Judge Finds Lindsay Lohan’s Lawyer Not Competent to Represent Her

Oh, if only this applied to Lindsay Lohan as well! A California judge told Mark Heller, Lindsay Lohan’s lawyer for her criminal case stemming from her insane car accident last June, that he had no idea how to practice law. Which is probably what drew Ms. Lohan, who has no idea how to act, into the arms of this silly, screwed-up man.

Mr. Heller, much like Ms. Lohan herself, was also big on excuses, telling the judge the reason he was unable to file the correct paperwork in time for a dismal of charges was because her previous lawyers had made such a mess of things. Unfortunately, the woman who sponsored Mr. Heller in court to be Ms. Lohan’s representative has “never practiced law a day in her life.”

Now Ms. Lohan is faced with two choices: either get another lawyer, or waive her right to a competent one. Hmmm … wonder what she’ll choose!

Ha ha, just kidding!