Best prank ever! (Bravo)

Ha ha. Love this. It's not even technically a "prank," so much as a very good method for finding out what former co-workers really thought about you. All you do is wait until they are on a nationally syndicated program, and then call up the show pretending to be someone named "Coco" from "New Hampshire." You don't even have to mask your voice!

Then you can ask them what it was like working with you (their former colleague), and they will be forced to say the absolute truth, lulled into a false sense of security by the thought that you (former co-worker) is not only not tuning into this nationally syndicated program, but could in no way be the caller yourself.

Pro tip: Do not do this on Andy Cohen's Watch What Happens Live, because that man either has Caller ID flashing on his teleprompter or has memorized the voices of everyone on television. Probably the latter.

We love you, Amy Poehler. We love you, Seth Meyers. We are kind of mad at you, Andy Cohen, for not letting this joke play out a little longer, but we love you too. And let us just say, we are really looking forward to when Shia Lebeouf tries this on Alec Baldwin next month.

Do not go on any Brazilian elevators (YouTube)

What do you think about when you hear the word "Brazil"? Does it conjure up pictures of beautiful beaches, buxom models, and tropical drinks? Or does your mind immediately go to darker places: Terry Gilliam's nightmarish visions of bureaucracy gone mad, the slums of Rio de Janeiro, the torture of a Brazilian wax, or poor Eduardo Saverin?

Because, let's face it, Brazil can kind of be a scary place. Especially since the country's version of Candid Camera apparently involves terrifying the every-loving shit out of hapless victims who use their elevators, as exemplified in this YouTube video that has been making the rounds?

http://youtu.be/7N5OhNplEd4

Those poor people. That poor girl! As Rex Sorgatz wrote on VIEWSOURCE, "That little girl is lucky no one punched her." Also "Why are Brazilians so cruel?"

Over 64 percent of Brazilians are Roman Catholic, which is definitely not the religious mindset you want to be screwing with when you put Linda Blair Jr. in a metal cage with someone and shut off the lights. The power of Christ compels you...to push the emergency button and pry the doors open with your teeth.

An unidentified person made the distress call via radio transmission— at the (coincidentally) stoner-loving time of 4:20pm. The caller claimed a boat named the Blind Date had exploded  and then sunk 17 nautical miles off the coast of central New Jersey. It was reported that all 21 passengers had made it onto life rafts but many were suffering injuries from the incident.

"We got to the reported location within the hour but by 6:30 we looked into the possibility of it being a hoax call," Captain Gregory P. Hitchen of the Coast Guard, said in a press conference at 10am this morning. "With the weather conditions last night, if there was an explosion like the one reported it would have been easy to spot debris, bright orange life rafts or an oil slick from one of our helicopters."

After determining the call was most likely a scam, the Coast Guard offered a $3,000 reward for anyone with information about the person responsible for the false reports. If prosecuted, this federal offense could cost the prankster fines up to $250,000 or 10 years in prison.

"There are many motives for one to do such a thing," Captain Hitchens explained. "For a variety of reasons, people like the attention they get from watching the boats and helicopters go out and search. It's very strange."

June 14 2011, almost exactly a year ago, an unidentified caller reported a sinking 33-foot sailboat with four passengers taking on water in the same Sandy Hook bay. Like yesterday's effort, the search was extensive but fruitless and later ruled as a hoax. The Coast Guard is currently looking into the possibility of a connection between the two incidents. While last years call was at 3:20 and not 4:20, the internet is still abuzz with the possible non-coincidence of yesterdays prankster making his report at a universally adopted "burn time" for marijuana users.

Isn't the general mainstream consensus that stoners are relaxed and unmotivated? Whatever happened to listening to The Dark Side of The Moon while tripping off of the technicolor visuals of The Wizard of Oz and wolfing down Taco Bell in your parents basement?

Which is why the case of Justin Veitch is so satisfying. David Pogue reposted a long exchange between Veitch and an email scammer. 

The con artist posed as Alex, an actual friend of Mr. Veitch, using an email that looked just like Alex's, but ended in ymail.com, instead of gmail.

"Alex" is supposedly stranded in London with no credit card and needs funds. 

Veitch pretends to be wiring the money, but keeps delaying, eventually forcing the spammer to engage him on an initmate level. 

"Alex, before I do this, and I want to, but before I do this just tell me one thing; how was I, as a lover? I’ve been wanting to know this for ages but haven’t ever had the courage to ask."

"James dont start am in a mess right now and my head aches please just get back me out of this mess and we will discuss this when i get home okay. Thanks and waiting to hear from you soon"

"If that’s the way you’re going to behave then maybe you can just dig yourself out of this mess. Remember Tuscany? Those huge waves? The way you wheeled me all over town. All I want to know is whether you still love me. Tell me you still love me?"

Check out the full thread over at Pogue's Posts, it just gets better. 

ajeffries [at] observer.com | @benpopper