Lara Spencer apologizes for any confusion about reality of magical elf

Good Morning America isn't the first news program that has had to apologize for a factual story and replace it with some implausible copy, but last week proved that they might be the silliest. During Lara Spencer's segment on this season's hot new toy, Elf on the Shelf, she inadvertently let it slip that although it is not supposed to be touched by children after they "adopt him" (because giving him a Christian name infuses him with magical powers that are taken away if he is played with), he doesn't actually go to the North Pole and visit Santa Claus. Rather, her film crew showed parents moving the doll, and in one instance, Spencer actually picked up the toy herself.

Of course, this is the biggest scandal since the Killian Documents, as far as The New York Post is concerned.

"GMA Kills Christmas Magic After Elf on the Shelf Segment" read the skybox on the top of the Post's page this morning, which pointed to several Facebook wall rants that angry, illiterate adults posted on GMA's page. Stuff like "“THANKS A LOT U MORONS!!!!,” and "My kid ran upstairs this morning saying the elf on the shelf isn’t real and that parents hide it in the middle of the night!!! I’M PISSED!"

Which, fair enough, but maybe you shouldn't let your kids watch the news first thing in the morning if you're still not comfortable with bursting the bubble on Santa? What about when they accidentally catch George Stephanopoulos and Brian Ross reporting on the Colorado movie shootings or develop a phobia of Bouncy Castles or Sea World? Would you call the show "U MORONS!!" for reporting on the news? Something tells us you'll have a lot more explaining to do, and maybe just sit around with your kid if you plan to watch programs that involve journalism as well as pie-baking tips?

(And this is a minor quibble, but there are definitely more entertaining shows to plop your toddler in front of in the mornings...okay, maybe not Sesame Street right now, but how about some Nick Jr.?)

In any case, the next day Ms. Spencer went back on air and apologized for the misunderstanding, explaining that since she hadn't named her Elf during the first segment, it hadn't been given its magical powers yet and could therefore be manhandled with abandon.

http://youtu.be/AmHmxUMYCVU

Next year, we assume GMA will just stick to their regularly scheduled programming of reporting on "Hunky Santa."

Olivier Nakache, Meryl Streep, Omar Sy, Eric Toledano and Mr. Weinstein.

As we walked out of Cipriani 55 on Wednesday, we were overwhelmed with confusion. What had just happened? Smiling, we headed for a cab, trying to piece together some sort of cohesion.

“We are getting people out of wheelchairs and walking," I recalled  Matthew Reeve saying at the beginning of the evening, poised on the red carpet of the Christopher and Dana Reeve Foundation annual Magical Evening. 'That involves fundraising.”

“Its a wonderful chance to celebrate what the organization has accomplished and remind everyone what needs to be done, whilst remembering my father and step mother’s legacy.”

With the evening's noble purpose clearly set in our minds, we were ushered to our tables.

Good Morning America anchors Josh Elliot, Sam Champion and Lara Spencer kicked off the proceedings with a champagne toast. The taste of bubbly fresh on our lips, the presentation of the Christopher Reeve Spirit and Courage award soon followed.  We were inspired by James Dasavano's struggle to reverse his mother’s paralysis, a fete he accomplished with the help of his family and the foundation. Tears almost came to our eyes when we saw his mother walk beside him to the podium.

A little break in the ceremonies gave us time to gather our emotions and tuck into the starter and eyebrow-raising pop performance by Jason Derulo. “I suffered a broken neck when performing a routine back flip tuck preparing for my tour this year. When I heard that they reached out to me I said, 'absolutely.' I had to move a couple things around but I felt like nothing else was more important than this,”  Mr. Derulo told us, honored to participate in the evening.

After dinner we headed over to have a chat with masochistic magician David Blaine. When we got nearer we realized that he was eating glass to the audience of Meryl Streep and Harvey Weinstein. The night was careening into chaos. After Ms. Streep ran away in disgust we asked Mr. Blaine how he came to be involved in the organization.

“Want to see a trick?” he asked.

Please no, not the glass. Mercifully he pulled out a pack of cards and proceeded to perform a whirlwind of card tricks. “You can’t tell anyone about these tricks because they are going to go in my new show," he said as he pulled a folded four of spades from underneath my watch.

We suddenly heard Ms. Streep at the podium, poised beside Mr. Weinstein, the two having escaped Mr. Blaine to present an award to Olivier Nakache and Éric Toledano, the directors of the French box office hit The Intouchables. Ms. Streep almost gave the dagger shaped award to the producer Mr. Weinstein.

“Do I give to you now ... between the eyes?”

Do it Meryl. She didn’t and after a slightly unbelievable story about how he and Johnny Depp were the reason the handicap access bill was passed in the Senate, Mr. Weinstein handed off the award. Omar Sy, the lead in The Intouchables, gave an extremely moving speech which was soon followed by some more pop mayhem in the form of Mr. Derulo’s girlfriend Jordin Sparks. Earlier she had told us that “anytime I can be at a place where people are trying to make a difference or trying to change things I feel super. Christopher Reeve and Dana Reeve are Superman and Superwomen so that is quite fitting.”

Her songs following us, The Observer headed for the door. Before we could exit, however, we were stopped by a camera crew for yet another Jersey reality show as they filmed what appeared to be two very tiny orange people. At that point nothing could surprise us.

Ruh-oh! (ABC)

-Though Mr. Timberlake might be going to the courthouse for something other than a marriage certificate: Britney Spears trial lawyers have brought up her former Mouseketeer co-star and boyfriend as a precipitating cause for her meltdown.

- Tom Hanks dropped a big 'ole F-bomb on Good Morning America, shattering the illusion that he is the celebrity equivalent of Ned Flanders. Even so, how adorable is it that he only curses when doing an impression of a foreign person who uses profanity?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-C2h6JSnM-E

Apparently, Mr. Lauer is trying to fix the show by “basically executive-producing,” berating staff for “not trying hard enough” and not letting anyone even mention Good Morning America. Today is expected to lose out to their ABC rival for the third week in a row.

“Matt’s turned into an anchor animal,” a network source told the Post. “He’s making all editorial decisions, he’s running the show and he’s not listening to anyone . . . it’s a huge problem.”

“Please print this story — it’s the most interesting and dangerous I’ve ever sounded!” Mr. Lauer urged the Post.

We don’t know about Mr. Lauer, but an “anchor animal” doesn’t sound very dangerous to us at all. It sounds more like an impeccably groomed animal that wears a suit, sits behind a desk and alternates between reading the news and chatting with celebrity guests.

Today, which used to own the morning show race, is all set to get beat out by Good Morning America for the third week in a row. Even the Olympics couldn’t save the summer for NBC–ratings were down 7 percent overall.

And ABC is trying to hold on to that boost. Guest stars such as Oprah Winfrey, former Today darling (and currently the host of a syndicated talk show on ABC) Katie Couric, Diane Sawyer and Stephen Colbert are going to guest co-host while Robin Roberts is out getting a bone marrow transplant. Current First Lady Michelle Obama and First Lady hopeful Ann Romney are also both rumored to be in talks to guest host.

Savannah Guthrie, the former NBC legal analyst who replaced Ms. Curry, just can’t compete with that--no matter how many Kris Jenner exclusives she gets.

- Rob Lowe, Stephen Colbert, and the cast of Modern Family will be filling in for Robin Roberts on Good Morning America this week while the ABC host undergoes a bone marrow transplant. Hey, we'd take a soggy piece of bread over last week's substitute, Jessica Simpson.

- Would you like to go bowling with Paul Rudd, Rashida Jones, Denis O'Hare, John Oliver, and not one but two stars of a Law&Order franchise? Of course you do. We don't even need to mention that the whole thing's for charity. You were already sold.

- Candace Bushnell keeps having to resettle the same old lawsuit with former manager (and alleged Stanford inspiration) Clifford Streit. She keeps giving him money for his part in helping her get Sex and the City on HBO, and he keeps telling her its not enough. She should just stop and ask herself, WWCBD?

-Alec Baldwin's dream Portlandia role: "A meat salesman with all kinds of charts and graphs of the loins and the sections of the pig and the cow and the organs." Just no pig, please...we're keeping kosher this week.

Ms. Curry at Cannes.

Today host Ann Curry has hired attorney Robert Barnett to represent her in negotiations with NBC as the network transitions her to a new job within the company, reports The New York Times.

Morning show watchers think Ms. Curry and her recently re-upped co-host Matt Lauer's lack of chemistry has contributed to the longtime front-runner getting beat by rival Good Morning America this spring.

Her most likely replacement is 9 a.m. host Savannah Guthrie, and Ms. Curry is said to be interested in a newsier post, perhaps as a foreign correspondent. Mr. Barnett brokered a similar deal for Christiane Amanpour, who left ABC's The Week and became a "global affairs anchor" at the network, as well as an anchor at CNN.

They say she'll be out by the Olympics.

Katie Couric (Getty Images)

Onetime queen of the morning Katie Couric is reclaiming her throne--for one short week. She'll be guest-hosting Good Morning America for the week beginning April 2, as part of her new utility-player duties at ABC in the leadup to her new chat show, Katie, in the fall.

This comes at a pivotal time for morning news, as Ann Curry reportedly is losing or has lost the esteem of her colleagues at Today (where she occupies Ms. Couric's old seat) and Matt Lauer ponders whether he can get more money elsewhere. A world-beating week for ABC might raise blood pressures among Today producers accustomed to first place.

mchaban [at] observer.com | @MC_NYC

With their father in office, it was Andrew who dropped off Chris at Yale as an undergrad, according to the article, and Chris himself says, "Andrew kind of raised me." But with their fixation on the common good, neither patriarch saw Chris' three-year stint on Good Morning America as a major accomplishment.

"My father struggled with it as a significant form of service," Chris tells me. (Andrew echoed the sentiment: "You got to decide what's more important: your personal celebrity or what you're able to do for other people," Chris recalls him saying.)

This does not make Andrew's fraternal ribbing seem overly good-natured. Especially when discussing how he has changed since his divorce.

Andrew is into personal development, "self-improvement," Chris tells me. ("I think Chris needs a lot of improvement," quips Andrew when I bring it up.)

Zing! Also, poor Chris.