Okay, so technically this movie is called True Story, but the synopsis, via Craigslist’s P/T paid gigs pages, reads like it was torn from the Capote non-fiction novel:
SYNOPSIS: STORY OF A JOURNALISTS’ RELATIONSHIP WITH A MOST WANTED MURDERER AND A CASE OF STOLEN IDENTITY.
Short. Brief. Succinct. To the point. And more adjectives! (We wonder if Mr. Franco himself wrote the entry?)
I’m not sure if we have a term in the English language for something like the singularity, except it happens when Craigslist ads for reality shows based on better scripted programs become self-aware, but if we did, the world we lived in would be even sadder. (Presumably because that means this phenomenon happened enough to deserve its own entry in Webster’s.)
So just be glad that the Emmy-Award winning producers behind this new program about Brooklyn/downtown Manhattan hipsters 20-somethings who are trying to figure it all out can only have the one reference like this:
You know how much we love Missed Connections. It’s our favorite part of Craigslist; displaying the entire spectrum of the world’s sorrow and pity (and schadenfreude). See: Missed Connections during a hurricane, from Patrick Bateman: Investment Banker, Missed Connections that aren’t even real Missed Connections at all.
But even reeking with desperation, Missed Connections always knew what it was: A place to post your creepy stalker love letters to other random faces in the crowd. Until now.
Ladies, we know how hard it is to get work out there these days. All the secretary pools are overstocked, and now that the war is over, the men have taken back all the canning jobs at the factories. Sometimes it’s enough to make you want to start an all female baseball team, which a gruff Tom Hanks could manage and tell you when it is and is not an appropriate time to cry.
But, women, we implore you: No matter how desperate you are, don’t go taking every two-bit dancing/bartending job listed on Craigslist. No matter how enticing the advertisement may look, it’s always a good rule of thumb that if someone can’t be bothered to Google the spelling of their favorite movie of all time, they will not be able to pay you in anything other than sweaty dollar bills stuffed into your thong.
We mean, we hope we are misreading this listing under the “barter” section, but we’re pretty sure that this Rockland County family is basically advertising their need for a slave. Or maybe an old-timey hobo? We don’t know, you decide.
Fun With Craigslist
Look, no funny business: This is just a girl MFA student with a mustache, standing in front of
a boy all of Craigslist’s barter section, asking for him to love her a chance to make some breakfast/artist talk.
Full ad below.
The star of FX’s Louie—widely considered to be the comedian of the moment— Louis C.K. is a tough ticket these days, especially for New Yorkers, whose venues are almost never big enough to accommodate either the sold-out crowds or the greedy hands of ticket scalpers. This principle was demonstrated to especially pronounced effect earlier today, when Brooklyn venue The Bell House announced that he would be testing out an hour of new material tonight. Not just for one show, but three separate shows.
Three separate shows that have since sold out and infuriated people.
Some are pulling for the dismissal of the somewhat sexist Civic Virtue, but an immigrant group in Queens is defending the bare-bottomed statue in the name of its Italian-American heritage.
The Piccirilli Brothers, a New York City-based Italian group who has worked on various monuments erected throughout the country, apparently collaborated back in the day with Frederick MacMonnies, the sculptor of Civic Virtue, according to the blog Queens Crap.
Rebecca Land Soodak has to take certain precautions when seeking a nanny to look after her four children. For one, she has to be careful not to include her name or email address in her Craigslist posting.
“I don’t want them to Google me until we’ve talked on the phone,” Ms. Land Soodak told The Observer on a recent Wednesday morning at her home on East 87th Street. The kids were at school, and the penthouse duplex, its walls lined with her own paintings—colorful, Elizabeth Peyton-style portraits of children with dreamy gazes—was quiet.
“And they always Google,” she said.
What’s a better way to blow the last few thousands of your Wall Street bonus than on a prostitute?
The market is shriveling up, however. In recent months, The NYPD has made some strong sweeps in removing high profile prostitutes off the streets. Well, out of their apartments—no one actually walks the streets anymore thanks to Craiglist and Rentboy.com.
But some of their apartments are a bit iffy.