Holding Court

144054784 Holding Court

Lady Gaga. (Kazuhiro Nogi/GettyImages)

Summer should be a time of fun in the sun, but several big time New Yorkers will be cultivating a paler pallor as they spend their beach months sitting in the courtroom. Ex-supermodel Christie Brinkley and architect Peter Cook have spent so much time duking it out in front of judges and in the pages of The New York Post that the former Hamptons It couple have been ordered not to speak to each other … ever again. (Which actually seems just fine by them.) They’ll have to hand their kids off through a parenting coordinator, since the vitriolic duo have spent two years accusing each other of missing child-support payments, lax scheduling for pick-ups and drop-offs, and all around bad parenting. We can’t say we disagree with the decision.

Lady Gaga, no stranger to lawsuits herself—she’s sued a French ice-cream company for a breast-milk frozen concoction called Baby Gaga, among others—is now prepping for the September release of her new perfume, Fame, by claiming that an Albany cosmetics company doesn’t deserve to sit on her namesake. The only problem? Zela International Co.’s brand of Gaga Pure Platinum makeup trademarked their name back in the early aughts, long before Stefani Germanotta became the queen of the little monsters.

And then there’s the bearish Alec Baldwin, who will be spending a lot of time in civil court, thanks to his one-two (grab-and-possible-punch) of a New York Daily News photographer. If that wasn’t bad enough, he then ran his bike over the foot of an Inside Edition reporter, knocked two journalists with his handlebars and sped off down the sidewalk—only to slam into former Prez Bill Clinton. At least he apologized for that one.

But there’s one courtroom notice we know Mr. Baldwin showed up for: his acquisition of his marriage certificate to Hilaria Thomas, the yoga instructor who, according to sources, has the 30 Rock actor on a strict diet to lose 30 pounds. Well, that would make us cranky, too.