Kristin Davis.

When we heard “The Explorers Club,” we assumed they were being ironic. Would we be whisked away on an “expedition” of Cafe Carlyle’s arsenal of booze? Or better yet, a geological dig inside of a Hermès bag? But no, these people were serious.

The Explorers Club is squeezed into a historic townhouse on East 70th Street, and it is a dusty temple of heritage that celebrates the exploration of—get this, cher lecteur—the planet Earth! From the intrepid excursions of Admiral Robert E. Peary and Matthew Alexander Henson in the Arctic to Sir Edmund Percival Hillary’s mountaineering career across the Himalayas, the place is littered with as many artifacts and busts as 10 Oscar de la Renta runway shows!

Shindigger had been invited—and believe us, we checked the invite twice—to the 100-plus-year-old establishment by none other than Peggy Siegal to preview National Geographic’s Battle for the Elephants, which was written, produced and directed by John Heminway. The documentary, slated to air this week on PBS, investigates the illegal tusk trade on the “Ivory Road” from Africa to Asia.

And just as we found ourselves very much involved with this serious subject, traipsing down the main staircase of the club with an empowered feeling of responsibility, we overheard a conversation that brought us quickly back to New York reality, as Ms. Siegal kissed billionaire David Koch and his wife, Julia Koch, who had underwritten the soirée.

“Wouldn’t this be nice if this was our house?” Ms. Koch asked her husband as he led her out of the club and into their awaiting Maybach. (Something tells us that the actual Koch residence is just fine.)

We navigated the wood-paneled halls of the club, marveling over taxidermy cheetahs, polar bears and impalas, and, ironically, ducking under a menagerie of tusks.

A few minutes before the screening, we found ourselves chatting with the film’s senior executive producer, John Bredar, over a glass of white in the club’s decadent library. “The most exciting thing [about the film] is that we have a chance, for the very first time, to tell the story from the supply side and demand side,” he said, adding that it’s “almost like a crime show. A very serious topic, but very entertaining.”

Mr. Heminway, the writer/filmmaker, has spent most of his life in Africa and has long wondered whether or not Africa could survive without elephants.

“Right now, I’m in the mode of advocacy,” he said, recalling the first time he saw an elephant. “I can remember being totally petrified at the age of 16, when an elephant came at me in the dark and I thought it was going to charge at me, and now, quite a few decades later, I’m still enchanted.

“It’s the one animal you can devote a lifetime to looking at and you never quite get the full story,” he continued. “They love, they mourn, they remember, I think they even laugh—although that’s not scientific.”

What was scientific: Shindigger was out of wine, and so we moved on to explore the possibility of refreshing our glass at the library bar. Which was where the star power was hiding, remaining low-key, if not evasive. Tommy Hilfiger and wife Dee Ocleppo chatted up friends, Departures editor in chief Richard David Story held court at a small bar-side table and legendary fashion designer Valentino Garavani’s saddle-hued tan bordered on fluorescent.

A few moments passed, and then a blonde siren shifted our way. ’Twas model Dree Hemingway, great-granddaughter of Ernest, the legendary explorer of both word and world. She was a first-timer at the Explorers Club and was already enamored. “It’s one of the most unreal, epic buildings,” she said.

An ardent supporter of the elephant, Ms. Hemingway told us she had fallen in love with the creature nearly two years ago, during a trip to Borana Ranch & Safari Lodge, a luxurious safari outpost on the equator in Kenya’s Laikipia District.

“They’re the most unbelievable animals: they’re huge, and they’re sensitive and beautiful. They’re also really protective,” she said. “I love Kenya more than anything.”

(Shindigger loves red wine more than anything, and so we poached another glass.)

Nearby, we found Lauren Bush Lauren, who was way ahead of the curve, having already seen parts of the film.

“It’s an important cause,” she said, and then: “Watch out!” as some queen unmindfully careened past us in search of a refill. On impulse, Ms. Bush Lauren grabbed Shindigger’s arm, preventing us from tottering into a pastoral oil on canvas.

Having been saved from embarrassment, Shindigger headed gracefully toward our seat for the screening. After the documentary, there was a brief discussion with the filmmakers and producers, including staunch elephant devotee Kristin Davis, who spoke passionately, with tears in her eyes.

“It’s just such a shocking, shocking thing to think that elephants could be extinct. It’s not acceptable,” she said. As the panel discussion concluded, Ms. Davis grabbed the mic one more time. “We’re in America! We’re Americans ... We can do what we can! Where’s that American spirit?” she yelled with a fist pump.

And on that note, the event came to an end, and we were all sent back out into the cold city night, ready once again to brave the concrete jungle.

Davis. (Photo by Andrew Reid)

Manhattan Madam and former gubernatorial candidate Kristin Davis has a few words of wisdom for struggling starlet Lindsay Lohan: fire your lawyer.

Ms. Lohan was arrested this morning after an alleged “bender” following the negative reviews of her recent flop Liz & Dick. Police say she got into some fisticuffs with Tiffany Eve Mitchell in the VIP section of Avenue Thursday evening and collared her there and then.

Following Ms. Lohan’s arrest for assault in the third degree for punching the Florida psychic in the face at the Chelsea nightclub, the redhead reportedly enlisted the help of notorious New York attorney Mark Heller.

In an open letter to Ms. Lohan, Ms. Davis claims that during her stint at Rikers during everyone's favorite Eliot Spitzer scandal, Mr. Heller committed a host of crimes against her, including but not limited to stealing thousands of dollars, turning her case into a media circus and calling her “lunch meat” in court.

“Dear Lindsay,” the letter, which The Observer obtained before its release, begins.

“While we don’t personally know each other, I feel compelled to inform you about your choice in attorneys, Mark Jay Heller.  If you care about your freedom- you will fire him immediately and retain competent representation,’ Ms. Davis says, before mentioning that Lifetime once made a movie about her life.

 The Observer spoke to Ms. Davis about the letter and why she felt so compelled to help Ms. Lohan.

“He’s a hawk. He watches the news and finds a high-profile person and says 'I’ll represent you for free,'” Ms. Davis said. “I retained him prior to my arrest to turn myself in. He went out there and tried to sell my story instead of trying to keep me out of jail.”

One of her most horrifying memories of her time with Mr. Heller was when he allegedly referred to her as lunch meat.

“In one of his motions to dismiss the case he wrote, ‘We all know that prosecutors can indict a ham sandwich and Ms. Davis is not a piece of lunch meat.’ The judge was shocked,” she said.

Ms. Davis says that Mr. Heller failed to secure bail for four months, leaving her “rotting in Rikers.” After giving him upward of $175,000, Ms. Davis says she fired him for incompetence. She hired a new attorney and was freed four days later.

“We’re talking about her freedom. I want to do the right thing for Lindsay.  She could be looking at a year in jail at least,” Ms. Davis.

Ms. Davis’s complaints against Mr. Heller are not unwarranted; The New York Times ran a profile of him in 2010 in which they interviewed former clients, judges and fellow attorneys that called him a “menace to the public,” “shockingly cavalier and abusive,” and cited a disciplinary panel that recommended a five-year suspension for “puffery.”

Earlier this year, convicted pimp Jason Itzler fired Mr. Heller at his sentencing for failing to keep him out of the pokey.

“I don’t trust Heller!” Mr. Itzler shouted at the time, according to The New York Times. “Heller to me is the devil!”

Mr. Heller, whom we reached by dialing him at 1-800-LAWYER-911, took the criticism in stride.

“I became an attorney 44 years ago, and in all that time I’ve represented a lot of clients. Thankfully most of my clients are happy. Apparently Ms Davis is unhappy, but the allegations that she has made are inaccurate,” Mr. Heller told The Observer.

He rebuffed her claim that he stole any funds from her or was dishonest in his dealings. He wasn’t sure, however, if he had ever compared her to the product of a corner deli.

“It sounds like a great quote,” he said. “I just don’t recall saying it.”

He said claims like Ms. Davis’s go with “the territory,” and went on to take a dig at her.

“I think there are some very serious issues concerning her credibility,” he fired back.

As for Ms. Lohan, he says he and she are bosom buddies, having met in the wee hours of the morning at the 10th Precinct.

“I was contacted yesterday. I met her at the precinct. I got her released in a short time without any bail or orders of protection,” he said.

He told The New York Post that Ms. Lohan was “a victim of someone trying to capture their 15 minutes of fame,” but like all stories involving LiLo, there’s yet another twist.

Turns out Mr. Heller may not even be Ms. Lohan’s attorney after all, according to her freshly hired PR reps.

“Lindsay Lohan’s attorney remains her longtime legal counsel Shawn Holley. Mr. Heller is not representing Ms. Lohan as is being reported,” a member of Ms. Lohan’s team told The Observer.

Another happy ending.

The buxom blonde, known best as the "Manhattan Madam" who claims to have provided call girls for a certain former governor, ran as the Anti-Prohibition candidate, and, seeing as how her platform was based on the need to legalize marijuana, prostitution and casinos, the paltry crowd at Taj Lounge so early in the evening came somewhat as a surprise.

Still, a little over two hours after the polls closed, as Andrew Cuomo was giving his victory speech and sending out emails to supporters urging them to continue championing his causes, Davis was standing in a bar in The Flatiron District, talking to the few reporters and supporters left.

The party was over. Her political strategist Roger Stone, the political operative who claimed a role in the Spitzer prostitution scandal and who helped run Davis' campaign, left a half hour before. Vivia Morgan, who ran on the Anti-Prohibition party line for state senator, made a cameo appearance before going back to Brooklyn to be with her children. The colorful characters that had been attracted to her campaign-- including son-of-a-druglord Pablo Escobar Jr. and porn star Britney Andrews-- had also left.

Until the end, Davis remained focused on the secondary goal: to get 50,000 votes, which will insure the placement of the Anti-Prohibition line on the New York state ballot for the next four years.

"They don't care about minor party candidates, so its really about who won and we know that's Cuomo so now we need to see if we got 50,000 votes or not," Davis said.

In the end, Davis didn't make that threshold. She got 22,775 votes, placing sixth in a seven-person race. While she was aware she was a long shot candidate, she doesn't intended to leave the ideals of her campaign behind.

"I haven't made any concrete plans but I do know that a lot of New Yorkers have come up to me on the campaign trail and a lot of gay and lesbian community have said 'will you please keep fighting for me if I give you my vote' and I don't plan on letting those people down."

While Andrew Cuomo and Carl Paladino are keeping up a maddening pace criss-crossing the state, the five "other" candidates for governor are mostly taking it easy today and tomorrow.

Warren Redlich, Libertarian Party: No campaign events. “Our campaign has been heavily focused on the internet and we will continue working there,” Redlich said via email.

Charles Barron, Freedom Party: Barron is attending a campaign event at Uniondale Library in Long Island at 7:15 tonight.

 Jimmy McMillan, The Rent is Too Damn High Party: 4:30-7:00, campaigning in Times Square at Broadway between 47^th and 48th. Spokesperson Caprice Alves said they chose this venue “to give him access and to have him have a forum to be himself, to be with the people that are supporting him.”

Kristin Davis, Anti-Prohibition Party: She will be doing radio interviews for Party FM, Fiesta, 95X in Syracuse and Mayor Jeff Graham’s show on WANT-FM in Watertown. Aside from the interviews, campaign aide Andrew Miller said Davis plans to “hang out and enjoy all the hard work we did.”

Davis is also hosting an election night party at Taj Lounge Tuesday night that her campaign said is open to the public.

Howie Hawkins, The Green Party: Hawkins is in Syracuse and will be campaigning all day, working out of his campaign office. 

David Collison, the Reform Party National Committee chairman, sent the email (copied in full below) to Ms. Davis on June 29. The national Reform Party coalesced around Ross Perot's presidential campaigns in the 1990s. But in New York, Mr. Perot ran on the Independence Party line. Even so, the legal questions surrounding the issue are so arcane—and rife with potentially expensive litigation—that Ms. Davis said today she'd rather just change her party name.

Ms. Davis, who ran a prostitution ring that she claims supplied former Governor Eliot Spitzer with call girls, is now herself running for governor on a platform of marijuana, gambling and prostitution legalization, and the recognition of gay marriage.

"We kind of hit a nice little roadblock there," Ms. Davis said.

Her adviser, Roger Stone, said that now, as far as party names are concerned, they're back to square one.

"We're looking at a series of other names," Mr. Stone said. "We looked at the Surprise Party. The Citizens Party. We looked at the Hookers and Pot Party. We looked at the Marijuana Legalization Party. There were problems with that. We considered the Freedom Party, then we found out Charles Barron, the fiery black civil rights advocate and council member, was filing under that.

"So we're still wrangling for a name."

In a statement, Mr. Collison of the Reform Party explained his position: "It was our hope that the situation would be settled quickly and amicably prior to her starting the petitioning process. I'm glad we were able to do so. We don't want to cause Ms. Davis any harm, but we can not allow someone to simply adopt the use of our name either."

"...[Ms. Davis'] platform focused primarily on legalizing marijuana, legalizing gambling, and legalizing prostitution," Mr. Collison continued. "None of these issues are areas where the Reform Party focuses. Instead we focus on fiscal responsibility, creating jobs (especially in manufacturing and small businesses), and more limited Federal Government. We do not take a left or right position on what we consider 'values issues like wholesale drug legalization."

Here's the letter:

Ms. Davis,

I was forwarded a press release stating that you were seeking to run for Governor in New York as a Reform Party candidate.

Please be advised that, like the Libertarians, the Reform Party is a National Party Organization with a presence across the country. While we do not have a ballot line in New York at this time, we do have an existing organization there, with existing leadership, and a formal process for both joining that organization and seeking to use the Reform Party name for seeking elected office.

Likewise, we have several court rulings, including a recent summary judgment in NY Federal Court, clearly showing that we have the rights to use and control the use of the Reform Party name nationally. We have National Party Committee status. We have a functioning Reform Party organization inNew York.

The purpose of this communication is to ask you to immediately change the name under which you are seeking to run for Governor. We have an established process for joining a Reform Party organization, and for seeking to run for office under the Reform Party service mark, and you have not followed that process. I understand that there is still sufficient time to change your ballot line title before you begin the petitioning process. I believe that doing so will save both the Reform Party and your campaign significant legal issues.

Thank you for your consideration

David Collison

Chairman, Reform Party National Committee 2008-2012

drubinstein@observer.com

Sex and the City 2

What's the story: Also known as Ishtar in Manolo Blahniks. Sex and the City 2 finds Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda and Samantha (Sarah Jessica Parker, Kristin Davis, Cynthia Nixon and Kim Cattrall) headed to Abu Dhabi for a vacation. Because, sure. Needless to say, cocktails are imbibed, shoes are purchased and old friends—in the form of Carrie's ex-boyfriend, John Corbett's Aidan—show up to cause problems. Plus, Liza Minelli sings "Single Ladies." As you can guess, the reviews for Sex and the City 2 have been so vitriolic that you would think they were complaint letters to BP. Our Rex Reed begins his review thusly: "The only thing memorable about Sex and the City 2 is the number two part, which describes it totally, if you get my drift." Needless to say, he wasn't a fan.

Who should see it: Every woman in Manhattan.

The Price of Persia: The Sands of Time

What's the story: Jerry Bruckheimer is nothing if not resourceful. After building a blockbuster franchise out of a theme park—Pirate of the Caribbean, if you had forgotten—the über-producer heads to the world of video games for his latest hopeful smash, The Prince of Persia. Sadly, Johnny Depp isn't around this time; the swashbuckling hero is played by Jake Gyllenhaal and his 24-pack abs. Anyway, there is a dagger, and a princess, and lots of swordplay. If you're predisposed to this sort of thing, you'll like it; for the rest of us, it'll just be an excuse to find some air-conditioning.

Who should see it: Jack Sparrow.

Also opening this weekend: Jean Pierre-Jenaut (Amelie) brings his whimsy back to theaters with Micmacs; George A. Romero brings his zombies back to theaters with Survival of the Dead.

Apparently, one viewer was displeased.

Today, Kristin Davis, who previously supplied call girls to the former governor, sent out a press release questioning MSNBC's standards.

From the release:

"I defend MSNBC's right to interview Spitzer at any time, but making him a host and questioning others, condones behavior which is beyond the pale. Eliot Spitzer had the money and lawyers to avoid being convicted of his crimes, but that does not mean he deserves a position of public trust, based on his proven actions," said Davis.

"I worked 10 years in finance," alleged Spitzer-madam Kristin Davis told a Libertarian group last week, according to the Daily News. "I was vice president of a hedge fund. I went on to build a multimillion-dollar business from scratch."

She expanded on her blog. "Unlike any of the other candidates for governor I have created jobs and made a payroll. I am certainly more qualified than the losers and hacks we have in Albany now!" she wrote.

Ms. Davis, with the help of infamous operative Roger Stone, had previously pledged to run against Eliot Spitzer if the former governor decided it wasn't too soon to seek elected office. But now, Ms. Davis appears to be going for either the Libertarian nomination, or might try to petition her way onto the ballot under her own Personal Freedom Party [corrected], regardless of Mr. Spitzer's plans.

"This started out being about Spitzer," admitted Stone, who in 2007 tipped off the FBI to Spitzer's hooker habit. "But now that it looks like he won't run, Kristin still wants to use her celebrity to highlight a reform agenda."

In addition to her finance experience, Ms. Davis said she would like to legalize prostitution, marijuana and gay marriage.

UPDATE: Mr. Stone emailed to correct an earlier version of this post, which stated Ms. Davis might seek the Republican nomination. "Because the terms of her probation prohibit her from associating with any individuals of dubious character I have not allowed her to meet any New York state legislators," Mr. Stone wrote, by way of explanation. The Observer regrets the error.

“I’m kind of a homebody,” said Kristin Davis.

The buxom 32-year-old former Manhattan madam, who operated a high-class prostitution ring, valued at a reported $5 million, prior to her three-and-a-half-month jail sentence last year, was speaking to reporters on Wednesday night, March 25, at the Safari-themed Cain Luxe nightclub on West 27th Street.

She was wearing a tiny pink dress, sitting legs crossed along a velvet banquette, sipping a Diet Coke, flanked by a friend wearing vampire fangs.

Ms. Davis was at the club to promote her new book, The Manhattan Madam, which she described as “a good look at the inside sex lives of the rich and powerful.”

She had previously identified former Governor Eliot Spitzer as a onetime client of her bawdy business—“the fact that I know a lot more about him than I could ever even divulge, right now, it’s just kinda sick,” Ms. Davis told the Daily Transom—but she has so far kept quiet about her other high-profile customers. (“I haven’t made any decisions on that yet,” she said.)

Ms. Davis offered some advice for the disgraced ex-governor: “I want him to come on the record and be like, ‘Look, here’s what happened—I’m a sex addict, whatever!' And just like, let’s keep it real!”

Ms. Davis was joined by a host of sex-industry sympathizers, including the comedian Chuck Nice, Penthouse magazine columnist Victoria Zdrok and former adult actress Robin Byrd of Debbie Does Dallas fame. (Penthouse, which published an except of Ms. Davis' book in its April 2009 issue, sponsored the party.)

“If you’re not into something, don’t be into it,” said Mr. Nice. “But, if you want to take some whipped cream, put it between your toes, have your dog licking it up and, at the same time, have your girlfriend poke you in the eye, then that’s fine. That’s a little weird but we shouldn’t judge.”

Ms. Davis tried to explain to me—a native of the Netherlands, where prostitution is regulated but not strictly prohibited (it’s complicated)—what all the fuss was all about: “I think it’s different because you’re from Holland, but Americans are fascinated by the sex industry. Because it’s illegal, they think it’s glamorous. It’s not like how it is in Holland. I’ve been to Holland. I think it’s beautiful. I think Dutch people are beautiful…. Americans are just fascinated by this industry, ’cause it’s taboo. It’s completely different here.”

Ms. Davis described her time imprisoned at Rikers Island last year as a “horrible” experience. “My whole life changed,” she said. “I went from living a glamorous life to living a whole different kind of existence. I’m on probation and under the scrutiny of the New York correctional department, and you have the book out, and we have many different offers of different people. It’s got a certain kind of excitement, but it’s not like how it was.”

I asked Ms. Davis about her relationship with the incarcerated hip-hop artist Remy Ma:

“She was my best friend [at Rikers] and I consider her one of my best friends now,” Ms. Davis said, “because when I was going through Rikers and everyone abandoned me, including my boyfriend, I was hysterical, crying, and she was the one that was there. And, when somebody needed to step up to the plate, that’s who did, and I have an immense amount of loyalty, respect, and love for her. And if she’s going to prison for eight years—that’s what she’s sentenced for—I’ll go there, and I’ll go there every week, for eight years. That’s the type of person I am.”

I also asked Ms. Davis about her rumored relationship with Yankees slugger Alex Rodriguez: “I haven’t confirmed it! I have nothing to say at this point in time, right?”

I further wondered what the future held for Ms. Davis. “I think it’s almost impossible for me at this point,” she said. “I mean, my background is VP of finance. Will I ever get a job in a hedge fund as a felon? Probably not!”

But there’s always reality TV! “Right now, we have a couple of offers on the table of reality TV, a documentary of my life,” she said. “I’m actually very excited about the documentary, ’cause it will show more of the interpersonal relationship between me and the girls, and me and my family, and I think that’s an interesting angle.”

Barack and Michelle Obama appear on the cover of Us Weekly this week with Mrs. Obama depicted as a "down-to-earth mom." Never mind the fact that she graduated cum laude from Princeton followed by Harvard Law. [Us Weekly]

Exes Anne Hathaway and Raffaello Follieri stayed at separate residences in New York yesterday—Ms. Hathaway at Gramercy Park Hotel and Mr. Follieri at his rental in Trump Tower—but were reportedly planning to meet up for dinner at Cipriani's. [P6]

New York socialites and actresses put on their binding Herve Leger mini dresses Tuesday night for the Whitney Art Party. [NY Daily News]

Dylan Lauren, Ralph's daughter, is expanding her Dylan's Candy Bar flagship store and will launch more outposts in Neiman Marcus stores this fall. [WWD]

50 Cent is going to court to prove that he didn't mastermind the fire at his Long Island home, where his ex and 11-year-old son lived. [NY Daily News]