Planes Trains & Automobiles
THERE GOES THE NEIGHBORHOOD
Enough already with the North Brooklyn bellyaching!
That seems to be the message of the MTA, which restored G trains service earlier this morning. Everyone is eagerly awaiting the resumption of the L train between Eighth Avenue and Broadway Junction, everyone meaning the unwashed masses of the city’s hipsters. The L line, which was pumped out yesterday, had the worst flooding of any subway tunnel, according to the MTA, now, to prove just how tirelessly the agency is working to get the L back up and running, here’s a video to show the work going on.
THERE GOES THE NEIGHBORHOOD
BLOG POSTS THAT PRACTICALLY WRITE THEMSELVES
The joke about hipsters (well, one of many, many jokes about hipsters) is that they are pioneers, non-conformists. But out in Bushwick, they are following in the footsteps of more than a hundred of the city’s neighborhoods: they want a rezoning.
A stones throw (not the hip hop record label) from the the McKibben Lofts and Roberta’s, just across Flushing Avenue, a developer wants to transform the old Rheingold Brewery into a 10-building housing complex, a plan that has been kicking around since at least 2008. But according to The Wall Street Journal, this is Bushwick, so the rezoning has to be different, it has to be cool, with it, or at least that’s what Councilwoman Diana Reyna wants.
THE BIKESHARE COMETH!
Yes, we know. It just ended on Sunday. And you already miss it. So we ask, at full volume:
Are you ready for the second season of HBO’s ‘Girls,’ Bob Ross-lookalikes, “Muffle Car”-owners, and unicycling hipsters?
THE HIPPING POINT
When the blue Citibank Citi Bikes—thank you again impossibly selfless, unfailingly generous corporate overlords!—start rolling out of their stations, there is one neighborhood that will not be sharing.
South Williamsburg is noticeably lacking in any of the city’s new bike-share stations, The Wall Street Journal noticed. And this time the Hasidic community didn’t even have to battle against naked hipsters to get their way!
There were so many communities clamoring to host the cruisers, ugly Citibank logos be damned, that the ultra-Orthodox Jewish community simply stayed mum and let the sought-after stations go where they were wanted, the city transportation commissioner explains. And that wasn’t South Williamsburg.
STRAIGHT OUT OF (HIPSTER) CENTRAL CASTING
Rockaway Beach: A well-established Hipster Hamptons of sorts for the last few years, a place many thought would hit fever-pitch sometime this summer, the moment when—like Williamsburg and Bushwick and Red Hook and hell, the rest of the entire borough of Brooklyn before it—well-heeled Manhattanites discover it, and then, ruin the fun for those who were ostensibly there “first.”*
First came The Taco Stand.
Then, the Trend Pieces.
Then, The Hoteliers.
And now: The Page Six Item.
Hipsters on TV
Shooting for the second season of HBO’s generation-defining half-hour-of-power dramedy, Girls—brought to you by an all-star team including the loins of David Mamet, Brian Williams, Laurie Simmons, and Caroll Dunham—is underway. Hooray for everyone!
Man, we really need to watch more early morning Fox News. We almost missed yesterday’s segment from The Five, where former White House Press Secretary Dana Perino had to stop host Eric Bolling (who was ranting about Mark Zuckerburg, consummate hipster) to ask what a hipster was. (Since hipsters can make money now, they are relevant on Fox.)
“Just for asking that, you are a hipster!” the very confused Mr. Bolling crowed, as if accusing Ms. Perino of having cooties.
Insta-Nostalgia (noun): Glorification/yearning of or for a period in history that only recently ended, or is still occurring. Confined mostly to Millennials, hipsters, and Kurt Andersen, symptoms of insta-nostalgia may include anything from ironic Lana Del Rey listening parties to an obsession with Instagram photos.
Brooklyn’s 3rd Ward is a great place to take classes on art, sculpture, and hipsterdom. Where else can you drink PBR while drawing nudes, with the only cost being a basic membership fee of $129 a year (not including classes)?
But in addition to woodworking and jewelry-making, 3rd Ward is now offering a new opportunity for young 20-somethings with too much money and time on their hands: a “Culinary Incubator,” which will teach classes on asking a waiter with the proper amount of condescension: “But were all the ingredients grown locally?”