezrich? The author wrote the book on the dueling egos behind Facebook, which became The Social Network (a classic case of the movie eclipsing the book!), and his Bringing Down the House, about poker-playing geniuses, became 21 (a classic case of a Kevin Spacey movie disappearing forever!). We can’t wait for the film adaptation of Sex on the Moon, Mr. Mezrich’s newest tale of youth ambition gone wrong. Hell, we might even read this one, which chronicles a NASA intern’s quest to steal moon rocks from the agency’s vault. Today, Mr. Mezrich holds a conversation at Bryant Park’s “Word for Word Author” series with author A.J. Jacobs about the book; we’ll be there to ask whether Mr. Mezrich’s next yarn about ambition and striving will be a memoir!

Bryant Park Reading Room, 42nd Street side of Bryant Park, 12:30 p.m.; call (212) 768-4242 for information. Rain location at Library of the General Society of Mechanics and Tradesmen, 20 West 44th Street.

ddaddario@observer.com :: @DPD_