Greg Smith, via nytimes.com

Bloomberg View's take on Goldman Sachs vice president Greg Smith's New York Times editorial-as-resignation reads like catty note written in Calc class and passed to all the Goldman Sachs employees reading the morning news on, well, their Bloomberg Terminals.

Just about every newspaper has treated yesterday's editorial as a news story in itself, including other departments of The New York Times. Rival Wall Street Journal covered it from every angle, publishing both the internal memo in which Goldman ceo Lloyd Blankfein responded to its allegations and a parody in the voice of Knicks coach Mike D'Antoni, who also resigned yesterday.

But today's un-bylined Bloomberg View editorial shows up even the parodies with its derision, synthesizing all the nasty things that cooler banker types said on Twitter yesterday.

Starting with the suggestion that Mr. Smith is naive:

"Apparently, when Greg Smith arrived at Goldman Sachs almost 12 years ago, the legendary investment firm was something like the Make-A-Wish Foundation -- existing only to bring light and peace and happiness to the world," it begins.

"One imagines Goldman bankers spending their days delivering fresh flowers to elderly shut-ins and providing shelters for abandoned cats."

Mr. Smith's main argument--that Goldman rips off, disrespects and misleads clients so "the firm" can make more money off them--is treated with the same sarcasm.

"It’s tragic that Goldman is losing an employee who realizes that you need customers to stay in business," the View writes.

And, naturally, it snickers at his ping pong accolades.

"And what an employee! He worked at Goldman as an intern in college and worked there continuously until today. “I was selected as one of 10 people (out of a firm of more than 30,000) to appear on our recruiting video, which is played on every college campus we visit around the world.” Then there was being “a Rhodes Scholar national finalist” and “winning a bronze medal for table tennis at the Maccabiah Games in Israel, known as the Jewish Olympics.”

Check out the tour-de-snark's surprisingly reasonable conclusion, as well as over 500 heated comments, at Bloomberg.

Here's one unexpected (but tough to pity) victim of the MF Global meltdown: Mayor Michael Bloomberg.

When the brokerage filed for bankruptcy, Bloomberg LP lost 600 terminal subscribers, or about $1 million in monthly revenue, The New York Times reports, causing the company to miss target sales by 12 percent and possibly taking a toll on bonuses.

Sales of the Bloomberg terminal, a finance industry must-have, fund the vast majority of Bloomberg LP's journalism outfit. As a result, the size of its reporting staff is  closely linked to the health of the economy.

But things aren't so bad yet: Bloomberg View executive editor David Shipley added five journalists to the editorial board today.

• Katy Roberts, The New York Times Week in Review editor
• James Gibney, features editor at The Atlantic
• Michael Newman, politics editor at Slate
• Marc Champion, Istanbul bureau chief at The Wall Street Journal
• Deborah Solomon--no, not that Deborah Solomon--economic policy reporter at The Wall Street Journal