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It’s that special time of the year again, when Fifth Avenue is set a’twinkling with displays of opulent spending and every magazine advertisement beckons you to think not of yourself for once when engaging in egregious spending.

But gift giving can be hard! Especially, as they say, for the person in your life who has everything…though they never tell you how difficult it can be to shop for the person who has nothing.

What kind of stocking stuffer are you supposed to get your loved ones who are currently occupying Wall Street? Do they just want a card with some money in it, or is that offensive? Should you buy them something utilitarian to wear in the cold, or just send them a plane ticket home? And where are you supposed to send your gifts to, anyway? Care of Liberty Plaza, the local NYPD precinct, or the North Pole? (We hear the elves are picketing outside Santa’s factory because of the union lockout, so postal service might be iffy.)

We’ve spent months trying to decipher what exactly the Occupiers want. And while you may not be able to re-haul our entire  system of government or end Fracking once and for all–you’d have to find out what it is first–we’ve come up with a list of 15 treats that are sure to please even the most picky protester this holiday season.