Katie Holmes

It’s been a typically weird season for Broadway, with little orphan Annie once again captivating audiences with her story of a little girl getting plucked from obscurity by a Romneyesque billionaire, Katie Holmes breaking free from Scientology’s clutches by starring in an intimate chamber-piece of a drama, and the expeditious closing of David Mamet’s latest play as a revival of his Glengarry Glen Ross extended its preview period for what felt like an eternity. And all of that will come up for mockery at tonight’s 2017 Tony Awardz, a midseason check-in taking on the year’s best, worst and most laughable in the form of an awards show in the not-too-distant future. Maybe by then, Ms. Holmes will be our generation’s Kristin Chenoweth.

Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre, 307 West 26th Street, 9:30pm, tickets and information can be found at newyork.ucbtheatre.com.

Everyone knows the feeling. The New Yorker shows up again and you haven't even finished the issue from last week. Or that #longreads profile that everybody was talking about two weeks ago is only half read and now it's too late to be part of The Conversation (were you ever even part of it?). Cue maniacal laughter.

Located on Avenue A and 3rd street, UCB East will focus more on stand-up, variety, and one-man shows than the sketch/improv performances likes ASSSCAT UCB is traditionally associated with. Classes will still be taught at the training center on 30th street, though graduates now have two stages on which to become the next Amy Poehler or Donald Glover.

Considering all the comedy nerds in New York, you’d think there would have been a record of UCB East’s premiere shows last week, but there’s been a surprising lack of coverage of the new theater. In part that may be due to the difficulty in finding out what’s playing: the theater just today put up an official schedule, but until today it was up to other comedy blogs to post the show listings.

"I think (UCB) is trying out a soft launch," says Joe Mande when asked about the lack of an opening ceremony for the new theater. Mande is the co-host of Totally JK with Noah Garfinkel, which moved from once a month to a once a week format in its new location. (Thursdays at 9:00 p.m.) "They're opening their doors and hoping for an organic following."

"The verbiage that we're using is 'preview schedule,'" says UCB's Artistic Director Nate Dern. "The grand opening is actually October 29th, and that's when we'll have our UCB four -- that's what we call founders Amy Poehler, Matt Besser, Matt Walsh, and Ian Roberts -- out for a big celebration."

Mande himself is looking forward to performing in the new space that doesn’t involve the arena design of its predecessor.

"This theater, the structure-wise, is really good for stand-up. It made you – and by you I mean me -- feel really insecure having people look at you from all directions."

This should be less of a problem at The Beast, which features approximately 140 seats all facing forward, auditorium-style. And as for the curtains and "Hot Girls Room" sign? According to Dern, it was just a matter of bureaucratic red tape: they'll both be back up in time to trumpet the arrival of the new Brigade.

The result is Vag Magazine, a web comedy focused on a staff of would-be media moguls as they navigate the tumultuous industry of feminist publishing. But they are foiled by two factors -- each other, and their own ineptitude. 

This is new ground for comedy, said Cohan-Miccio, who saw that there there were few examples of the type of feminist anti-heroes she and Tegart wanted to depict. "These are women that are just going so hard for what they want, and they are not necessarily succeeding at it,"  the 27-year-old said.

Each character in the show has a different take on the feminist movement: Fennel, played by Nicole Drespel, for example, assumes a more "back-to-nature" feminism, and in one episode eschews menstrual pads in favor of a large wooden bucket. 

"We were surprised that no one was doing a parody of this," Cohan-Miccio said. "Our intention was not to stick it to feminists. I think we both identify as feminists. Feminism is so nebulous, and to some extent just whatever people say it is."

Tegart agreed. "As far as our criticism of that culture, I think it's all wrapped up in Sylvie's line in the first episode where she defines feminism as 'women doing whatever we want.'"

But creating Vag Magazine was more than just poking at feminism. Cohan-Miccio and Tegart also wanted to write something that would let them showcase their friends at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre. This adds volumes to Vag Magazine performances, largely because the actresses seem written for their roles. Meghan, played by Sarah Claspell, sports a permanently skeptical frown and acts as Vag Magazine's sole voice of reason. Kit, played by Morgan Grace Jarrett, is the eager office intern who never stops smiling.

"I think that, ultimately, people like to be parodied and I hope that it's obvious from our parodies that we are feminists," Tegart said. "I think that, in a way, we are saying that this is important enough to parodied." 

12:30 p.m. Niall O’Leary’s Irish Dance Troupe holds an "afternoon of classic and modern step dance" at the World Financial Center’s Winter Garden, 220 Vesey Street between North End Avenue and the West Side Highway. Admission is free.

1 p.m. 11th annual Luck of the Irish St. Patrick's Day Pub Crawl continues at The Village Pourhouse, 64 Third Avenue and 11th Street. More than 100 East Village, Murray Hill, and U.E.S. bars are also participating, trying to breake a Guinness (ha.) World Record and offering drink specials.

6 p.m. "How Do I Look? screening and vogueing performance" will be held at the Jewish Community Center (for something different). This event will feature Wolfgang Busch’s documentary about Harlem ball culture, along with a rare voguing performance by the House of Ninja and a Q&A with Busch and ballroom icon Kevin Omni. At 334 Amsterdam Ave at  76th Street. Tickets are $10.

6 p.m. The Bridget Murphy’s St. Patrick’s Day Celebration will take place in the servants' quarters (usually off limits) of the Merchant's House Museum: "arguably the oldest site of Irish habitation in N.Y.C."  Reenactors perform stories of Irish heritage, there will be bagpipes and sample cuisine. At 29 East 4th Street between Bowery and Lafayette. Admission is $30, $15 for members.

7 p.m. SideBar hosts "Luck of the Irish Gold Scavenger Hunt" at 118 East 15 Street. Price to play is free.

8 p.m. The New York Festival of Song will be held at The Merkin Concert Hall, 129 West 67th Street, tickets range from $45 to $75.

8 p.m. The Upright Citizens Brigade performs Theatre’s O’Harold Night, a St. Patrick’s Day improve where the first group of comics will appear sober, and each one that follows will be drunker than the last. At U.C.B. Theatre, 307 West 26th Street between Eighth and Ninth Avenue.  Admission is $5.

Playbill reports: