John McAfee Is More Than Fine That Intel Wants Nothing To Do With Him

He's probably partying with strippers as we speak.

John McAfee probably smiled like this at the exciting news. (Getty)

John McAfee probably smiled like this at the exciting news. (Getty)

Things are finally looking up for John McAfee! Intel is dropping his name from the godforsaken antivirus software he sold to them in 1994, meaning the international man of mystery is finally free to party with strippers and snort bath salts and shoot guns at shit to his heart’s content…oh wait, that happened already.

And now that you’ve lost your breakfast appetite, the news: Digital Trends reported that at CES on Monday, Intel boss Brian Krzanich announced that his company was embarking on a year-long rebranding exercise, part of which will involve replacing the “McAfee Antivirus” title with “Intel Security.” 

But don’t expect the self-proclaimed “Eccentric Millionaire” to be upset, in any way, about the decision. Mr. McAfee has, after all, publicly lamented (again, see here) the fact he still receives volumes of mail begging for directions to uninstall the software, even though he sold the company to Intel for $7.7 billion more than fifteen years ago. 

“I am now everlastingly grateful to Intel for freeing me from this terrible association with the worst software on the planet. These are not my words, but the words of millions of irate users,” Mr. McAfee told the BBC, in total Mr. McAfee fashion. “My elation at Intel’s decision is beyond words.”

In related news, we’re pretty sure that despite the Intel rebranding exercise—however intensive it may be—your antivirus software will still be a piece of garbage that makes your computer run at snail speed.