With New York Observer alum Jim Windolf at the helm and featuring contributions from George Gurley and Mark Ames, Punch! put out three issues before announcing that it was going on hiatus on August 14. 

Jim Windolf (Right) at a Rufus Wainwright Performance at Rose Bar in 2010. (photo courtesy of Patrickmcmullan.com)

Now Punch! will be focusing entirely on its new app-developing platform, described by its company CEO as a "Blogger" for app makers, while putting its editorial plans on ice for the foreseeable future.

"Somewhere down the road, it became clear we had two businesses in our hands," David Bennahum, CEO of Punch! Media, told The Observer earlier this evening.  "We had potentially a media-business producing the Punch!  products, which you know, then we had the technology business giving other companies this very powerful tool that we developed ourselves."

The initial plan was to have the custom-app division fund the editorial content. After raising $2.25 million in seed funding from venture capital funds like Betaworks and Techstars, Punch! seemed poised to publish a year's worth of issues.

But after just three editions, the magazine is on "hiatus" and its editorial team, which included Brooke Siegel (formerly of Daily Candy), is no longer with the company. 

"We had to wind it all down," said Mr. Bennahum. "We couldn't do two things at the same time."

"As we kind of look at our options, knowing we really couldn't do both, it became clear that the technology business was just a very large and exciting opportunity relative to the original business," said Mr. Bennahum. "Doing the Punch! the magazine app well requires complete focus."

With the magazine scrapped (for now), Mr. Windolf said he is no longer with Punch! 

"If he [Mr. Bennahum] restarts the magazine, I'd like to do it, which might happen," he added. (Disclosure: Daniel Edward Rosen was commissioned by Mr. Windolf in June to write a story for Punch!).

The news came as a sudden and sad twist to a publication that just months ago was poised to reinvigorate the magazine medium with new interactive content. Videos like "32 and Pregnant" and "Tiny Pundits" (featuring The National Memo Editor-in-Chief Joe Conason and three precocious and pugnacious kids) were picked up by The Daily Mail, The Atlantic Wire and Politico and lauded as spot-on spoofs.

"We did some good things, got a lot of attention for the few issues I put out as editor," said Mr. Windolf. "I was especially happy with the videos made for Punch! by young director Chioke Nassor, a huge talent and great guy."

"Also nice magazine-style pieces by Mark Ames (on Romney's Mormon history) and George Gurley (on sad-sack character actor Fred Stoller) and a good essay on viral culture before the internet by Kliph Nesteroff ([who] writes for WFMU's Beware the Blog). So it was starting to come together, I think."

Mr. Windolf has spent the past month working on Fairchild Fashion Media's revival of M Magazine, edited by former Observer editor in chief (and Windolf muse) Peter Kaplan. M will be hitting newsstands on September 24.

"It looks incredible," said Mr. Windolf. "Kaplan put a lot of his tricks in there. It's beautiful; I hope it's a hit."

Speaking from the Democratic National Convention in Charlotte, N.C., Mr. Bennahum would not rule out a return of future issues of Punch! the magazine.

Despite rumors that Punch! had run out of money, Mr. Bennahum insisted that the company's financing is "secure."

"We don't have plans to announce another round of financing at this stage," he added.

drosen@observer.com 

The female George Gurley? (Getty Images)

It's been a while since we heard from Julia Allison--the hyperconfessional onetime princess of the Gawker-made "fameball" set, whose antics were brought to light, at a granular pace, on Gawker, and comprehensively in Vanessa Grigoriadis's New York article on web-era cynicism. The social-media socialite, famed for her writing on sex and relationships as well as for her woman-about-town presence at media parties, now has a syndicated newspaper column, which she promoted in an interview with Forbes.

Therein, she's asked whether people would react so strongly to her brand of photogenic puff-stories if she were a man. Ms. Allison said that she writes about her personal life less than did George Gurley, former Observer staff writer and beleaguered fiancé to "Hilly."

"He wrote years of columns, including transcripts of his couples therapy sessions with his girlfriend," said Ms. Allison, who implies that she does, or did, sort of, kind of the same thing.

We came up with a little quiz: Here are excerpts from Ms. Allison's Time Out New York writings between 2007 and 2009 and Mr. Gurley's New York Observer writings from the same period. Can you tell the two personal essayists apart? The answers lie in the links!

1. "Last week, I was at a party at the sophisticated Le Cirque restaurant on East 58th Street street for the HBO documentary Le Cirque: A Table in Heaven. I asked fabled Le Cirque owner Sirio Maccioni, a very elegant man who smelled great, what happens when his beautiful wife of 38 years, Egidiana, sees hot women all over him?"

2. "When I first got my shih tzu, Lilly, I couldn’t walk her without making people gush—so much so that eventually I refused to make eye contact, lest I never reach my destination. And when my ex–fiancé took her out? Mob scene."

3. "Ms. Mosbacher squealed at the sight of her friend Carl Bernstein and after they caught up, we asked the legendary investigative journalist what animal he most resembled.

“Cats!” he said. “I have a cat and I talk to her all day. She gets up on my keyboard and types. I’m independent like a cat.”

The male Julia Allison? (Patrick McMullan)

4. "Every once in a while, stay up all night talking and kissing, instead of thinking, What the eff time is it? I gotta get some sleep. Romeo and Juliet would so not go to bed."

5. "DR. SELMAN: Did you actually ask her to marry you?

[REDACTED]: I don’t think it even got to—I think she was so excited. One thing I like to clarify is that the prank Verdura gift box—I wasn’t trying to torment her. I had the other one, the real one, right on my lap, ready."

6. "Now, my theme song’s no longer 'Express Yourself'; it’s more like 'Hold On.' I wait for him to say it first, though I’ve been known to throw out stealth versions to surface the emotion (“I love you…when you smile/when you laugh/when you’re awake!”)."

7. [Quoting Ann Coulter] "What are her thoughts on feminism? 'This whole feminist movement has nothing to do with women. Until Bill Clinton, if a 70-year-old boss called his 60-year-old secretary "honey," they’d be screaming about white male patriarchal oppression.'"

8. "Holy crap—am I talking about Sex and the City with my grandmother?!"

ddaddario@observer.com :: @DPD_

John Koblin checks in with Dean Baquet, The New York Times' Washington Bureau Chief who tells him, “It is a huge moment for the bureau and it is a huge moment for the paper."

Leon Neyfakh writes, "Maybe it’s all the inauguration business going to Pub Crawl’s head, but at the end of the day, you kind of have to hand it to Markus Dohle. The guy came out of nowhere—knew next to nothing of American book publishing when tapped last spring at the age of 39 to become CEO of Random House Inc.—and succeeded against all odds in drafting the blueprint for a radical restructuring of the company that not only didn’t inspire widespread contempt among his new American colleagues, but was met to a large degree with reluctant approval."

Gillian Reagan meets Aaron Cohen, who's making a documentary called The Aaron Cohens, all about... Guys named Aaron Cohen. "There's 1,187 Aaron Cohens in the world," Mr. Cohen says. "We're going to try to meet all of them."

Plus: George Gurley's emails... Moira Hodgson's memoirs... Begley the Bookie.

DR. SELMAN: So what brings you back?

GEORGE: Well, it’s been six months.

HILLY: Well—

GEORGE: I’m a little groggy, I have to admit, because I had to work last night. Went to this benefit at the Central Park Zoo. What animal did you like best?

HILLY: This huge porcupine and the little fox and an owl that was just gorgeous.

GEORGE: And Al Gore was there.

HILLY: Whatever.

DR. SELMAN: Personally, I’ll leave the petting of wild animals to other people, ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

GEORGE: And then as usual, I started getting a little rambunctious, didn’t want to go home, so I put Hilly in a cab round midnight, and ended up in some apartment sitting around with kids half my age playing this game I invented. Got home at 7 a.m., I’m sorry to say.

DR. SELMAN: Why are you sorry to say?

GEORGE: I don’t really know if it was worth it.

HILLY [impatiently]: O.K., well there are a couple of things that have been going on recently—and I think for the most part, I’ve been very happy and I think you have, too—of course there are the ups and downs—but I’ve noticed this sort of return recently—since George turned 40. First of all, he wasn’t looking forward to turning 40, and he kept on saying over and over, ‘Don’t do anything, I don’t want any surprises.’ But something clicked in my mind, and I thought, Wait a second, I think everyone says that, but you have to do something. So I ended up organizing a surprise party—and I’m telling you there was a limit to the number of people, so I was really militant with the guests—I even told the editor in chief of a major publication, because he couldn’t commit—I was like, ‘I’m sorry, you may be standing out on the sidewalk because George is a popular guy.’ And he got scared of me, I’m telling you. Anyway, out of 60 people, 50 of them came. It was the most incredible thing. It was a little hippie lovefest for George.

DR. SELMAN: I actually read about it on Page Six.

GEORGE: I’ll never forget it. It was amazing how I was lured down there to the nightclub The whole time I was trying to get out of it, like ‘Nah, I really just wanna go home, I don’t want to drink tonight.’ Hilly and Jack were being real persistent and anyone in his right mind might have suspected something was up. I start up the stairs and see a friend of mine from high school and think, Oh, Henry just happens to be here. … And then I walked in and there were 50 people staring at me and moving in on me—it wasn’t no surprise party, it was fucking terrifying. It was like getting mugged or attacked by 50 people, but in a good way. I was so overwhelmed, my first instinct was to leave—bye, see ya! But after about four screwdrivers, I managed to smile.

DR. SELMAN: Well, what’s the problem here?

GEORGE: Let’s get all the good stuff out of the way. We also saw Van Halen, another big recent highlight.

HILLY: Wait. So the party was great. And the next day he was really happy, and I tried to show him my planning Excel sheet with all the names of the people in case—

GEORGE: So what does this have to do with our relationship?

HILLY: Well, one of the things I gave him for his birthday was a book of some of my favorite articles he’s written. I scanned all of them and put them into a computer format, and into a book form—

GEORGE: Uh-huh.

HILLY: So that they can be e-mailed, and they’re divided them into chapters—

GEORGE: Right.

HILLY: This is to make you seem more professional and organized, even though you’re an extremely charming person—that’s not the only reason all those people were there.

GEORGE: O.K.!

HILLY: It’s a combination of your talent and your intelligence and I don’t want you to lose the momentum of ego boost.

GEORGE: Lasted about a week. Why don’t we have a surprise party for me once a month?

HILLY: You need to make some money.

DR. SELMAN [to GEORGE]: Did you thank her, too?

HILLY: Oh, yeah!

GEORGE: I’ve always wanted to do that, have a monthly party and get all my socializing out of the way: If you want to see me, then be here.

HILLY: Well, another reason that I’m bringing this up is maybe you’ll be inspired to do something on your own. But that hasn’t happened.

DR. SELMAN: What do you mean?

HILLY: Taking the initiative to try to do something.

GEORGE: I can be pretty lazy.

DR. SELMAN: You thought that the effects of the party would somehow wear off on George.

HILLY: I think you could make an effort to maintain contact with some of those people, so they help keep your spirits up. When you’re sitting around feeling depressed about yourself, maybe it’s an extra sort of ego boost to give you the confidence to try to do something a little harder.

GEORGE [to DR. SELMAN]: I feel like a pig shat in my head.

Silence.

DR. SELMAN: You feel how?

GEORGE: Like a pig shat in my head.

Silence.

DR. SELMAN: Like a pig …?

GEORGE: Went to the bathroom in my head.

DR. SELMAN: Went to the bathroom in your head.

GEORGE: That’s from Withnail and I. Hilly didn’t like it.

HILLY: But regardless of this, even on nights when you get plenty of sleep, every day—

DR. SELMAN: Wait a second. How do you feel about what he just said?

HILLY: It’s nasty.

DR. SELMAN: Here you are, you put on this great party and you’re giving George a pep talk, saying how all these people came to his party to show how much they love him, and you were hoping that he would get encouraged by all that, and George’s response is that he feels like a pig shit in his head.

GEORGE: I-I-

HILLY: Zip it. No, I think that that’s proof positive that there is a little bit of a block there, almost like a learning disability about thinking about other people—and yourself—but in the right balance. I’m not saying I do it perfectly. But you have to start by giving yourself more credit while simultaneously being sensitive or least aware of the people around you, who you actually care about.

GEORGE: I’ve been called an idiot savant.

HILLY: Yesterday, for example—

GEORGE: It’s my turn to talk.

HILLY: No, no, no. Zip it! So we were invited to this Wildlife Conservation Society, wonderful black-tie event. We had a whole month to prepare for this. We got to sit down and have a wonderful dinner, Al Gore was there, the whole thing was very exciting. So the night before, I said, ‘George! Where’s your tuxedo? Leave it out and then tomorrow morning I’ll try to spruce it up, de-lint it and iron it for you.’ So the next morning I was doing that—what do I find when I’m ironing the pants? There’s a hole in the crotch—not just a little hole. So I went to work and sent him an e-
mail saying, ‘George! You can’t wear those.’ So he wrote back, ‘I’ll just wear dark boxers.’ That’s ridiculous! And then about an hour later, he had a better idea, which was: ‘I’ll just use safety pins.’ And this is the guy who’s afraid of keeping his cell phone in his pocket for fear of growing impotent. Safety pins?

GEORGE: Yeah.

HILLY: And so finally I said, ‘George, bring them here right now. There’s a tailor around the corner and I’m sure they’ll rush and fix them for you.’ I mean, people paid a lot of money for him to be there as their guest at this table.

GEORGE: I know, and then I got in trouble for not sitting at the table and running around shmoozing under the tent.

HILLY: You waited until the last minute to deal with your tuxedo and I was at work and had other stuff to do besides concentrating on your outfit. I had major wardrobe malfunctions of my own.

GEORGE: This morning, I read on the Internet something a commenter wrote about me after this article I wrote; she wrote: ‘Selfish bastard, isn’t he?’ This was somewhat devastating.

HILLY: How do you know it was a girl?

GEORGE: I just assumed. Or some real ineffectual weakling dude. This comment really has had an effect on me today, and what I’ve decided is maybe there is some truth to that, that I am in fact a selfish bastard.

HILLY: Well, if you were that selfish a person, then those people wouldn’t have come to your party.

GEORGE: I think there’s something to be said for selfishness. What does this person want me to do, go volunteer?

DR. SELMAN: I think everybody’s got to be a little bit selfish. I think it’s not entirely abnormal. But I’m still trying to understand why we had the four- or five-month hiatus and why you’re back now.

GEORGE: I think my superiors wanted me to stop navel gazing so much. And maybe some readers were getting a little sick of me. … Well, it’s really good being back. I feel much better already. All I do is look at a computer screen all day, so it’s good to have this interaction. Had a twitch in my eye for week—you ever hear of this?

DR. SELMAN: Yes

HILLY: Well, he’s also had some moments when he’s been feeling really down and he had a few episodes of blowing up about where we live. He feels like a prisoner in the apartment because he doesn’t leave all day. I get home at the end of the day and he’s still in his pajamas. The kitchen is filled with maybe 40 empty glasses and then he wants me, he expects me to—what do you call it?—entertain him. Which is fine, but I have other stuff that I need to do, too. And what I’ve been trying to say is, Well, George you’ve got to find something to do, just get yourself into the pattern, even if it’s walking to Starbucks or Gristedes.

GEORGE: I need to look into that organization Big Brother. Be great if I had someone who would swing by and hang out with me.

DR. SELMAN: Are you depressed?

GEORGE: I’m always a little of that. Being self-aware and realistic.

DR. SELMAN: I’ve offered to give you antidepressants.

GEORGE: You know what? It would be so great if they had short-term Prozac. Like if I could take some right now, and it would kick in and get me over this hangover.

HILLY: When I started taking Prozac a long time ago, I felt a difference immediately.

GEORGE [to HILLY]: Not trying to be rude, but do you think for the next 20 minutes we could each limit our comments to four or five sentences max?

DR. SELMAN: What you mean by that, George?

GEORGE: I need to say some things and she—

DR. SELMAN: You think Hilly’s talking too much?

GEORGE: I like what she’s saying, but I’d like to add to it, because we’re talking about me here and I might have some insight. I know I have to get out of the apartment more, into the city, I have to deal with people, talk to them live in person, not on e-mail, which I’m beginning to think is evil. I’m addicted to e-mail, and it’s changed my whole outlook on life and brain chemistry—nice going, geeks!

DR. SELMAN: Did you ever take the Adderall?

GEORGE: I, um, I like it a lot. I ran out. I think I need to get some more.

HILLY: But no … There’s something about Adderall—

GEORGE: No-no-no-no—

DR. SELMAN: Wait—

GEORGE: No! No—

HILLY: I don’t know if you were taking it the way you’re supposed to.

GEORGE [hoarse]: Can I just say one more thing? The fact is, Hilly and I are living together and I’ve always had this fantasy—when I spent a lot of time with someone I start to mimic them and become like them, talk like them, act like them. So I don’t know, I thought if Hilly is on Prozac, maybe I should do it, too.

DR. SELMAN: But Hilly’s also a very organized person and that hasn’t rubbed off.

GEORGE: Well, maybe that has something to do with the ’zac.

HILLY: But going back to the Adderall thing, I think what many people think is, ‘Oh, it’s a way to stay up late.’ No, the way you should be taking it is during your daily routine, and the prescribed amounts.

GEORGE: Hilly and I once did tequila shots and hung out with David Lee Roth.

DR. SELMAN: I think there was also an issue of helping to coordinate your schedules because George was staying up at odd hours—your schedules didn’t mesh.

HILLY: It didn’t work.

DR. SELMAN: It didn’t really work?

HILLY: At this point I think you almost need electroshock when you stay up past your bedtime.

DR. SELMAN: You think he should have shock therapy?

HILLY: I think he needs to be punished when it’s past his bedtime and he won’t go to sleep.

GEORGE: Is that making a comeback, electroshock?

DR. SELMAN: It never went away.

GEORGE: Interesting. They did that to Lou Reed.

HILLY: Every single night he stays up so late. It’s got to be lonely. Being up late, in the middle of the night, in the wee hours in the morning, it’s a little romantic, but every day? I mean, it’s got to be depressing. You look outside, there’s no traffic, and everyone’s asleep.

GEORGE: Love it. I cannot work until Hilly goes to sleep.

HILLY: I’m gone all day!

GEORGE: Right, but I work better at night. I’m not trying to imply anything, I’m wondering: Have you ever had any patients, married couples—there’s this new thing I read about in Newsweek called "living apart, together."

DR. SELMAN: I didn’t realize that you had a wedding.

GEORGE: Well, it’s apparently a trend. Not that I want to "live apart, together" with Hilly. But I’m just curious.

HILLY: I think it would be wonderful. If we were in the same building, upstairs and downstairs from each other.

DR. SELMAN: I think if that’s what you wanted, that would be perfectly reasonable. But it seems like what you’re saying here—I mean you threw this wonderful party for George and he almost had a panic attack
. It doesn’t sound like he had as good a time as he might have had.

GEORGE: Oh, I did. Not at first because I was so spooked. It’s scary to have 50 people moving toward you in any context.

DR. SELMAN: She told a story about the party, and you said that you felt like a pig shat in your head.

GEORGE: That’s today. The party was so great—did I have a good time that night?

HILLY: Oh, he really had a great time.

DR. SELMAN: I guess I’m just trying to tease out here whether or not you could benefit from an antidepressant. We’re looking at symptoms of depression here.

GEORGE: Could I take Prozac?

DR. SELMAN: There are newer drugs.

GEORGE: But that seems like the big one.

DR. SELMAN: It’s actually probably one of the less safe ones.

GEORGE: Oh, yeah, Abbie Hoffman killed himself. People get homicidal. Don’t people freak out and snap?

DR. SELMAN: Prozac is not a particularly good antidepressant. People associate it with being an antidepressant because that was its first indication—all of the SSRIs are not really great antidepressants. They’re great for other things. They are good for obsessive-compulsive disorder, panic attacks, bulimia and eating disorders. But as far as antidepressants go, all of those same drugs are not the greatest. The best antidepressants are the group of SNRIs. So you have Effexor XR which we have talked about … and now there’s a new one out called Pristiq. It’s made by Wyeth, the same company that came out with Effexor.

GEORGE: O.K.

DR. SELMAN: So I would recommend that you try that. I have samples I could give you.

GEORGE: I wish you could give me some medical marijuana. I don’t approve of marijuana use for pretty everyone except for me. I really don’t like people advocating it, singing its praises in Hollywood, in print, calling it "the weed of wisdom." But could you give me some? You’re not allowed to do that, are you?

DR. SELMAN: Right. It’s not legal.

GEORGE: What I like to do is every three or four months, get a nice $100 container and do tiny bits and make it last a few months.

DR. SELMAN: Getting busted is very expensive.

GEORGE: I feel so sorry for Tatum O’Neal.

DR. SELMAN: I really don’t recommend it.

GEORGE: You know what really works as an antidepressant, and I’m not changing the subject? We watched the first two seasons of Friday Night Lights in like four days. Wasn’t that great? If NBC canceled that show, I may snap.

HILLY: There’s something very comforting about that show. It feels like you’re taking a step back in time, to a time or a place where people still have values that we were brought up with.

DR. SELMAN: Do you want to try the antidepressant?

GEORGE: Yes, definitely.

DR. SELMAN: Are you O.K. with him taking this?

HILLY: I’m O.K. if he wants to take it, but I just think that it seems to me like it would be extremely important for him to keep this private. As something between you and me and anyone else close to him, but I don’t think that you should write about it, at least for the first month.

GEORGE: I’m not the slightest bit embarrassed about that kind of thing.

HILLY: I can imagine people sending e-mails—I mean, people can get very political, and enraged about antidepressants. Another thing that has been causing him unhappiness is that you think that you’re overweight.

GEORGE: I have a double chin and tummy rolls. No man boobs yet, but I’m working on it.

HILLY: He gets very upset about it, but then almost with a drop of a hat he’ll immediately almost want to turn to food for comfort—that’s rich coming from me because we all know what I go to.

GEORGE: I’m really into carbs.

HILLY: Well, for the most part you’re a pretty healthy eater, and I think that people’s body chemistry changes, and I think because you’re so stationary most of the day and then these late-night eating binges—

GEORGE: Macaroni salad, mashed potatoes, cheese, mac and cheese, pasta, ice cream, beer—

HILLY: I’m bringing it up because I know that some of these medications sometimes have effects one way or the other—

GEORGE: Oooh, so I could put on 30 pounds, maybe get up to 250? That’ll be great for my appearance.

DR. SELMAN: I wouldn’t expect you to gain weight on it.

GEORGE: If I put on 20 to 30 pounds, it may achieve its opposite effect and I become really miserable and I won’t be able do my job. I mean, to do my job, I have to go to parties and talk to people and be charming. So if I’m a blimp—

HILLY: No, it seems to me that if the medication works, it would mean the opposite, because you’d feel less depressed and more pliant and more—

DR. SELMAN: And more motivated. Maybe more awake. Maybe get into a better sleep-wake cycle. Maybe clean your apartment.

GEORGE: Maybe I will keep this a secret. No one has to know, right? Been playing a lot of tennis, haven’t we?

HILLY: I have been since January because I’ve been trying to get to a point where I’m good enough so I can play with George and it’s actually fun for us. Instead of him having to spend the whole time teaching me. He’s just such a good teacher. Talk about the opposite of selfish.

GEORGE: Sometimes she’s afraid of the ball, so what I did is, I got right in front of the ball machine, got down on my knees and let the ball hit me in the groin.

DR. SELMAN: It seems like moving to Roosevelt Island was a big upgrade.

GEORGE: I come into Manhattan every three days, and it’s such a culture shock. The other day I couldn’t believe all the people, and someone walked by me on his cell phone jabbering away like an idiot, like a savage beast, and it’s like, I can’t believe I used to live there. They should make more islands around Manhattan. Can’t you make islands these days? Don’t they do that in Dubai? They should make another 20 Roosevelt Islands around Manhattan. Watch someone steal this idea and make trillions.

HILLY: One of the things that I love about Roosevelt Island is coming home after a long day of work and to have—

DR. SELMAN: And to have the apartment a mess and George in his pajamas.

GEORGE: I guess one of my biggest problem is, I don’t have a social life there. Really wish I knew a couple people I can say hi to, even the local pot dealer—then I’ve got someone to say hi to.

HILLY: Why don’t you put a notice up, on the message board?

GEORGE: Just say, ‘I’m lonely, need a pal’?

HILLY: Just be like, ‘I work at home, I’m looking for someone who would be willing to play the occasional spur-of-the-moment tennis or pool.’ What’s wrong with that? Oh, another thing, his brother’s documentary came out; it’s about [the bar] Siberia.

DR. SELMAN: Did they have many scenes of throwing drinks around or getting hit with a chair?

GEORGE: There’s a nice shot of me firing up a bowl, acting like a jackass. It’s riveting. Even if you’re not an insider. I think it’s going to hit the film festivals.

DR. SELMAN: If you can get me a DVD, I’d love to see it. Let me give you the medication. Do you want some more Adderall? I can give you that, too.

GEORGE: And maybe some Viagra?

DR. SELMAN: All right.

George gave us a few bits of wit and wisdom from his interview, while the television is going wild about the beminiskirted babe.

On how much blame Bill Clinton deserves for the terrorist attacks of 9/11:

A lot. Jimmy Carter got the whole thing started, Bill Clinton let it build, build, build, build, build. He wouldn't deal with it, because he had no credibility on deploying the military. He was a pot smoking draft dodger, and so when he was presented with credible evidence that this or that country was behind a terrorist attack, he’d just have to look the other way: “No, don't let me hear that. Call in Monica!”

On women:

If we took away women's right to vote, we'd never have to worry about another Democrat president. It's kind of a pipe dream, it's a personal fantasy of mine, but I don't think it's going to happen. And it is a good way of making the point that women are voting so stupidly, at least single women.

It also makes the point, it is kind of embarrassing, the Democratic Party ought to be hanging its head in shame, that it has so much difficulty getting men to vote for it. I mean, you do see it’s the party of women and 'We’ll pay for health care and tuition and day care -- and here, what else can we give you, soccer moms?'

On why global warming is religion on the left:

Because we can't prove them wrong for a thousand years, and I think the other thing about it is, it goes back to Chesterton’s statement: that when people stop believing in God, the problem isn't that they believe in nothing, it's that they'll believe anything. And that's what you constantly see with people who don't believe in God: They're always imitating the most ridiculous, primitive religions. And it is like a primitive religion, thinking if we just change these lightbulbs, we can change the temperature of the ocean. It's the craziest thing! Even primitive people wouldn't believe something that silly.

To the editor:

I am a 29-year-old Army officer serving my second tour in Iraq; the first was in Baghdad, my most recent takes me further north to Mosul. On an otherwise uneventful day, I happened across George Gurley’s article “Bungalowing Iraq” online [The New York World, Feb. 19, 2007]. I write to you tonight not with any sense of animosity or anger, but a sense of enjoyment and confusion that a war that has taken up such a large part of my life—and an ever-increasing number of my comrades’—has little or no impact on so many in America. Whenever I’m in the United States, I have noticed a growing sense of disconnection—greater than the now-growing discontent—amongst my friends and family and the majority of Americans I meet. Mr. Gurley has captured that disconnection with a sense of the ironic and a wit that I have thoroughly enjoyed. I want to thank him not only for his observations, but also for simply showing up to ask the question. It’s Friday night here in Mosul, and between the mortar attacks and I.E.D.’s, I hope to take some time and watch a movie, read a book or call home—none of which are “normal” Friday-night activities for my peers. Regardless of what happens, know that Mr. Gurley’s article has made this a noteworthy day. Please keep up the good work and, when I come back to N.Y.C. to visit friends, maybe he can ask me about Iraq if I ever make it to Bungalow 8. I will be the guy who isn’t drinking the $350 vodka.

Derek Bennett

Mosul, Iraq

To the editor:

I just read Mr. Gurley’s article about Iraq while serving in Iraq. It gave me a chuckle. Too bad we have not managed to mobilize a nation. Thanks for doing it. I hope you plan a sequel or update at some point.

Maj. G. Joseph Kopser Jr.

Mosul, Iraq

Love the New Look

To the editor:

Let the word go forth from this time and space, to print media and Internet alike, that the torch of journalistic integrity has passed from venerable broadsheet to innovative tabloid. Yet The New York Observer remains Gotham’s superlative paper of rectitude and discovery.

Indeed, the inaugural edition (Feb. 19, 2007) of the redesigned newspaper was a triumph. From Nicholas Von Hoffman’s incisive take on George W. Bush’s sub rosa plans for an Osirak-style bombardment of Iran—and Hillary Rodham Clinton’s interest-group-driven complicity—to the subversively skewed comics of Drew Friedman and K. Bidus (can William Bendix sightings be far behind?), The New York Observer offers readers first-rate reportage, informed opinion and cant-free political analysis.

In an age of public corruption, corporate malfeasance and constitutional breakdown, The Observer boldly answers Juvenal’s timeless query: Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? (Who watches the watchmen?)

Rosario A. Iaconis

Mineola, N.Y.

Spitzer Tzu?

To the editor:

“Gov. Spitzer: Don’t Get Even, Get Humble” [Editorial, Feb. 19, 2007] mischaracterizes the opportunity the Governor has and his tactics. He was elected because of his independent positions regarding the status quo in Wall Street, the insurance industry and other areas. His success as State Attorney General made the voters take him seriously as Governor. Albany needs help, and confrontation may be the only way to accomplish the goal of reviving the Legislature. What looks like revenge may simply be the tactics necessary to make reform real.

Steven A. Ludsin

East Hampton, N.Y.

Truth as Collateral Damage

To the editor:

Joe Conason is right that George W. Bush and Dick Cheney should come clean about their role in outing Valerie Plame, but it’s unlikely they ever will [“Bush and Cheney Must Come Clean,” Feb. 12, 2007]. Clearly, they believe being in power means never having to say you’re sorry, which is the least they could have done when confronted in the first place. No doubt the reason that Patrick Fitzgerald chose not to charge anyone—using the arcane statute covering the disclosure of classified information to inappropriate sources instead—has to do with the difficulty of proving intent. With the Bush administration, the intent is always to do what it wants whenever it wants at whatever the cost, while whoever or whatever gets in the way—including whole populations—is seen as necessary collateral damage.

Lynn Geller

Manhattan

To the Editor:

Re Rebecca Dana’s NYTV column “Good Night, ABC! TV Tabloid Empress Packs Up and Leaves” [Dec. 11]: I was the first prosecutor on the Menendez trial.

After my refusing to talk to Ms. Ross during the trial, we became fast friends afterward. I generally despise the media, and therefore its members, but for Shelley I’ve made an exception. Ms. Dana’s article was a bit snarky, and I’d just like to add some comments from another ambitious, bitchy female (me).

Shelley has humanity, a rare quality in today’s world. She is also the smartest woman I have ever known, and her intelligence is only surpassed by some professors I met in college. She is a tireless worker and utterly devoted to those she considers worthwhile—she was very loyal to Diane Sawyer even as the knife was being withdrawn from her back. Ms. Dana’s article makes her sound frivolous, which she is not, and cold, which she is not. Hopefully, your readers will consider both sides of her.

Pamela Bozanich

Los Angeles

Charlotte Bocly’s Mother Responds

To the Editor:

Warning: Don’t get “Gurleyed.”

When George Gurley approached Charlotte for a possible article, she was obviously flattered [“I Am Charlotte Bocly,” Oct. 23]. After a year of teenage ups and downs, I thought it would boost her morale and renew her confidence.

She blabbed as if Mr. Gurley were an intimate friend, with no idea that he would exaggerate facts, pry for details, divulge personal nonsense or put words into her mouth. She and her family feel betrayed.

Ascribing her no qualities in the article, Mr. Gurley could have mentioned, for example, that she is fluent in four languages, does not say “like” every other word, has worked as a waitress and hostess in restaurants, taught English to foreign children, given chess lessons at a local library, was on the Lycée Français basketball team or won medals in Swiss ski races. I also wish to add that she rarely hangs out in nightclubs and usually has dinner with her family.

Mr. Gurley, has anyone congratulated you on your article? Do you believe your piece is a specimen of fine writing? Is taking advantage of a naïve, albeit privileged, young girl an example of good journalism?

I am sorry you dashed her hopes and turned an interesting project into a search for cheap thrills. She is not at all the kind of person you wrote about.

I thought journalism was a noble profession. I still do. But not in this case. Charlotte learned the hard way. I would like to warn your next victim to beware of being “Gurleyed.”

Marisol de La Bégassière Bocly

Manhattan

Bald Eagle

To the Editor:

Like the Marquis de Sade, we are all prisoners of our compulsions, but the compulsion to eradicate one of the sexiest features of the human body, pubic hair, is beyond me [“You’ll Know It When You See It,” Richard Brookhiser, The National Observer, Dec. 4]. On the occasions I’ve had to shave mine (e.g., vasectomy), I thought how like an ugly turkey neck it looked, and a bald vulva looks like the rest of the bird, turned the other way around.

Pornographers of the world, bring back the fuzzy!

George Winship

Cedar Grove, N.J.

Pulling Out

To the Editor:

I recently read Richard Brookhiser’s article, “Finding New Ways to Confront Old Woes” [The National Observer], which appeared in the Nov. 20 edition of The New York Observer. Mr. Brookhiser’s predictions on the future of the Iraq War may or may not prove to be accurate. I believe, however, that his recollection relating to America’s involvement in Vietnam—in which we ultimately followed George McGovern’s advice during the war to “come home”—may not be accurate.

Mr. Brookhiser suggests that our not staying the course in Vietnam caused Cambodia to be “filled with skulls.” My recollection is that we had over 500,000 troops in Vietnam, some portion of which remained there for over seven years. I recall that Cambodia was a relatively stable country ruled by the popular, saxophone-playing Prince Sihanouk, until President Nixon and Henry Kissinger decided to expand the war to include that country. But perhaps Mr. Brookhiser’s recollection is better than mine.

Barry Feiner

Harrison, N.Y.

In light of other publications' recent instructions about office dress code, we thought it was time for our own in-house reminder about appropriate attire.

Lady reporters, as per the recent slew of gossip-girl-about-town "novels," are required to wear 2.5+ inch bitch heels and a constant air of anxiety and lustiness mixed with exasperation. (Yoga mats are optional attire.) Male reporters are required to wear something horribly pleated up front, the scent of bourbon, and must also wear tidy sweater vests and "unusual" blazers, just this side of professorial.

Male and female editors both are permitted to bare midriffs, intentionally or otherwise. Male editors must shave at least once per month.

The web editor is instructed to wear a white belt at all times; also, a t-shirt promoting a band that is based in Brooklyn which was purchased at a concert in 2002 or 2003, New York's "irony is dead, no really, Graydon Carter said so" years.

White pants on Fridays are mandatory, with flesh-toned thongs or underwear beneath. Your amount of muffintop-overspill is at your discretion.

George Gurley is required to wear human shoes in the office.

The editor-in-chief must wear khaki pants and should decorate his blue button-down with no fewer than two coffee stains each day.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.