By Kim Velsey 3/05 5:31pm

Drinking Games

U.S. begs: no more drinking and debating.

DrUNk! U.S. Wants Wasted Diplomats Banned From U.N. Budget Debates

Americans are known the world over for being embarrassing drunks. We’re constantly being told that other countries have a more mature relationship with alcohol, that their collegiate years are not spent chugging cheap grain alcohol and getting sick in communal bathrooms. But in a surprising turn of events, the U.S. is asking diplomats from other countries to lay off the booze, according to Reuters. At least during United Nations budget debates.

Joseph Torsella, deputy U.S. ambassador to the United Nations for management and reform, came to the General Assembly’s budget committee with a “modest proposal that the negotiating rooms should in the future be an inebriation-free zone.” Read More

By Jess Schiewe 6/12/12 4:17pm

Greensward

Yep, you won't be seeing this anytime soon.

Another Dry Summer? A Plea for Drinking in Public

There are two types of people in this world: those who think that alcohol creates problems and those who think that alcohol solves them. Most people believe in the latter, but some believe in the former. And for some reason that “some” always happens to be elected officials. Are we lucky, or what?

Because of this unfortunate coincidence, New Yorkers are looking at a mighty dry summer. Put away that flask, leave your portable wine carafe at home, and stuff a Smart Water into that drink holder on your beach chair because there will be no public drinking allowed. Read More

By Una LaMarche 6/05/12 8:00am

Mothers Superior

(Peter Oumanski)

Bottle Feeders: Should Procreation Necessitate a Personal Prohibition?

Before I became a mother, I was, as my Sonoma County aunt is fond of saying, “a lover of the grape.” I liked my wine. So much so, in fact, that when I got pregnant, I continued to hold stemware at parties, feigning sips, because I knew that if I were to abstain among anyone who had seen the old, half-a-bottle-a-night me in action, the jig would immediately be up. Read More

By Foster Kamer 1/11/12 5:14pm

LET MY PIMM'S CUP GO!

Celebrity Sightings In New York City - March 23, 2011

Mayor Bloomberg Doomsday Proposal to Curb New York City Booze Sales: Eliminated After Less Than a Day

First they came for the smokers, and we kvetched. Then they came for the trans fats, and we were like, sure, we could stand to lose a few pounds. Then they came for our salt, and we were like, are you serious? Salt? But when you try to come for the booze, Mayor Bloomberg has likely learned an important lesson:

New Yorkers will get smashy. Read More

By Rex Reed 12/07/11 1:53pm

movies

Jane, Lowe and Piven.

I Melt With You Shares a Circle of Jerks

Grown men behaving badly are everywhere on film, but a more stomach-turning band of incompetent losers has never been assembled than the scumbags in the stupidly titled I Melt With You. Four obnoxious human brussels sprouts get together annually for a week of debauchery and self-destruction in a rented beach house in California’s majestic Big Sur. Read More

By Emily Atkin 9/27/11 7:32pm

Expose

Final_SalonDrinking

A Blow-Out Made Me Blotto! The Illegal Scourge of Salon Drinking

We weren’t three minutes into our pedicure—or two toes—and already The Observer was getting wasted.

The place was Dashing Diva in Greenwich Village, a chain nail salon with 12 locations in the city and two in California. The place’s decor resembles a little like what might happen if Elle Woods met Malibu Barbie. The only part that isn’t either bright pink or white are the racks of multicolored nail polish on the walls. The pedicure station is a banquette of pink pillows, cut off from the rest of the salon by a wall of mini pearly-pink tiles. It’s a nice place to get plastered. Read More