Oh You Fancy Huh?
Today, Ashton Kutcher’s take on Steve Jobs hits theaters. There’s a good chance many of you will decide to check it out. But you’ll probably want to be prepared, right? And by that we mean smuggle a flask of whisky into a late-night showing. It definitely seems like Woz could’ve used a drink while watching.
Just in case, here is a handy drinking game. Feel free to cue it up on your phone and play along the theater, but only if you’re sitting next to Hunter Walk, of course.
Take a drink whenever you see:
Big Apple Idolatry
Have you ever had a fantasy about being like Ashton Kutcher? Ours involve the emo-induced time travel powers from “The Butterfly Effect,” but some version of “untold startup riches” or “dating Mila Kunis” are also acceptable.
New York City-based startup The Fancy* is trying a different approach. In September, the commerce-minded photo-sharing network–which lets users post pics of products and in theory purchase the items directly from the site–went the Birchbox route with a monthly subscription service. The idea being luring in users with small-scale affordable versions of the pricey, aspirational goods The Fancy tends to attract.
Big Apple Idolatry
– Ashton Kutcher made $24 million last year. Sure, it’s not entirely from Two and a Half Men. (After all, he only gets $700,000 per episode). The rest is savvy tech investments, but still. That like seven Lena Dunham books!
– Remember how ex-Housewife Jill Zarin was like “I didn’t even want to Read More
– Lindsay Lohan is voting for Mitt Romney, which is probably going to hurt him in the polls even worse than last night’s VP debate.
Dermot Mulroney–the actor from My Best Friend’s Wedding and The New Girl who is often confused for Party Monsters and American Horror Story‘s Dylan McDermott–has taken a role in the non-Aaron Sorkin-related Steve Jobs biopic.
Is that the one with Ashton Kutcher? We’re so confused!
Two weeks ago, Phil Mushnick, a respected veteran sports writer for The New York Post, published a column about the Brooklyn Nets’ new brand identity, as designed with the help of Jay-Z. The team—previously known as the New Jersey Nets—had switched their colors to black and white. “Why not have him apply the full Jay-Z treatment?” Mr. Mushnick suggested, referring to the team’s part-owner. “Why the Brooklyn Nets when they can be the New York N——s. The cheerleaders could be the Brooklyn B—hes or Hoes …”
Capitalizing off the success of Mad Men, AMC’s reality game show The Pitch pits “teams” of creative ad agencies against one another as they via to land the week’s big clients. The obvious flaw of this concept is that no one who works in advertising acts or looks like Don Draper. (They’re more like a bunch of whiny Pete Campbells. Especially Tracy Wong from WDCW Advertising…he’s the worst).
That, and no one wants to watch a show about creatives. Still, the show has some residual Mad Men appeal, and it’s a mildly entertaining palate-cleanser after watching Roger Sterling drop acid.
Last night, The Pitch even managed to be unintentionally relevant; offering a salacious inside look into the mindset of PopChips marketing team, pre-Ashton-debacle, when they showed up as the clients of the week.
Phew. That’s a weight off our shoulders. While we were really not sure how to feel about Ashton Kutcher’s PopChips ad, released on YouTube earlier this week and featuring Mr. Kutcher playing a lot of different characters in a dating video like he was Tracey Ullman or something, we were pretty sure it was unfunny. But was it racist? Especially if one of the characters was Indian and Mr. Kutcher dressed in “brown face”?
Backstabber! Just last month, Charlie Sheen was praising his Two and a Half Men replacement, Ashton Kutcher, for following in his footsteps and completely falling apart the classy way he was handling tabloid pressure. (Since joining the show, Mr. Kutcher has separated from wife Demi Moore after illicit, drug-fueled photos of him with other women began cropping up.)
“I was kind of impressed… I thought, ‘Hey, man, make it colorful!’” Mr. Sheen said about Mr. Kutcher’s exploits. He’d previously given Mr. Kutcher his blessing on taking over for him on the show as well.
But Charlie Sheen, truth-sayer that he is, couldn’t contain his contempt for Kutcher and CBS during a TMZ phone interview yesterday.
The independent Manhattan movie house Film Forum has decided to pull its advertising from the Village Voice, citing concerns about Backpage.com, the classifieds site owned by Voice parent company Village Voice Media.
Longtime Film Forum director Karen Cooper told Off the Record that Nicholas Kristof’s Friday op-ed in The New York Times prompted her decision.