Mr. Corbat

Vikram Pandit is stepping down as chief executive officer of Citigroup, and the executive who divested the bank's toxic assets in the wake of the financial crisis is moving into the bank's top job.

Citi said in a statement today that Mr. Pandit was resigning and that Michael Corbat, Citi's head for Middle East and Europe, would be the firm's new chief executive. Mr. Corbat, who has worked for Citi or its predecessor firms since graduating from Harvard in 1983, previously ran Citi Holdings, the so-called bad bank formed in the aftermath of the 2008 crisis.

Mr. Pandit's resignation comes one day after Citi announced better-than-expected earnings for the third quarter.

"There is nothing better than our third quarter earnings announcement to demonstrate definitively that we have turned this company around," said in a memo to Citi employees published at StreetInsider. "More importantly, I couldn't be more optimistic about the bank's future. Our formula has served the company well for 200 years. By going back to the basics of banking to serve the real economy, putting clients at the center of everything we do, and embracing the principles of Responsible Finance, we have put Citi in a great position for continued success."

Vikram Pandit came to Citi in 2007, when the bank acquired his hedge fund, Old Lane Partners. According to Bloomberg, Mr. Pandit will have received $261 million in compensation since taking the helm at Citi in 2007, including $165 million he received in the sale of Old Lane.

"This is a complete shock," said "Mad Money" Jim Cramer on CNBC today. "I have no idea what's going on here, and this is major and something is very wrong."

"Pandit's young," Mr. Cramer continued in a clip that can be viewed here. "Pandit's young, people respect Pandit. He's created this terrific team that everyone really respects. The guy inherited a total joke company. It had been destroyed, it had been destroyed and he resurrected it. It is shocking."

Andrew Ross Sorkin says the Facebook executive most responsible for the company's failed initial public offering has largely escaped blame.

A former partner at Dewey & LaBoeuf is suing Citigroup, charging that the lender helped hide the law firm's financial problems.

An Argentinean judge issues an arrest warrant for Credit Suisse exec David Mulford, who's wanted for failing to testify in a probe of the country's 2001 debt default.

Multinationals such as American Express and Spanish bank BBVA are dabbling in venture capital, according to The Times.

Jim Cramer gets better ratings when Mad Money re-airs at 3 a.m. The Post figures drunken traders may be the target audience.

European Central Bank President Mario Draghi, speaking at a closed session of the E.U. parliament, suggested that central bank may start buying government debt maturing inside of three years.

Spain's bank bailout fund will inject $5.7 billion in Bankia.

The French government stepped in to bail out Paris-based Credit Immobilier de France over the weekend; now it says the deal can work without costing the taxpayer.

U.S. firms are planning for a Grexit, according to The Times: "Bank of America Merrill Lynch has looked into filling trucks with cash and sending them over the Greek border so clients can continue to pay local employees and suppliers in the event money is unavailable."

Hello Nast-e, How You Been? In the "great" tradition of The Devil Wears Prada, Erik Maza reports on yet another bit of roman à clef that has emerged from the former innards of Conde Nast. Okay, so: Karl Taro Greenfeld's forthcoming (and very hyped!)  Triburbia isn't exactly mass-market paperback fodder, but there is a bit about a Conde Nast magazine that "didn’t survive very long in the digital age." The context provided and Maza's guesswork lead him (and us) to believe it's based on one Joanne Lipman of long-deceased Portfolio where Greenfield once worked. Portfolio famously blew a bunch of cash and its failure was like a really highbrow and way more expensive version of any one of Radar's three failures with far less drug use and more Michael Lewis and Felix Salmon. Also, Jeff Bercovici will probably never work at Conde Nast again for the wonderful media reporting he did (on Conde Nast; attaboy!) when he was there. Anyway, Maza hysterically called up Joanne Lipman who didn't comment on the book because she hasn't read it, but more importantly, we now know that Lipman is writing a book about her childhood music teacher instead of a Conde Nast tell-all. [Memo Pad / WWD]

Ghostface Dillah! IAC chairman Barry Diller was on the company's earnings call today when Peter Kafka heard him talking crazy-talk: A print-less Newsweek? Never! But: Not entirely unlikely! [All Things D] 

Nahoo: Welcome back to the media headlines for a day, Jamie Mottram, who previously oversaw Yahoo's whole blog experiment thing, who is now going to USA Today's Sports Media Group. Onward and lateral-ward! [Fishbowl NY]

On The Upside, You Get Marion Berry As Your Mayor: Have you thought about leaving New York City for higher ground lately? Tired of the Gotham grind? Well, D.C. news/gossip/scuttlebutt sheet The Hill has released their 50 Most Beautiful People list for this year, and it's as good a argument against it as anything else, especially if you've vaguely considered moving to D.C. (and let's face it: if you in fact have vaguely considered moving there, you deserve whatever fate awaits you). Also, tawdry mid-summer feature experts that we are, could you pick a worse way to shamelessly paginate, as a deterrent to reading through the entire thing? In D.C., no, because everyone there buys into things like this, as opposed to only a fraction of bored New Yorkers when we do them. [The Hill]

Someone Only She Knows: Remember what Maureen Dowd was like when she was an entirely respectable and hard-nosed reporter, before she pioneered the art of the hard-sell headline (long before The Internet—and TimesSelect—was ever a thing)? Of course you don't, because none of us were alive and if we were we didn't know who Maureen Dowd was yet because she was still an entirely respectable and hard-nosed reporter. Well, now you can relive those glory days. The Awl has a feature on it. [The Awl]

Outliars: Did Malcom Gladwell cause the recession? No, but it's fun to imagine him doing so because he once lectured at Lehman Brothers. Also: Wouldn't he just love  that? In even asking the question, Andrew Sullivan gives Malcolm Gladwell way, way, way too much credit today, while Felix Salmon gives him way too much space to defend himself of this accusation. All of which goes without saying: We all know Jim Cramer caused the recession, anyway. [Andrew Sullivan, Felix Salmon]

And The Pulitzer for Pattinson Service Goes To: The most groundbreaking thing happening in journalism today has to do with Kristen Stewart cheating on Robert Pattinson. This is like Watergate (for our angsty teenage cousin). It's literally inescapable on any social media platform right now. Congratulations, US Weekly, you've officially pushed VICE out of the "obligatory esoteric ASME nomination" position for next year's awards. [US Weekly]

Please remember to send your tips, legal threats, pencil sketches of funny dog breeds, and pro-bono accounting advice right here.

Happy Wednesday.

fkamer@observer.com | @weareyourfek

Financial shoutcreature Cramer apparently took umbrage with an arbitrary call-out stemming seemingly from nowhere; a 27 year-old trader named Chris from Bridgewater, New Jersey took a side-shot at Cramer by noting his speculation on the future of Goldman Sachs. Cramer took umbrage with Chris' characterization of Cramer's position, and it all went downhill from there:

And then, finally:

For the record, the Elk's Club can in fact banish people, but not first without a trial. As a reminder, Jim Cramer just threatened to blacklist a 26 year-old trader from Bridgewater, New Jersey from the Elk's Club because he pissed Jim Cramer off on Twitter.

fkamer@observer.com | On Twitter

mtaylor@observer.com

Twitter: @mbrookstaylor

“By the way, that feline whitefish on a bagel, shmeared properly, is not so bad,” said Jim Cramer.

It was the night of Thursday, April 23, and the host of CNBC’s Mad Money was standing on a stage at the front of a ballroom in the New York Hilton, talking about what it was like to eat cat food on TV.

In front of him sat hundreds of guests in black-tie, who had gathered at the FDNY Foundation's annual Humanitarian Awards Dinner to slurp down cocktails, eat steak and raise money for fire-fighting causes in New York City.  

Mr. Cramer was emceeing the event. At a table in the center of the room, not far from the stage, sat Brian Williams, the anchor of NBC’s Nightly News, who was one of the night's honorees. (Big night for Mr. Williams, apparently: He also had a cameo on NBC's 30 Rock.)

Mr. Cramer gave a nod to Mr. Williams and noted that he was "the living embodiment of everything I am not in every single way, except that we’re both on TV at 6:30 p.m."

Mr. Cramer launched into a riff about how the men were different. He noted that Mr. Williams was suave and cool. His tie was always perfectly knotted, and he never seemed to eat cat food or wear a diaper while presenting the news. Mr. Cramer said that recently Mr. Williams had revealed his secret. “He said that he had what’s known as, ‘self-restraint.’” said Mr. Cramer. “Something I instantly had to Google because I’m not in the least bit familiar with the concept.”

The crowd clapped.

Shortly thereafter, Mr. Cramer relinquished the floor to NYC Fire Commissioner Nicholas Scoppetta. Mr. Scoppetta promptly referenced Mr. Cramer’s recent battles with Comedy Central’s Jon Stewart. He joked that earlier in the evening, the fire department had received a call about a fire at a residence. But then en route they had learned that it was Mr. Stewart’s home on fire, and so they turned the trucks around. Mr. Cramer smiled.

An hour or so earlier, the party had kicked off with cocktails and finger foods. Here and there, on the third floor of the New York Hilton, mustachioed men in jackets with FDNY insignia chatted with women in high heels. An ice sculpture bearing the fire-fighting symbols—a pair of flames, a fire hydrant, an axe—sat on a rotating plate, surrounded by pieces of sushi.

Guests mingled. Governor David Paterson shook hands. Potential bidders checked out the goods at a silent auction, which included a mounted fire axe, a silver caviar plate surrounded by shot glasses and framed black-and-white photographs of old fire engines that looked like primitive zambonis.

The wail of bagpipes signaled everyone to take their seats in the ballroom for a three-course dinner. A toy fire truck served as the centerpiece at each table. Dessert eventually arrived in the form of chocolate fire engines stuffed with pink confections.

At around 9 p.m., Mr. Williams took the stage. After thanking the foundation, he began reminiscing about the day he turned 17 in Middletown, New Jersey, and immediately signed up to become a volunteer firefighter. “I served with distinction that has yet to be proven,” joked Mr. Williams.

He gave shout-outs to “all my guys” at the fire house in Middletown, New Jersey, including his first captain. He donned his old fire helmet. And he recalled his captain’s preference for such things as a 1-inch rubber booster line and a high pressure pump, which Mr. Williams described as a “beautiful piece of apparatus.”

“I can’t talk apparatus at most dinner engagements I have in New York,” said Mr. Williams. “But I figured this was the night to whip it out.”

Everyone laughed.

Mr. Williams gave thanks to his wife, Jane Stoddard Williams, who was sitting at a table at the front of the room, and to his colleagues at NBC News, who had turned out to fete their managing editor—a large group, which included NBC News president Steve Capus and Bob Epstein, the executive producer of The Nightly News.

“The first rule when you enter a burning structure, as you know, is look behind you,” said Mr. Williams. “Someone is always supposed to have your back. You’re never supposed to be alone. I never am. This group of people has my back every day.”

Mr. Velshi, CNN's chief business correspondent, was speaking to The Media Mob on Thursday morning about his newly published book, Gimme My Money Back: Your Guide to Beating the Financial Crisis.

Mr. Velshi said that the slim volume—one of the first books out of the gate pegged to the current financial crisis—aims to walk a general audience through the basics of personal finance.

"The first chapter is the history of how we got here," said Mr. Velshi. "That's the timely part of it. The rest of it is a real primer in how markets and investments work."

Not only is the book a quick read, according to Mr. Velshi, but it was also a quick write. The CNN correspondent said that his first meeting about the book with his publisher Sterling & Ross took place on November 5th, the day after the presidential election. Roughly 40 days later, the first printed copy of the book rolled off the presses.

How'd he get it done so fast?

Mr. Velshi credited his editor Tom Wynbrandt, who practically camped out at CNN during November and December, organizing Mr. Velshi's words and passages and combing through transcripts of his previous analysis on TV. "I went into it saying I wanted a book that was accessible," said Mr. Velshi. "That meant inexpensive, paperback, and easy to read."

On Wednesday evening, a crowd of TV newsmen and women descended on McCormick & Schmick's, a seafood restaurant in midtown Manhattan, to celebrate the book's publication. On our way in, the Media Mob bumped into Christine Romans, Mr. Velshi's co-host of CNN's Your $$$$$, and Victor Neufeld, the former CNN producer and charming man about town.

Inside, the private basement room was packed with wine-sipping well-wishers, including CNN U.S. President Jonathan Klein, executive vice president of CNN Worldwide Ken Jautz, and American Morning anchor John Roberts.

At one point in the evening, Mr. Klein stood at the front of the room and congratulated the author. He joked that Mr. Velshi was typically asking for more money. So the CNN boss was happy to hear that Mr. Velshi was now talking about giving money back.

"Between the book and the economy and the newsroom and my schedule, I don't get out much," said Mr. Velshi, the next morning. "So I was just kind of excited to be there."

So why should cable-TV attuned investors listen to Mr. Velshi's advice rather than, say, CNBC's manic Mad Money man Jim Cramer?

"Cramer is a guy I respect," said the diplomatic CNN anchor. "He's a guy that I consider a friend. I listen to Jim Cramer. Jim has an encyclopedic knowledge. You listen to Jim because you want to know about specific companies and how they're going to perform."

"You don't read my book to be a stock picker," he added. "You read my book to have a broad investment strategy because you're not otherwise planning on spending a lot of time day-trading. Mine is the book you read because you've never wanted to be involved in finances, or you don't understand your finances, but you'd still like to retire comfortably."

Mr. Velshi said he is aiming to publish a follow-up book sometime around the fall of 2009, which would focus more on how to optimize one's portfolio.

In the meantime, Mr. Velshi hopes his first book will help catch some of his viewers up to speed on the basics. "I put a book together that is not gimmicky and not all together novel," said Mr. Velshi. "It's fair, and it's easy to read, and it allows you to take action immediately."

According to Esquire's Scott Raab—whom you may recall controversially reported on the zombie scourge in Newark last year—Mr. Cramer was not unlike young Chas Tenenbaum from Wes Anderson's 2001 movie The Royal Tenenbaums.

In Jim Cramer: Just as Scared as the Rest of Us, Mr. Raab writes:

(Yes, but did he breed Dalmation Mice?)

Much of Mr. Raab's story is taken up with the challenge of trying to actually gain access to Mr. Cramer in order to write the story. The writer offers this anecdote about trying to set up his interview with someone he describes as "a man of exquisite sensitivity, not to say paranoia":

But amid the current financial panic, FBN is hoping to win over some viewers by running a political-style attack-ad knocking the record of CNBC's Jim Cramer.

"Financially, these are crazy times," warns a scary voiceover in the ads. "The last thing you need is bad advice. The last thing you need is CNBC's Jim Cramer."

Earlier this afternoon Editor-in-Chief David Morrow confirmed that there had been layoffs but declined to say exactly how many; and, according to Mr. Morrow, the cuts were not indicative of financial problems at The Street.

(According to recent financial filings, during the nine months ending in Sept. 2007, The Street racked up $45.5 million in revenue, an increase of 25 percent over the same time period in 2006.)

Rather, he said the cuts were part of a shift in editorial resources.

“We had a rightsizing,” said Mr. Morrow. “I switched around the staff to make it more focused on what people come to us for: business news and enterprise reporting.”

According to Mr. Morrow, www.thestreet.com will undergo a major redesign sometime in the coming weeks. He said he wants to hire a reporter to cover China, someone to write about India, and a high level editor.

He declined to say what positions had been cut yesterday, except to say that he had not fired any beat reporters and that the firings had included people on the copy and personal finance desk.

“We are hiring,” said Mr. Morrow. “I just need to have people in the right spots.”