Woman Needs Fake Roommates, Apartment to Dupe Visiting Family

the wedding banquet groupe Woman Needs Fake Roommates, Apartment to Dupe Visiting Family

One thing leads to another.

We all know how this will end. A Korean woman who lives with her Caucasian fiancé needs to borrow an apartment with female roommates to trick her visiting brother, who’s been sent by the family back home to make sure little sis is doing okay in the big city. And not, you know, living in sin with a white guy whom she plans to marry. And definitely not dreaming up intricate ruses to deceive her overprotective family about the fact that she is living with a white guy whom she plans to marry.

The woman posted her quandary on Reddit “Offering $100 (or more) for help with a weird request,” where it was thankfully spotted by Gothamist. Apparently this woman has never seen The Wedding Banquet. But, as anyone who has ever created a multifaceted lie to cover up the most basic realities of his or her life (or anyone who has ever watched a romantic comedy) knows, these things have a way of spiraling out of control.

“I’m a Asian foreign student who is now engaged to my lovely boyfriend – who is white. My loving and protective Korean mother does not know any of this, and I have (unfortunately) been lying to her for nearly a year now. Amongst a slew of other issues/lies involved here regarding faking my activities in New York (this story only goes deeper), she is now sending my brother to NYC for the first time to visit me, and check up on me. He is arriving in the next few days to stay until the end of October.”

But don’t worry, this woman has already taken care of the complicated footwork that this kind of deception requires!

I have convinced my mother and my brother that my boyfriend’s friend left town for work for a few weeks, and just so happens to be the same time my brother is coming, and is able to hook us up with his apartment to stay at.

Big sigh of relief, right? Everything’s going to be fine? Nope! Perhaps sensing that something fishy is going on, her family is demanding to see her apartment.

Unfortunately, my mother and brother both want to see my ‘apartment’ that I live in, in which I have told her I have female roommates in a 2/3 bedroom apartment. I will have to take my brother to this mysterious apartment in the next few weeks, albeit for just an hour to look around to make sure I’m doing good in the big city.

So here’s what she’s proposing:

I’m offering $100 to anyone, preferably female in a 2/3 bedroom apt with other female roommates, to let me use their room for an hour to pretend it’s mine. It has to be furnished but doesn’t need anything special since he doesn’t know what furniture I have, would just bring along a school textbook, picture and what not. Extra cash for pretending to be my roommate!

Naturally, this plan can only go wrong in an infinite number of terrible ways. The brother sees something in the bedroom that’s even worse than living with one’s fiancé! One of her friends accidentally betrays the fact that she’s engaged! The brother falls in love with one of the fake roommates and insists on going back to the pseudo-apartment all the time! Hilarity, and of course heartbreak, ensues.

kvelsey@observer.com