How Would You Like to Take a Sexy Sewage Tour Around Greenpoint for Valentine’s Day?

Happy V-Day sweetheart!

Happy V-Day sweetheart!

Let’s face it: Roses are passe. Chocolate makes you fat, even if you eat it “ironically.” (Whatever the hell that means.) And a nice card isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on if you don’t have another special gift awaiting your lover this Valentine’s Day.

If your special sweety is a hipster residing in the Williamsburg/Greenpoint area, this holiday is especially hard. What can you get them, a pre-order of the Girls: Season 1 box set? Luckily, the Department of Environmental Protection has your back. Raw sewage, anyone?

According to the AP’s Big Story Tumblr:

The Department of Environmental Protection is again offering Valentine’s Day tours of the Newtown Creek sewage treatment plant in Brooklyn’s Greenpoint section.

The DEP says it’s offering three tours this year due to “overwhelming demand.”

The 9:30 a.m. and 1 p.m. tours were quickly filled. So another was added at 11 a.m. Thursday.

Highlights include the plant’s giant egg-shaped digesters, which break down noxious waste into harmless sludge and gas.

This idea is especially good for any young lady who claims to hate Valentine’s Day, uses phrases like “the Hallmark-industrial complex,” and has still made you confirm four times that you’re going to be around to “hang” on Thursday. This should teach her about managing expectations.