Oh, teenagers. Aren’t they just the worst? One minute they’re throwing an illegal house party inside the vacated California mansion of former Ukrainian Prime Minister Pavlo Lazarenko–who is currently in prison for hiding millions of dollars in American banks–and the next, they’re running off with your $30,000 Picasso lithograph. Wait. Hang on a second. These teenagers sound kind of awesome.
On May 27 in Marin County, Calif., a group of about 100 teenagers threw a house party in the mansion where Lazarenko had stayed as he awaited processing on a political asylum request before he was jailed for money laundering. The police were called but all of the teenagers fled before they could be arrested (that seems unlikely; these teenagers must be superheroes or something). The next day, a housekeeper found that the painting and various other objects (candles, laptops, etc.) were missing. A glass coffee table was also broken.
You whipper-snappers! Whatever happened to just standing in front of a 7-Eleven and telling people you lost your ID until some creepy dude with a mustache buys you a six pack and then drinking it in the parking lot? Let’s blame it on the Internet and move on.