Secularists, you can run, but you can’t hide: Barney’s rolls out the holiday windows and we called our own Simon Doonan for the scoop, having heard that his proposed Hitchcock theme had been squelched in favor of “Have a Green Holiday” (but first, buy some chinchilla!). “I always think Hitchcock is so chic, but my boss thought there was something distinctly unfestive about a man wearing his mother’s dress coming at you in the shower with a sharp knife,” said Mr. Doonan. However: “We’re actually one of the few stores that installs without curtains, so the real delight of next week is that you get to see window dressers hurling glue guns and staplers at each other! It’s like watching animals at the zoo.” (Wait, we got stuck on glue gun. They still make those?) After his hard work is finished, Mr. Doonan said, “That’s a great time for we window dressers to rush off and have a face-lift!” Moving on to more unpleasant reminders of the fleeting nature of everything: A memorial exhibit of new media artist Jeremy Blake’s work is staged by his former gallerists at Kinz, Tillou + Feigen. (The 35-year-old Blake committed suicide off Rockaway Beach a week following his girlfriend’s suicide last summer.) The artist had yet to complete the film he was working on with Malcolm McLaren, but part of it will be shown here. After this, we may need a stiff drink: Yo La Tengo at the Music Hall of Williamsburg, anyone? (Drunk, we’ve decided, is the only way to see Williamsburg.) Or there’s always the Food Network’s “Sweet,” billed as “New York City’s Largest Dessert Party Ever,” a great place to swim naked through Chocolate Fondant and an Avocado Anglaise by Buddakan’s Daniel Skurnick in an effort to end childhood hunger. Rachel Ray, Cat Cora and Lorraine Bracco are involved, and—wait, Mrs. Billy Joel!, who will be making “Wedding Biscotti.” Wedding wha? We called her up. “Around the turn of the century everybody in their weddings would use rosemary—they’d put it in the flower arrangements or the man’s boutonniere, because it symbolized remembrance,” Katie Lee Joel said. “And I wanted to include it in my wedding [3 years ago], and I thought, ‘Hmmm, can I put it in some sort of food?’ And I came up with the idea of biscotti!” Ms. Lee Joel, hard at work on a cookbook to be released in the spring, intimated that she knows how to take care of her man: “He loves a pot roast,” she said. “He’s on tour right now, and when he comes home from a tour the first thing he wants is a pot roast. So I like to have one in the oven so he can smell it when he comes in the door. And he loves my meatloaf.” Well, he is the piano man.
[Barney’s New York, 660 Madison Avenue; Jeremy Blake Memorial Exhibition, Kinz, Tillou + Feigen, 529 West 20th Street, 212-929-0065; Yo La Tengo at Music Hall of Williamsburg, 8 p.m., www.ticketmaster.com; SWEET, Presented by Ferrero Rocher, Waterfront, 269 11th Avenue, www.nycwineandfoodfestival.com]