East Hampton explodes: Sorry, we’re exaggerating. Here’s the deal: Despair flooded the hearts of many rich residents of East Hampton this summer when town officials canceled their Fourth of July fireworks over concerns that the explosions would disrupt the nesting habits of the endangered Piping Plover. According to a village employee, the migratory birds have been occupying Main Beach for the past couple years during the summer. But they have flown the coop, headed to parts unknown (we suspect Long Beach Island). Let’s blow this sky up! thought officials. At tonight’s fireworks-fest, expect annoying private school kids running like hooligans in seersucker short pants, minded by headbanded matrons carrying weird picnic baskets in primary colors. Anyone else miss George Plimpton?
[East Hampton 4th of July Fireworks, Main Beach, East Hampton, 8 p.m.]