Shades of Animal House! Trick Fails to Thwart Parade

Not everyone adores the St. Patrick’s Day Parade some Fifth Avenue residents overlooking the parade route immediately come to mind but few have gone to the lengths that the group identified by police as the Irish Lesbian and Gay Organization, which seems to exist solely to protest the St. Patrick’s Day Parade, did to disrupt it on March 17.

According to the police, at 12:55 p.m. two members of the organization hung a banner “denouncing the St. Patrick’s Day Parade” from a cable at Fifth Avenue and 62nd Street. They then attached one end of the cable to a metal NYPD traffic barricade and prepared to dash across the street with the other, hoping to stop the world’s largest parade in its tracks by blocking the parade route.

“The attempt was to chain it to one side of the street and run across and chain it to the other side,” explained a cop.

However, police officers from the 70th Precinct assigned to the parade detail spotted the protesters before they could implement their plan, and moved in to arrest them. The women, who had also affixed themselves to the cable, didn’t succumb without a struggle, however. One of them bit a police officer on the back during the ensuing altercation, and then she and a second female protester dropped to the ground to make it harder for the cops to handcuff them. While they were struggling with the police, a third protester tried to impede the arrest by inserting herself between her compatriots and the cops.

“Their goal was to stop the parade,” reported a police public-affairs officer who responded to the scene, although he said the women didn’t explain their actions once they were under arrest and placed in a police van. “They didn’t say anything or make any motions once the handcuffs were on them,” he added. “They didn’t talk at all.”

The police officer who was bitten (and described as in substantial pain) was removed to New York Presbyterian Hospital. The female who attacked him, a 26-year-old Bronx resident, was charged with obstructing governmental administration, resisting arrest, disorderly conduct, unlawfully posting a banner and assault in the second degree.

“She didn’t break the skin, but you could see the teeth mark,” the public-affairs officer said. Her co-conspirator attached to the other end of the cable was charged with the same crimes (with the exception of assault), and the female who tried to thwart their arrest was charged with obstructing governmental administration and resisting arrest. The wounded officer was treated at the hospital and released.

Brass-Knuckle Driver

While the amount of drinking and carousing at this year’s parade was described as relatively restrained by a police captain assigned to the area around 84th Street and Second Avenue “It was busy, but a lot quieter, a lot less drinking in the street compared to years past,” he reported. “It rained on and off, which sort of kept people in” the parade was not without its moments of interest. At a D.W.I. checkpoint at 62nd Street and York Avenue at 8 p.m., one motorist who was pulled over turned out to be in possession of a rather nasty weapon. It was described as a “metal-knuckle knife” apparently a set of brass knuckles with a knife protruding from one of the knuckles and it was in plain view on the passenger seat.

Upon further investigation, the cops discovered that the suspect had previously received three driving suspensions on one day, though he apparently wasn’t drunk when he was pulled over the night of the parade. The perp, a 33-year-old Baltimore, Md., resident, was arrested and charged with criminal possession of a weapon.

Vegan Vagrant

Vegetables are an increasingly important part of the average health-conscious American’s diet. But few go to the lengths that one East 74th Street resident did on March 18 to get her roughage. The 49-year-old perp visited the Food Emporium at 1175 Third Avenue at 7:30 p.m. and tried to steal several heads of arugula and iceberg lettuce from the produce area. When the store manager spotted her and tried to confiscate the greens, the suspect put up quite a struggle, striking him about the face and hands and causing cuts to his face and finger. The woman was eventually subdued and arrested for robbery.

Hold the Pepperoni

The Upper East Side has had its share of delivery-boy robberies lately, but most of the attacks have been for money, not to satisfy the crook’s appetite, as appeared to be the case with one attack on March 15. A mushroom pizza with extra cheese from Anna Maria’s Pizzeria at 1681 First Avenue was bound for a fourth-floor apartment at 1780 First Avenue when the delivery man was intercepted in the lobby by a 6-foot male “who indicated the pizza was for him,” according to the police.

The pizzeria employee, taking the gentleman at his word, handed him the pizza. But at that point the villain announced that he had no intention of paying for the pie, so the delivery man decided to take it back. But before he could, the perp fled with it in an unknown direction. The victim proceeded to the 19th Precinct station house, where he examined mug shots of possible pizza thieves, with negative results. The pie was valued at $15.

Sign of the Times

A 15-year-old teenager was walking along 91st Street at Second Avenue at 3:20 p.m. on March 14 when a group of males ran up behind him, slapped him on the back and then fled. The victim later discovered that they’d stuck a piece of paper with a cobra design to his back. The victim filed a harassment complaint against his assailants. A police official said he doubted that the snake was any sort of gang symbol, though he was at a loss to explain its significance. “I thought you just had to do a sign that said, ‘Kick me,'” he shrugged.

Shades of Animal House!  Trick Fails to Thwart Parade