Coney Island Applebee’s Opens with an Old Fashioned Shark ‘Massacree’

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Tank of death! (Facebook)

Sad news today from the shark-infested waters of the Coney Island Applebee’s. First, a shark died after colliding with an underwater ferris wheel, and then another shark went on a fishy killing spree. Or, as the Daily News put it, “death is on the menu.”

Who could have predicted that putting a shark tank inside an Applebee’s might have been a bad idea?

Tragedy struck the super-classy Coney Island Applebee’s on Friday when a whitetip shark died after crashing into a Wonder Wheel replica inside the 5,000 gallon “Wonders of the Sea” tank. Later, a blacktip shark named Zane was removed from the tank after chowing on three lookdown fish in what the Daily News is calling “a shocking killing spree.”

“They went from being in an ocean to being in a tank,” the Applebee’s owner, Zane Tankel, told the Daily News in defense of the blacktip, who just so happens to be his namesake. “They were all disoriented.”

Blackfin shark. (Getty)

Blackfin shark. (Getty)

“We are concerned about his health,” Mr. Tankel added. “The sharks are a big investment.”

Zane Jr. was taken to an aquarium in Fishkill, N.Y., which we assume is the deep-sea equivalent of “a nice farm upstate.”

An Animal Planet camera crew happened to be on hand at the time of the killing, so hopefully the gory spree will be uploaded to YouTube sometime in the near future.

And for those interested in potentially witnessing another massacre firsthand (three smooth-hound sharks remain in the tank, and the Applebee’s staff seems to have no plans to remove the Wonder Wheel), the restaurant officially opened for business today.