Introducing Toilets of New York, a Tumblr devoted the the peculiar artistry of the dive bar toilet. (Finally!) The site features dozens of photographs of the gross, the graffitied, the ugly—and in some rare occasions, the clean.

The blog is the brainchild of Ian MacAllen and largely features hipster spots in Brooklyn and the East Village. The Observer reached out to the toilet traveler and asked him how, exactly, he came to chronicle crappers.

“I realized someone was taking a whole lot of time on these bathrooms. They’re really delicately curated, both the objects in them and the wallpaper,” he told The Observer.

But when does inspiration strike? Mr. MacAllen said he choses his "subjects" based on where he happens to be hanging out. And while he doesn’t go to bars solely in search of the next flush, he admitted to taking a leak just to check out the facilities. And after two months of toilet touring, he’s starting to notice patterns.

“To me, the graffiti in the bathroom is something kind of in itself interesting,” he said. “Some [bathrooms] have the classic New York City subway tiles, some have this black and white theme from the 1920s.”

Now, next time you drunkenly stumble into the bathroom at Duck Duck or Cherry Tavern after one too many PBRs, you’ll know what you’re in for. Which is, in some cases, toilet paper all over floor, empty glasses on the back of the tank, red mood lighting or our favorite: a sign that reads “PLEASE, PLEASE PEE ON THE TOILET AND NOT ON THE SEAT."

Click through the slide show for a sampling of the Toilets of New York’s photos. Just don’t forget to wash your hands.

A last in a lifetime experience! (Touchstone Pictures)

But, women, we implore you: No matter how desperate you are, don't go taking every two-bit dancing/bartending job listed on Craigslist. No matter how enticing the advertisement may look,  it's always a good rule of thumb that if someone can't be bothered to Google the spelling of their favorite movie of all time, they will not be able to pay you in anything other than sweaty dollar bills stuffed into your thong.

*** Coyotee Ugly Type Brtnd No Exp Nec. (Great Tips)

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Date: 2012-11-13, 8:36AM EST
Reply to: see below

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The 21 Bar, a very popular Beach Bar located on Broadway & West 184 Street is looking to hire friendly bartenders with or without exp. to work in beach attire at Coyotee Ugly type bar.

Great tips every night

Immediate openings With or W/O Exp.

All types needed, slim, thick, light skin, dark skin Etc. This is a Real people place.

Improve your Bar-tending skills

Professional safe productive environment

One block from Trains and Buses

You must have open availability and be willing to start immediately. Please respond with your Info.

If you need any more discouragement from applying for this position, imagine the leer that might go on some guy's mug as he tells you, "This is a Real people place."

Or you could just read NYMag's review of the 21 Bar:

This tiny Washington Heights dive is known for two things: a two-for-one nightly happy hour that goes for almost every drink, and bikini-clad girls gyrating atop the bar counter to Latin slow jams and reggaeton. Considering the scenario, the joint stays (relatively) classy: no nudity, no lap dances. Pay no mind to the lack of draft beer. Ignore the Taco Bell–style adobe walls, and the choking-victim posters. Take a seat and enjoy yourself, very few strings attached.