Roundup: You Can’t Have a Giant Soda. You Can’t Have A Vibrator

R.I.P, Ray Harding.

The city shutdown a free vibrator giveaway from the Trojan condom company after it was determined they didn’t have the proper permits. The more than 300 people who lined up to receive the devices were disappointed. “Bloomberg doesn’t want anyone to have fun,” said one. “You can’t have a giant soda. You can’t have a vibrator.”

Many puns on the story were available to the tabloids.

Breaking: The giveaway is back on.


Governor Cuomo signed the ‘Sewage Pollution Right to Know Act.’

Tom Allon is running for Mayor of New York City, newspaper reports.

Mayor Bloomberg will hold immigration forums with Bill Daley and Rupert Murdoch.

Bloomberg News had to pay an unspecified sum to the parent company of CQ Roll Call after staffers there were discovered to be using old Roll Call login names and passwords to access databases.

Romney celebrated meeting the halfway point in his fundraising goal in New York City this morning, telling donors “So if you feel tired now, you gotta go take a couple vitamins because we’re gonna really have a strong push to the finish line. It’s a little bit like chopping wood. You look over at your pile and you can actually see how it looks.”

The top ten donors fueling President Barack Obama’s super PAC.

Longtime Obama conspiracy theorist Jerome Corsi claims there is “very strong” evidence the president was once married to a Pakistani man.

Illinois congressman Joe Walsh is facing charges of racial insensitivity after he referred to Obama as “son” at a campaign event.

An ad targeting Rep. Allen West portrays him beating old women.

Andrew Sullivan dubs former Clinton advisor Dick Morris “America’s Premiere Snake-Oil Salesman.”

#slatepitches Matthew Ygelsias defends Mitt Romney’s tax plan on progressive grounds.

Romney is embracing Romneycare again.

A new poll showed Romney slipping.