The New York Times Muses on August, the Ineffable Month

Here is The New York Times‘ take on August as a month of leisure:

1. Augusts of yore were more calm than Augusts now: “The days were torpid, and, at night, a martini moon hung in a seersucker sky.” Is a “seersucker sky” some old-timey expression? Because such a sky might actually be a symptom of an airborne toxic event. Is that what they mean on the radio in the morning when they talk about “air quality alerts”?

2. But wait, maybe August was never really as slow as any other time of year: “But, perhaps, that’s the way New Yorkers felt in past decades, too, that life was rushing by and August was powerless to stop it.” August has not stopped our lives, sadly.

3. Oh well, your shrink will be able to tell you about August when she gets back from vacation in September: “When the shrinks return at last, one can ask if there’s a trick to slowing this present down.”

4. We would like a martini, no moon please, seersucker sky or the fact that it’s 10:03 a.m. be damned.

5. This editorial might be the only evidence needed that at least somebody at the Times has gone on vacation.