Reading Between the Lines: 'New York Post' Supports Message of Occupy Wall Street

Still hates the tambourines though

'New York Post': Secret 99%-ers?

You might read this morning’s editorial in the New York Post, Time to throw the bums out,” as a knock on the Occupy Wall Street protests. After all, so far the paper has been pretty negative about the whole Zuccotti Park scene, calling it a drug-laden, hippie den that is a breeding ground for sexual malarkey and criminal activity. But it turns out the Post is quite sympathetic to the cause…if you read between the lines.

Let’s start at the beginning:

What began as a credible protest against bank bailouts, crony capitalism and the like has, in large measure, been hijacked by crazies and criminals.

“You hear that Walter? The paper hear is saying that those damn kids on Wall Street had a credible protest going!”
“I said, the paper says Occupy Wall Street was a credible protest!”
“Come into the kitchen, Walter!”
“What about a protest?”

Oh, and then comes a more overarching endorsement:

No one has greater respect for the First Amendment than this paper. Even radicals–especially radicals–have a fundamental right to public protest.

“Walter! Come quickly! The Post is supporting the First Amendment again!”
“Alice, I swear to God if I have to come into the kitchen for no reason…”
“No it’s really cute this time, I promise. Come quickly…shhh! Be quiet! You don’t want to startle it.”

We don’t even quibble with some parts of the protesters’ message–such as their resentment of the massive bailouts of banks using taxpayer money.

“Walter, do you hear that? Not one quibble!”
“Alice, what the hell are you saying? Come into the living room if you want to talk!”
“I’m saying the Post doesn’t even have one quibble with protesting massive bank bailouts!”
“Goddamn hippies.”

Of course, then the Post shows its hand by listing all the reasons Mayor Bloomberg and Bloomfield owners are “too scared” to throw out the protesters:

The drumming and tambourines.
The yelling and screaming.
The public urination and defecation.
The drugs.
The lewdness.
The criminals and their crimes.

The tambourines!! The public defecation! Criminals and their crimes! Holy rotten liberals, Batman! The editorial ends with a reasonable, “Bloomberg needs to instruct the NYPD to clean the mess up.”

Man, totally! If only Mayor Bloomberg would tell the NYPD to get on this Occupy Wall Street thing already!
Reading Between the Lines: 'New York Post' Supports Message of Occupy Wall Street