Lisa Vanderpump and Ken Todd want to reward their son Max for being such a good dishwasher at their restaurant, so they’re buying him a $630,000 apartment. Lisa says the “shithole” (her word) will be Max’s surprise gift on the anniversary of the date when they adopted him as a baby. Er, thanks?
Kyle and Kim Richards are dressed to the nines for some casual shopping. Kim’s daughter Brooke is getting ready to have her baby and Kim is beyond excited. Kyle decides to harsh her buzz by telling Kim what Lisa Rinna said to Eden Sassoon – specifically, that Kim isn’t truly sober and is close to death. Kim’s jaw literally drops open, she’s so shocked. “I think it is impossible for Lisa Rinna to not talk about me,” she says. Would anybody disagree?
Eden and Rinna meet up in a park for the first time since Rinna was confronted in Mexico by Kyle. Rinna is fake nice and scary with Eden. “You’ve been a busy girl,” she says in a chill-inducing tone. She then lays into Eden, insisting she doesn’t remember saying Kim was close to death. She tries to lay a huge guilt trip on Eden about throwing her under the bus. Eden is somewhat timid with her, but doesn’t back down. Rinna thought she had Eden in her back pocket and seriously miscalculated.
We next see Rinna at Project Angel Food, a prominent LA charity to feed the homeless, to volunteer with her friends in the kitchen. She’s getting their humanitarian of the year award. If you don’t know how these awards work, the charity approaches a high-profile person and offers them an award in exchange for them contributing or raising a certain amount of money for the charity. This is a purchased honor, not one earned by humanitarian acts.
Eden arrives for KP duty and Rinna says the fact that Eden already donated $2,000 to Project Angel Food means more than their bad blood. Erika Girardi also arrives on time, but the other ladies are 45+ minutes late, which Rinna takes badly. Eileen is still sick from Mexico and isn’t there.
When Dorit Kemsley drives up in her Bentley convertible with Kyle and LVP, Kyle asks her if she couldn’t have driven a more humble car to come feed “these people.” Not the wisest choice of words, Kyle. Erika is assigned to chop chillies, which she admits is about as much culinary responsibility as she can be expected to handle. Eden is portioning granola while staring hard at Kyle and Dorit while the two of them wonder why she’s there if Rinna’s so mad at her. Kyle is told by the kitchen manager to start scooping stinky tilapia, and Kyle can barely hold back her gag reflex. Erika sees what she’s scooping and asks if it’s cookie dough. Kyle does an excellent impersonation of Erika’s speaking voice in answering her.
Lisa tells Erika she likes Eden, and Erika responds, “She’s okay.” Lisa says in her interview that Eden is intense but vulnerable, like a “broken bird.” Let me guess: LVP is going to “rescue” Eden and then expect her to do her bidding, like she did with the previous “broken bird,” Brandi Glanville? Ugh.
Dorit makes a snide remark about how Kyle is now stuck scooping granola with Eden. LVP asks Kyle why she’s not working with the smelly fish anymore. “She’s been demoted to working with me,” Eden says. Kyle says she’s sorry if Eden thinks she’s been rude – she knows she’s not talking, but it’s because she’s having some feelings and not trying to be disrespectful. Eden says she doesn’t think she’s being rude; she understands. Eden asks if she’d like to talk someday. Kyle (somewhat reluctantly) says sure, but “obviously not here.” As they wrap up, the ladies agree they’ll all talk things over at some point. Eden says she feels good, but she’s obviously troubled by this dynamic.
Ken and LVP go furniture shopping for Max’s apartment. It’s kind of fun to watch them bargain hunt, because I assumed “bargain” meant $50k sofas and $20k mirrors. But they’re getting him a beautiful blue velvet sofa for $1550 (marked down from $5200) and a coffee table discounted from $3200 to $1200, plus a rug for $599. Lisa predicts a Mother of the Year award for herself for decorating Max’s “shithole” so nicely.
There’s another endearing, very sweet scene of Dorit with her toddler son Jagger and baby Phoenix. More of this, please, producers. Eden comes to visit and Dorit tells her what went down in Mexico, and that she told Kyle she doesn’t think Eden would make those things up about Rinna. Dorit asks Eden if she thinks Rinna’s personality is “induced in some way.” Eden says in her interview that she’s confused. “Is she accusing Rinna of having a pill problem?” Does anybody really think Rinna needs drugs to be crazy and mean?
Erika and her husband Tom meet for lunch. Erika says their limited time together is totally focused, and it works for them not to be in each other’s faces all the time. They have such a playful and fun relationship. Erika thanks Tom for letting her borrow his plane so she can go see her mom. She explains in her interview that for the first 10 years of their marriage, she was strictly by his side and was even the “First Lady” of a few legal organizations. “Boy, they hated my ass” she laughs. Long pause. “Still do.” Wink. Damn, she’s good. Tom tells her how proud he is of her and you can tell he really admires his wife.
Kyle is on the set of her scripted show for TV Land, “American Woman.” She’s under pressure for the pilot to do well, so that the show will get picked up for a multi-episode series – and it’s a lot more work than she expected.
Rinna getting her makeup done for the Project Angel Food Angel Awards. She’s nervous to receive their humanitarian award. Eileen calls and says she’s not only still sick, but she also has pink eye, so she’s staying home. Rinna takes it a lot better than I would have expected. She does not take it well that LVP is skipping the awards. Her nephew is in town, but Rinna insists Lisa Vanderpump would be there if the event was about Lisa Vanderpump. Probably.
Kyle and Dorit ride together to the awards and Dorit fills her in on her conversation with Eden. “I know Lisa Rinna said these things, because it echoes things she’s said in the past,” Kyle states, saying it explains why Eden has been acting so gravely concerned. Kyle says in her interview that she would hope the ladies are all mature enough that they can keep issues separate, which is why she’s going to Rinna’s awards event despite what she said about Kim.
At dinner, Kyle asks Eden if she has a boyfriend. It turns out she’s having “an emotional relationship” over the phone with a guy in London, who she met online. He’s a former model covered in tattoos, who looks like he spends all day doing yoga and taking selfies. Kyle warns her that it sounds like “one big flippin’ disaster.” She adds, “That sounds like the worst thing I’ve ever heard. And if you were related to me, I would put my foot down.” Eden says she’s just enjoying herself, and Kyle responds, “You can do better. Even I know that and I don’t even know you.” Kyle seems genuine, and Eden is very touched. Kyle tells Dorit she can tell Eden is very misguided but well-intended, and needs some mentoring from someone. “She really seems to want acceptance and love,” Kyle says in her interview. “Now I’m starting to feel bad.” The night ends without drama – which will surely disappoint LVP.