On the Rocks: Injured Man Sues City for Seducing Him With Boulder

“Just because I’m an adult doesn’t mean I don’t get to explore the world, too.”

This is probably the adult version of the time you skinned your knee doing something dumb as a kid and cried about it.

Jonathan Stock, a Brooklyn resident, is suing New York after taking a fall off of the rocks at Hudson River Park and rupturing his Achilles tendon.

“Just because I’m an adult doesn’t mean I don’t get to explore the world, too,” Mr. Stock told the New York Post.

The defendant rock in question is the 10-foot-tall centerpiece of the park’s Stonefield (not to be confused with the internet’s name for the Emma Stone Andrew Garfield romance) which the park’s website describes as “selected for their special shapes and unusual sculptural qualities.”

Mr. Stock required surgery after his fall, and said he felt trapped in the third floor Manhattan walk-up he was living in at the time. He is now suing for unspecified damages, citing the lack of warning signs as negligence.

“It just invites you or anybody with any athletic sense to give it a try,” said Andrew Spinelli, Mr. Stock’s attorney, told the Post. 

We would probably suggest anybody with any athletic sense to give the actual rock climbing nearby a try, but this would probably offend Mr. Stock’s sensibilities as a child at heart.

That being said, we applaud the Peter Pan mindset, Mr. Stock. Shame he wasn’t thinking happy thoughts when he fell.