Barack Obama’s Campaign Emails Are Starting to Make Us Uncomfortable

  • 151399605 Barack Obamas Campaign Emails Are Starting to Make Us Uncomfortable
    You know they’re getting a little too personal. There’s not a day that goes by that we don’t have a minor heart attack reading those “grabby” subject lines from the campaign, before realizing that they’re not from a guy we met at a bar last night. Why are they always so personal? Why do Barack Obama, Joe Biden, Bill Clinton, Julian Castro and, yes, even Michelle, send us these vaguely headed emails that are both too vague and way too personal at the same time?

    Guys, you need to stop. Please. We’d change our email address, if we thought that would do any good. But you’d find us, wouldn’t you? You always do.

  • Oh, sorry President...we just didn't expect you to be hovering over our bed like that. Oh, you made breakfast? That's...that's really sweet.

    Oh, sorry President...we just didn't expect you to be hovering over our bed like that. Oh, you made breakfast? That's...that's really sweet.

  • It has the smoky undertone of a discovered affair and a jealous spouse.

    It has a smoky undertone of a discovered affair and a jealous spouse.

  • Look, we are really busy dealing with our own Barack stuff right now. WE have no time for your malarkey.

    Look, we are really busy dealing with our own Barack stuff right now. WE have no time for your malarkey.

  • Oh god, what happened? What did Michelle say? Don't even tell us,we'll just pack our bags.

    Oh god, what happened? What did Michelle say? Don't even tell us,we'll just pack our bags.

  • Followed by your concerned best male friend checking to see if you're okay.

    Followed by your concerned best male friend checking to see if you're okay.

  • The whole night is starting to come together.

    The whole night is starting to come together.

  • The best defense to this kind of drama is to just not reply.

    The best defense to this kind of drama is to just not reply.