To the Editor:

If George Gurley doesn’t know whether he “love” loves his girlfriend Hilly after three-plus years, for God’s sake, he should quit wasting her time [“Should I Get Married? My Hilly Joining Me in Couples Session,” Aug. 8]. Moreover, if he thinks of his relationship with someone as adversarial—ball-crushing, even—he should quit wasting her time. They should have a state-of-the-relationship talk and make sure they’re on the same page and following the same story. Yes, it’s hard to articulate—but try, because it’s a damn sight better than wallowing in lukewarm waters. I’ve just saved you thousands of dollars in couples-therapy bills right there (maybe some extended-remix heartbreak as well).

My pet theory about male-female relationships is that men think there’s something better out there, while women think there’s nothing else out there. The truth, of course, lies somewhere in between.

Jennifer Way


Area of Study

To the Editor:

Jason Horowitz’s Aug. 1 article, “N.Y.U. War Games: Academics Cram for a Disaster,” states that N.Y.U. has conducted studies on ethnic communities’ responses to government messages. This is incorrect.

The research team has reviewed previously published research on public health and terrorism, including Dr. Roz Lasker’s September 2004 study for the New York Academy of Medicine, entitled “Redefining Readiness,” as part of our research for the federal government on large-scale mass-casualty events.

Lewis R. Goldfrank, M.D.

Principal Investigator,

Large-Scale Emergency Readiness Project

Chairman and Professor,

Department of Emergency Medicine

N.Y.U. School of Medicine


You Understand Me

To the Editor:

I’d like to thank Michael Janeway for his review of my book, My Father the Spy: An Investigative Memoir [“The Murk of Vietnam in 1963, and a Family Romance, Too,” Aug. 1]. Of course I was pleased by the praise, but I also felt that Mr. Janeway really studied the book and presented its various threads and issues beautifully—a job so many reviewers neglect. I will always be grateful for that. It’s a lovely thing to be taken seriously, lovelier still to be understood.

John Richardson

Katonah, N.Y. Letters