The Observer was sitting at Hooters, in one of the establishment’s “finest booths” (our request), daintily sipping a Banana-Rama piña colata, and watching Vice‘s notorious co-founder Gavin McInnes imploding. “Why would I have gone all the way upstate to eat piss-covered cornflakes??” he screamed into our cell phone, drawing stares from the lunch crowd of really sad-looking single men. Beneath his dirty blonde beard, Mr. McInnes was turning beet red. “Why wouldn’t I have ate the piss cornflakes in my house? Or in the office???”
We couldn’t hear what the person on the other end of the line is saying, but whatever it was, the author of the new memoir of How to Piss in Public (Scribner, March 20) started to foam at the mouth in response. “I just told you why I pissed in the cornflakes! It was for the DVD! It matched with the card up your ass trick in the movie!”
Another pause, and Mr. McInnes (pronounced, for the last time, like McGuinness but with no “G,”) started to stress points at an incoherent, rambling speed.
“I don’t lie, dude! You got duped by your own prank!” he yelled at one point.
“I had already done it two weeks before the Gawker thing!” he said at another. Before hanging up, he has been reduced to schoolyard insults:
“Whatever, you’re stupid, bye.”
He looked at us. “I’m not going to give you a check for $1,000.”
Before his semi-meltdown, the inflammatory jokester who once referred to Jesus as a gay Jew on Bill Maher’s show, had told me two things: He couldn’t remember anytime someone had “got him” with a good prank, and that as he’s grown older and raised a family, he’s really mellowed out.
We were happy to prove him wrong on both points.
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