Chalk this up to one of the weirder fan fictions we’ve read: The Gloss‘ Jamie Peck, who is currently in Berlin, just found out that Luka Rocco Magnotta was discovered in an Internet cafe in the Neukoelln district, several blocks away from the where the blogger is staying. Since she’s been traveling Europe for several weeks and only intermittently has access to the ‘net, she’s both missed the entire “Gay Porn Star Cannibal” saga, and happened to be searching for an Internet cafe on the same several blocks where Mr. Magnotta was found, checking the news for references to himself.
Ms. Peck’s horrific revelation–that an accused cannibal was skulking around her neighborhood--quickly turned into a titillating fantasy friendship:
…I probably would have asked him where he got that cute Mickey Mouse shirt or how he gets his hair so James Dean-like. Maybe, if we’d hit it off, I would also have asked him where to go clubbing and/or buy ecstasy, because I’m new in town and need to make friends, and I know not all gay guys are into that stuff but look at his pictures.
Had he responded positively to my friend-vances, I would almost definitely have invited him up for a drink, because I just bought a bunch of cheap German beer and am a terrible judge of character. And then he would have murdered me and sent my body parts to Barack Obama and Mitt Romney, probably.
Luckily (or unluckily) for Ms. Peck, she never had the chance to meet Mr. Magnotta, and therefore is both alive and sans a good story to sell to The Post. Oh well, she can still make a cute photo gallery of his best faces!