'Up All Night'

Sure, 30 Rock and Parks and Recreation suck up all the critics' ink and The Office (somehow, still) gets the most viewers. But the youngest show on the lineup, Up All Night, has distinguished itself too this season, if only as a program worthy of joining the most beloved comedies on the air. It had some turbulent times at the beginning of this season--Up All Night had definitely not decided if it were to be a workplace comedy or a family comedy--and still has some tonal shifts. The best decision the writers made, in fact, was to ever-so-slightly downshift the baby keeping the central couple up all night, so the overwhelming screen presence of Maya Rudolph doesn't overwhelm the rest of the series when she shows up as harried mom Christina Applegate's boss. Discussing a show solely in terms of its improvement since its pilot seems somehow churlish, so we'll note that none of its jokes are super-showy, Up All Night has plenty going for it in terms of subtle chuckles, and its characters are the "realest" among NBC's Thursday comedies--even Maya Rudolph's narcissistic talk-show host.

Set your DVR for NBC at 9:30pm.

Since no thought has been wasted on plot, narrative coherence, character development, direction, acting, technical artistry or anything that might pass for intelligence, I don't see much point in discussing any aspect of this stinker in depth. The basics are simple-mindedly simple. Rick (gap-toothed, broken-nosed Owen Wilson) and his best friend, Fred (Jason Sudeikis, another in a stampede of Saturday Night Live refugees dementedly suffering from Will Ferrell envy), are two aging dweebs who never quite mastered toilet training. If the kingdom of marriage is ruled by betrayal, deception, anxiety and the seven-year itch, these two knobs are crown princes. When they say, "I may be committed but I'm not dead," they mean it. A ball game in the park is a "buffet of ass." Their lives are so deadly that a big evening out is Kathy Griffin tickets. So along comes expert relationship counselor Joy Behar (say what?), who advises the wives to give their husbands a "hall pass"--in normal Webster's grammar, a week's vacation from marriage vows with no strings attached. For these sex-obsessed "horny bobble heads," this is like giving a miniature chihuahua a 5-pound box of fudge--which would undoubtedly be more fun and less homicidal than anything in Hall Pass.

At first it seems like Horny Dog Heaven. But whereas the wives (Jenna Fischer and Christina Applegate) head for Cape Cod, the guys turn out to be such losers they don't do anything but play video games. (They're so hopeless at sex that they think the place to go to meet sluts is Applebee's.) After moving to the sleazy Comfy Nite Inn, Rick tries to pick up bimbos with lines like "You must be from Ireland, because when I look at you, my penis is Dublin"; Fred spends most of his time masturbating in parked cars. The Farrellys' continuing obsession with defecation runs amok; so many scenes literally focus on close-ups of the S-word that if you don't close your eyes to keep from retching, you're a tougher man than I, Gunga Din. When Fred brings home a trashy date with diarrhea that explodes all over the white walls, Hall Pass breaks the Disgust Meter. While Rick races to Cape Cod to rescue his wife, who has been humping a baseball player years younger than she is, Fred ends up with Rick's baby sitter's aunt, who turns out to be the mother of a gun-wielding mentally defective disc jockey.

But enough. Full-frontal nudity, homophobia, rampant put-downs of women, endless toilet scenes and dialogue you wouldn't find even in back issues of the old Screw magazine make Hall Pass not only disgusting and unendurable, but filthy and boring, too. While I don't believe there are any grown men, living or dead, who resemble the idiots in this movie, I'm told, to my horror, that there is still an audience that loves to laugh at flatulence, body functions, fluid eliminations and dirt you wouldn't hear on a tramp steamer headed for Devil's Island. Next time you fly, collect some of those barf bags they give away. They come in handy watching movies like Hall Pass. 

rreed@observer.com

Hall Pass

Running time 98 minutes

Written by Peter and Bobby Farrelly with Pete Jones and Kevin Barnett

Directed by Peter and Bobby Farrelly

Starring Owen Wilson, Jason Sudeikis, Christina Applegate, Jenna Fischer

0/4

We've already handicapped the supporting races. Now it's time to look at the lead actresses.

Best Actress, Comedy: Christina Applegate, Samantha Who?; America Ferrara, Ugly Betty; Tina Fey, 30 Rock; Julia-Louise Dreyfus, The New Adventures of Old Christine; Mary-Louise Parker, Weeds

Who we're pulling for: With apologies to the other four nominees, all of whom are deserving of this win, there's only one woman we're going to be pulling for: Tina Fey. What can we say? She's funny, whip-smart and possibly the most endearing actress on television. The best part about Ms. Fey's performance is that it actually got much stronger during season two of 30 Rock. She used to be an expert straight-woman, now she's a legitimate leading lady. Our huge crush on her doesn't hurt, either.

Prediction: The Emmy Awards usually love two things: first time category nominees on new shows and comeback stories that you never thought you'd see. Christina Applegate manages to be both. It also doesn't hurt that she gives a hilarious performance on Samantha Who? We're sure her acceptance speech, after her successful double mastectomy, won't leave a dry eye in the house.

Best Actress, Drama: Glenn Close, Damages; Sally Field, Brothers and Sisters; Mariska Hargitay, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit; Holly Hunter, Saving Grace; Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer

Who we're pulling for: This is a tough category for us to find interest in, because we can't say we're big fans of any of these shows. However, our parents are. And we always hear them talking about Kyra Sedgwick, so we assume she must be good. Since we've liked Ms. Sedgwick from all the way back in Singles, we'll gladly pull for her on Sunday.

Prediction: If Mad Men is the Emmy Awards trendy pick for 2008, than consider Damages its hand-me-down little brother. The critically acclaimed show was lauded for its great performances, notably that of  Glenn Close. And since old favorite Sally Field already won last year, it should be Ms. Close's time to shine. One tip for her: don't say anything about the "Goddamn war."

Tomorrow: the Actors.

MONDAY

Monday’s future just got a little bit bleaker. Dancing With the Stars (ABC)—whose finale last Tuesday earned the network its best ratings on that night in over seven years—cha-cha-cha-ed out of our lives. CBS canceled their December 10^th debates, as the Democratic nominees balked, fearing the bad publicity of a protest by striking news writers. (CBS is hurting: How I Met Your Mother is in repeats, as well as the rest of the network’s sitcoms.) And NBC announced this week that Chuck (NBC, 8 PM) will be replaced by American Gladiators—the original was obviously before its time—on January 7^th.

What’s left? Moving forward, there’s Samantha Who? (ABC, 9 PM) and Notes From the Underbelly (ABC, 10 PM), both of which will certainly benefit from the lack of competition—if no longer from the big Dancing lead-in. Tonight, however, there are two choices: Santa’s Funniest Moments (MyNetworkTV, 8 PM)—hosted by Erik Estrada!—or actor John Cusack on Inside the Actor’s Studio (Bravo, 8 PM).

TUESDAY

CBS has a night fit for the entire family. At eight, the kids get Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. At nine, there’s sexy, grey-haired Mark Harmon on NCIS for mommy (a repeat, though). And at ten, the man of the house can enjoy a bunch of ladies parading around in their underwear in the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show—for, ahem, Christmas present ideas for the wifey.

Perhaps the Sci-Fi channel—with its loyal demographic of virginal geeks—didn’t check the TV listings when it scheduled the finale of its Tin Man mini-series—not to be confused with Barry Levinson’s Tin Men, which also starred Richard Dreyfuss—for the same time as the “fashion show,” or maybe, just maybe the network is vying for that elusive demographic, women. Dreyfuss toplines along with Zooey Deschanel and Alan Cumming in the modern-day re-imagining of L. Frank Baum’s The Wondeful Wizard of Oz­—not be confused with the Broadway musicals Wicked or The Wiz.

WEDNESDAY

At 40, it’s a sad fact that most Hollywood actresses’ careers are over. So, it’s only fitting that AMC would chose to give tribute to Julia Roberts, who just passed the dreaded mark (8 PM). Ironically, the evening will probably boast the youngest audience for the cable channel, which tends to skew AARP. Denzel Washington, George Clooney, Tom Hanks, Marcia Gay Harden, Shirley MacLaine, Dermot Mulroney, and Bruce Willis will be on hand to assure Roberts that she may just be able to find gigs at her ripe old age.

ABC scored big with last week’s Shrek the Halls: 20.83 million people tuned into the movie spin-off. The network, which won November sweeps in the coveted 18-49 demo, is sticking with the Christmas programming with Santa Claus Is Coming to Town (8 PM).

Otherwise, there’s two hours of Deal or No Deal (NBC, 8 PM) or the second episode of Sports Unfiltered With Dennis Miller (8 PM) on Vs., the same network known for showing Ultimate Fighting and classic boxing matches, which prompts the question: if a rant happens on Vs. and nobody hears it ...

THURSDAY

Thursdays are the only night where competition between the networks is still fierce. The only show in repeats is The Office. Tonight, however, two wrenches are to be thrown into the proverbial works: Barbara Walters Special: the 10 Most Fascinating People of 2007 (ABC, 10 PM) and the Top Chef Holiday special (Bravo, 9 PM). The former boasts interviews with Justin Timberlake, Katherine Heigl and Bill Clinton, while the latter features a cook-off between past contestants with the winner taking home $20,000. That’s a whole lotta Le Creuset!

FRIDAY

Everybody loves Music! Everybody loves the movies! Put them together and you have an advertiser’s dream. Cynical, or the very thought process behind the Conde Nast magazine supplement Movies Rock! and the CBS special of the same name (9 PM)? Decide while watching Elton John, Beyoncé, Queen Latifah, Jennifer Lopez, and plenty of other aspiring singer/actors, duke it out for best over-emoter.

The Boston Red Sox will take on the Cleveland Indians (8:00 PM, Fox) on Tuesday night, destroying the night for House fans (Who will win the competition to be House’s new coterie? I wonder if one of them will be the hot chick from the OC that kissed Mischa Barton. Hmm …) opening the door for ABC’s revamped Tuesday night lineup. This would all be good news for their two new comedies, Cavemen and Carpoolers, if Larry Craig wasn’t going to be playing footsie with Matt Lauer on Dateline (8:00 PM, NBC).

Oh, Mandy! Since Mr. Patinkin left Criminal Minds Wednesdays just haven’t been the same. They’re better! CW just firmed up its Wednesdays by ordering a full season of its breakout hit Gossip Girl (9 PM, CW). With its America’s Next Top Model lead-in, the network finally has one solid night of TV. But the strongest Wednesday night line-up has to go to ABC, whose Pushing Daisies (8 PM, ABC) attracted 13 million viewers for its premiere and Grey’s Anatomy spin-off, Private Practice (9 PM, ABC), has the top ratings for a new show. Gordon Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares (9 PM, Fox) and Bionic Woman (9 PM, NBC) fight over the leftovers.

CBS plans on going after the only soft spot in the highly competitive Thursday night network line-ups with Viva, Laughlin (10 PM, CBS), an adaptation of the immensely popular British show Viva, Blackpool. Executive produced in part by Hugh Jackman, it’s a crime/drama/musical hybrid. (Yes, you read the correctly: musical.) Reviews have been mixed, to say the least. While many are happy to give CBS credit for not just making another CSI spin-off, they are not quite so forgiving when it comes to their enjoyment of it, or lack thereof.

And Women’s Murder Club (9 PM, ABC) is the new queen of Friday nights, beating out Friday Night Lights (9 PM, NBC), which has the more appropriate title, but less of the market share. This week’s episode of the Angie Harmon vehicle features murder and mayhem on the Subway. Yay!

Former New York Times executive editor Howell Raines--who was forced out of paper after the Jayson Blair debacle--is now getting out of the West Village, too (and, as far as we can tell, out of New York City entirely).

Mr. Raines recently sold his West 11th Street townhouse for $3.5 million, according to city deed-transfer records.

Mr. Raines--who purchased the house in 1996--has been renting it out for some time, while spending his days in his Pennsylvania country house.

Last May, actress Christina Applegate reportedly rented the 18-foot-wide townhouse while performing on Broadway.

Mr. Raines hadn't yet responded to an email asking about the sale, as of this posting.

- Michael Calderone

Unless they aren't richly deserved. But let's not go into The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee quite so soon. It would spoil the atmosphere. Juth becauth it's a childlike muthical lithping its way to thuctheth. Personally, I still haven't got over its cute little girl played by an adult actress in fierce pigtails who can spell "thithtitith."

Nevertheless, I wish all the winners well. True, the televised Tonys have never been quite as glamorous as the Oscars. But watch out for a glimpse of Mayor Dinkins on the red carpet. Here are my tips for the major categories in the 2005 Tony Awards, being shown on CBS on June 5 at 8 p.m. And the envelope, please!

Though I prefer Martin McDonagh's weirdly disturbing The Pillowman, and some think it will take the Tony for Best Play, the winner will be John Patrick Shanley's Doubt. The gifted Mr. Shanley has had a wonderfully productive season, and the play has already won this year's Pulitzer. My doubts about Doubt when I reviewed it were that its outcome is never really in doubt. Mr. Shanley's unstoppably righteous nun fixes the truth about the priest she suspects is molesting a choirboy. Faith, the message appears to be, requires no evidence. Maybe so. Absolutely no doubt, however, that Mr. Shanley will take home the Tony.

This isn't going to be The Pillowman's night. I expect Doug Hughes of Doubt to win Best Director. But what odds as Best Actress on Doubt's Cherry Jones versus Kathleen Turner of Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf? It's almost too close to call.

The Best Actress category is already fierce enough, with Laura Linney ( Sight Unseen) and Mary-Louise Parker ( Reckless) also nominated. Ms. Jones is a critics' darling, giving a flawless performance as the nun lying to herself in righteous certitude. But Ms. Turner as Edward Albee's mythic man-eater drinking herself into goading oblivion has been almost unanimously raved over. Hmm … Ms. Turner's unafraid, unembarrassed performance is the more challenging role. But my hunch is the Tony will go to Cherry Jones.

The category for Best Actor in a Play includes such brilliant actors as Brian F. O'Byrne for his dedicated priest under suspicion in Doubt and Billy Crudup's amateur storyteller on nightmare trial for his life in Pillowman. But the sentimental favorite, James Earl Jones as crusty old Norman Thayer in musty old On Golden Pond, will win.

Look at the nominees for Featured Actor in a Play! Three of the five are from the terrific all-male ensemble of David Mamet's Glengarry Glen Ross-Alan Alda, Liev Schreiber and Gordon Clapp. I think Mr. Alda's washed-up salesman begging for his livelihood could just about win, but the split vote hands an opportunity to the excellent Michael Stuhlbarg of The Pillowman.

The melodramatic Roundabout production of Twelve Angry Men was peculiarly popular. But the Tony of Best Play Revival ought to go to Glengarry Glen Ross, which actually gives revivals a good name.

Best Musical is between the underdog Spelling Bee versus the big rich guy, Monty Python's Spamalot. The innate English dopiness of Spamalot is far superior to the manufactured American dopiness of another nominee, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. The Italianate musical The Light in the Piazza is much too serious at this level, although its old-fashioned theme about a retarded American girl who falls for a gorgeous Italian in Florence is come se dice-'ow you sayz?-lika beega pizza pie. The whole world loves an underdog, or a puppet, as last year's surprise Best Musical, Avenue Q, proves. Cute lispers or the rampant joys of English schoolboy silliness? Monty Python's Spamalot takes the Tony.

Mike Nichols-for it is he-wins so many awards they should ban him from all awards ceremonies, except as a presenter. If necessary, he could present himself with another Lifetime Achievement Award. Mr. Nichols of Spamalot will surely win for Best Director of a Musical.

I think Eric Idle of Spamalot will win for Best Book of a Musical. None of the four nominations for Best Original Score, however, are exactly "original": They're derivative or pastiche. Adam Guettel's Sondheimean Light in the Piazza is the most original of the bunch. But I think Spamalot will be on a roll and the Tony will go to John Du Prez and Eric Idle.

The neophyte Christina Applegate of Sweet Charity has achieved a dogged miracle by receiving a nomination for Best Actress in a Musical, and some showbiz sentimentalists, including Ms. Applegate, are hoping her dream will come true. Sherie René Scott is great fun in Rotten Scoundrels. The winner will be Victoria Clark for her outstandingly dignified performance in The Light in the Piazza.

Best Actor in a Musical is a tougher choice. Hank Azaria and Tim Curry of Spamalot are both very appealing, but they split their votes. Gary Beach wasn't universally admired in the revival of La Cage aux Folles. Nor was the mannered John Lithgow in Rotten Scoundrels. Norbert Leo Butz of Rotten Scoundrels gave one of the most over-the-top performances I've seen in a musical, or anywhere, and Mr. Butz will win.

I see that along with three other solo shows, Billy Crystal's 700 Sundays has been nominated for a Tony for Special Theatrical Event. And the winner is … Mario Cantone for Laugh Whore!

But don't bet on it. Still, Mr. Cantone will be there proudly in his tux just the same. It's good, of course, that Edward Albee will receive a Lifetime Achievement Award. (What kept them?) But I'm particularly thrilled that a Tony for Regional Theater is going to one of the finest troupes in America, the Theatre de la Jeune Lune of Minneapolis.

A decade or more ago, I caught a masterpiece of theirs on tour in Los Angeles. Their stage version of Marcel Carne's Children of Paradise counts vividly as among the best experiences of my theatergoing life. And I remember how, at the end of the performance, the cast members lined up as mere mortals and innocents in the foyer to shake our hands, if that's what we wanted to do. I was so thankful I embraced them, and wrote about their astonishing achievement, and for the only time in my life I pleaded with theater producers here to bring a great production to New York.

Well, they're here at last! Perhaps the Theatre de la Jeune Lune no longer performs their Children of Paradise. It seems like a fantastic dream now. But in theater, it's never too late to make amends, never too late to give thanks for work so wonderfully done.