Eight Day Week

Wednesday 18th Fashion Week backwash: Ptooey! It used to be that Daisy Fuentes was the de facto spokesmodel for our

Wednesday 18th

Fashion Week backwash: Ptooey! It used to be that Daisy Fuentes was the de facto spokesmodel for our Latina sisters, but then J. Lo and her monstrous rump took over the MTV airwaves …. Anyway, today that staggeringly successful post-post-feminist magazine, Lucky , helps Ms. Fuentes launch a new clothing line, and we’ll just feel “lucky” if said line doesn’t include those silly knit caps with the flaps that tie under the chin; Manhattan is just bursting with those lately. Crash strategy: a prissy skirt and sweater set-yes, according to The New York Times Styles section, sluttish dressing is finally out ! Meanwhile, Manhattan’s high-culture vultures throw a gala preview of the Art Dealers Association of America’s Art Show, benefiting the Henry Street Settlement (a social-services charity). You got your de Kooning, your Pollock, your Hopper, your Picasso, your Lichtenstein and a “bold” Henri Matisse line drawing from 1947 (the last time sluttish dressing was out)-also, ageless lady philanthropists Agnes Gund and Kitty Carlisle Hart.

[Daisy Fuentes Collection launch party, Splashlight Studios, 529 West 35th Street,

6 to 8 p.m., 877-902-6633; the Art Dealers Association of America Art Show gala

benefit preview, Seventh Regiment Armory, Park Avenue at 67th Street, 5:30 to 9:30 p.m., 212-766-9200, ext. 248.]

Thursday 19th

Marlo or Meryl? Badlands anchorman and thinking woman’s sex symbol Tom Brokaw is honored tonight by the Museum of Television and Radio at the bechandeliered Waldorf after 38 years of honorable service to NBC …. He’s gonna rip off the clip-on mike for good soon and put on his rubber fly-fishing waders ( slosh ), leaving us to that bland boob, Brian Williams – sob ! Your honorary chairs: super-evolved, sensitive couple Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue (he hosted a talk show once, she gave the world the touchy-feely 1970’s anthem collection Free to Be … You and Me ). Downtown, meanwhile, actress Meryl Streep and her cheekbones and her undeniable but sort of tedious talent show up for the opening night of a play she produced, Bridge and Tunnel , by playwright/actress Sarah Jones . The plot: Fourteen characters “travel the roads of assimilation” to tell the story of American change in an ever-changing America. “A whole bunch of different characters are going to converge on 45 Bleecker and wreak havoc for an hour and a half-that’s the best way to put it,” said Ms. Jones. Turns out this entire bunch of characters is gonna be played by … Ms. Jones! “It’s a lonely cast party,” she said. “I’m not in my writer’s head, I’m not in my actor’s head. I really make an effort to sort of zone into eight other people’s heads and let them do all the work.” In earlier eras, we believe this was referred to as “multiple-personality disorder.”

[Tom Brokaw salute, Grand Ballroom, the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel, 301 Park Avenue, by invitation only; Bridge and Tunnel , 45 Bleecker Street Theatre, 7 p.m., 212-307-4100.]

Friday 20th

Chomskying at the bit: Spitfire academic Noam Chomsky gets “the treatment,” such as it is, in N.Y.U. instructor Noel Salzman’s play The Loneliness of Noam Chomsky (Performance) . The lucky linguist will be portrayed by Aya Ogawa , 29, a programming assistant at the Japan Society by day-and a woman . Odd. “The amount of information in the man’s brain is astounding and amazing!” said Ms. Ogawa, whose previous bizarre acting credits include J. Robert Oppenheimer. “He just takes the facts of what has happened and reveals how those facts have been distorted by the media or hidden from the public. To read him is just a process of unveiling facts.” She then admitted that the best part of the role is “the glasses.”

[Chashama Theater, 113 West 42nd Street, 7 and 9 p.m., 212-592-4644.]

Saturday 21st

Film wonks! Only a week or so till the Oscars, and our bushy-haired, bushy-tailed “showbiz” correspondent is dusting off his spats, formulating the tough questions …. Tonight, there’s a screening of the animated and live-action short films -that’s right, the ones nobody actually bothers to see, except pallid N.Y.U. cultural-theory grad students with bountiful trust funds and house accounts at the Angelika. The event is hosted by Robert Osborne , who’ll sign his handy reference work 75 Years of Oscar after the show and is part of some “Monday Nights with Oscar” series-wait a sec, isn’t it Saturday tonight? What the bleep? In other hot news, The New Yorker quietly, discreetly celebrates its 79th anniversary today; editor David Remnick is girding his loins for the imminent plop of former New York Times “cultural czar” and all-around boy genius Adam Moss upon New York magazine in nine short days. Meanwhile, the anxious tippety-tap of freelancers freshening up their résumés can be heard across the city …. By the by, whatever happened to Radar ?

[“Monday Nights with Oscar,” Academy Theater at the Lighthouse, 111 East 59th Street between Park and Lexington, 2 p.m., 888-778-7575.]

Sunday 22nd

Break out the Birkenstocks, socks and lox: A bunch of lefties, like Princeton prof Cornel West and Ian Williams , who wrote The U.N. for Beginners , are gathering for the last day of “Life After Bush,” a three-day conference about workers’ rights, racism and LGBTQ activism, whatever that may be …. Meanwhile, uptown, one of Ernest Hemingway’s many grandkids -a 36-year-old guy called Sean -is lecturing on Poppa’s life and plugging a compilation of his work called Hemingway on War , then joining in a “buffet brunch” and an “informal conversation.” Our own “informal conversation” with young Mr. Hemingway was something of a bust: He called from Carroll Gardens (that’s Brooklyn) and confided he’d recently gone hunting ( “mostly geese and ducks” ) and fishing ( “trout … on the Missouri River” ), and that was about it.

[“Life After Bush: Youth Activism and the Fight for Our Future,” CUNY Graduate Center, 365 Fifth Avenue, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., 212-727-8610; Sean Hemingway on Ernest Hemingway, 92nd Street Y, 92nd Street and Lexington Avenue, 11 a.m., 212-415-5500.]

Monday 23rd

Smug rocker couple! Dweezil Zappa (Frank was his father) and Lisa Loeb (had, like, one hit song sometime back in the 1990’s) are still shacking up together, and they called from a hotel in Chicago to discuss their new show on the Food Network, Dweezil and Lisa -think Dinner and a Movie , except no movie. “It’s about how the food fits into our lives,” said Mr. Zappa, 34, one of whose sisters is named Diva Muffin. “It’s not like a musical film where suddenly there’s a song about tomato sauce.” “We’re just completely obsessed with food!” added Ms. Loeb, a neither-here-nor-there 35. Tonight, the duo plays the Bowery Ballroom-bring pies, hurl them. Or you can go hear two Tonys, Bennett and Randall , belt tunes from Guys and Dolls -only thing is, it costs at least $1,000 (oh, Adelaide!) … but it does benefit a worthy cause, the Iris Cantor Women’s Health Center. Option C: The View ‘s Meredith Vieira (the one who’s not old, fat nor formerly fat) M.C.’s Rodale’s “Books for a Better Life” awards. Suze Orman (Oprah’s finance guru) and Karen Duffy (Revlon spokesbeauty) will honor Dr. Wayne Dyer, author of It’s Never Crowded Along the Extra Mile . (Heck, it’s even less crowded at home under the covers.)

[Lisa Loeb and Dweezil Zappa, Bowery Ballroom, 6 Delancy Street, 866-468-7619; “Books for a Better Life” awards, Millennium Broadway Hotel, 145 West 44th Street, 6 to 8 p.m., 212-463-7787; Guys and Dolls benefit, Imperial Ballroom, Sheraton New York Hotel, 811 Seventh Avenue, 7 to 10 p.m., 212-821-0560.]

Another babe authoress! We found 22-year-old Cecilia Ahern at home in Dublin, resting from a whirlwind tour for her debut novel, P.S. I Love You . The plot: After her husband dies of brain cancer at 30, Holly is surprised to find that he has left her a letter for each month of the year containing a list of things to do to overcome her grief. “It was really an idea that just jumped into my head when I was daydreaming one day,” said Ms. Ahern, a pretty colleen who just happens to be the daughter of the prime minister of Ireland, and apparently quite a manic talent. “I started at 10 p.m. and went till 7 in the morning. I’d sleep till 3 in the afternoon and then start all over again. I just work much better at night. My brain works much better, and there are no interruptions because no one’s ringing.” Who would she like to star in the movie version? “I really, really wouldn’t mind anyone who’s good at acting. I think Jennifer Aniston would make a great Holly, and I like Gwyneth , too.” Brace yourself: The kid’s already written a second book. It took four months. What’s it about? “I wish I could tell you, but I can’t.” Begorrah !

[ P.S. I Love You reading, Barnes and Noble, 2289 Broadway, 7:30 p.m., 212-362-8835.]

Tuesday 24th

Fashion Week backwash continues as designer and noble soul Kenneth Cole -who we think is married to a Cuomo or something-fills his store windows with articles of clothing donated by Sharon Stone (actress), Lance Bass (spacey Backstreet Boy) and Oscar de la Hoya (the hottest boxer on the planet; not to be confused with designer Oscar de la Renta, who we must say charmed the pants off us a couple of weeks ago!). Are the donated garments, well, quite fresh? “Um, I assume they’re all washed,” said Mr. Cole (the same!) from the fancy part of Florida. “But they’re also all signed, so … I would imagine that they’re all sanitary, if that’s your concern. But if there’s anything that appears anything less than sanitary and sterile, we will, in fact, make sure it is such before we deliver it.” Phew!

[Kenneth Cole/Help U.S.A. auction, Kenneth Cole at Rockefeller Center, www.kennethcole.com for more information.]

Wednesday 25th

“It’s a great way to live,” said erstwhile Daily News editor Pete Hamill from Cuernavaca, Mexico, where he lives when he’s in hard-boiled “writer” mode. “I always say, ‘Between the vowels of Mexico and the consonants of New York, I might get a decent sentence out of myself,'” Mr. Hamill said modestly over the click of castanets and the swish of petticoats. “I can do all the reporting in New York and then hole up and … just write! My friends, the Knicks fans, don’t call me up after every goddamn game!” Mr. Hamill’s finishing up a book about downtown Manhattan, but today he’ll fly in to join Norman Mailer and Arthur Schlesinger Jr. in fêting the centennial of James T. Farrell , author of the classic Chicago tome Studs Lonigan . And speaking of studs, you’ll find your share of Buddhist beefcake at the Tibet House ‘s party for the New Year (it’s the Year of the Wood Monkey -which sounds silly, but it’s better than astrology), with performances by David Byrne (Talking Head), Ray Davies (bluegrass) and “serious” composer Philip Glass, who spoke to us of his love for the Dalai Lama. “You might say, ‘I wish I had been alive to meet Gandhi, or I wish I’d been alive to meet Abraham Lincoln,’ or someone like that,” said Mr. Glass, with fervor. “Well, here’s a guy who’s around now . And he’s not as close as you’re gonna get-he’s what you got.” That’s nice, dude, but is Uma coming?

[James T. Farrell Centennial Celebration, Celeste Bartos Forum at the Humanities and Social Sciences Library, Fifth Avenue and 42nd Street, 6:30 p.m., 212-930-0855; Tibet House Benefit Concert, Carnegie Hall, 881 Seventh Avenue, 7:30 p.m., 212-247-7800.] Eight Day Week