Lindsay Lohan and James Deen Spend 4th of July Together, Definitely Did Not Have Sex

The perfect couple

James Deen is the best. We couldn’t be more excited for the male version of Sasha Grey to become a mainstream sensation, especially if he keeps up the hardcore porn and amazing blog entries.

But we’re a little worried that Mr. Deen has been spending time with the wrong influences ever since Bret Easton Ellis announced the cast of The Canyons

All these rumors of Lindsay Lohan and James Deen as a couple are obviously false, because if they had had sex yet, it would be online already. Still, we can’t help but wonder how lonely James Deen has to be in order to spend the 4th of July with his co-star. Especially since this was his tweet from earlier in the day:

So many questions! What was in that truck? What kind of gourmet dish could Ms. Lohan have brought to make up for being the least friend? Not a lesser friend. The least friend.

The only way we can find out the real nature of these two’s relationship is to audition to be extras in The Canyons. Who here is comfortable with nudity? It’s easier than unicycling, we promise.