Jehovah’s Witnesses Raking In Real Estate Dough

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165 Columbia Heights

Whether it’s Armageddon or soaring property values, the Jehovah’s Witnesses have decided to get the hell out of Brooklyn, and they are one property closer to cutting all Earthly ties to their home of a century. An adorable carriage house at 165 Columbia Heights was sold for $4.1 million, city records show.

In their listing, Corcoran agents Ellen Newman and Lisa Detwiler choose their words carefully, not over-advertising the home’s provenance. “165 Columbia Heights is an example of the premier addresses of the Watchtower’s real estate holdings,” they write, referring to the group’s official name “The Watchtower Bible and Tract Society.” Jehovah may be almighty but evoking His name doesn’t help on the real estate front.

The home features an enviable 4,172-square-foot layout with four bedrooms and four full baths. A gluttonous master bedroom includes a walk-in-closet and en-suite bath, while the vainglorious garage can hold four cars. The Witnesses were definitely not guilty of acedia (look it up), as the home has all new mechanicals.

The Jehovah’s Witnesses, whose world headquarters have been located in Brooklyn Heights for over a century, are moving upstate to the town of Warwick. The group is in the process of selling property in the area worth between $600 million and $1 billion.

The buyers, George and Anita Feiger hail from San Francisco, where, according to the deed, they live in the Buena Vista terrace adjacent to Haight Street.