Sheryl Crow, eyes rolling, apparently scoffed at mention of ex-beaux Lance Armstrong’s Ashley-Olsen antics; Tory Burch, on the other hand, doesn’t care. [Page Six]
Ethiopian woman claims to be the mother of Zahara Jolie-Pitt, and she wants to “be with her.” [Rush & Malloy: 2nd item]
Donald Trump, Jr., has filed a lawsuit against members of his condo board, which ousted him last year, ensuring lots of awkwardness in the lobby. [Page Six]
Carla Katz, New Jersey Governor Jon Corzine’s ex-girlfriend, showed up to a benefit with a “hot” former model on her arm. [Page Six]
Playwright Noel Coward delivered sassy jabs in his private letters. [Rush & Malloy: 2nd item]
Fabio was spotted bragging about his George Clooney run-in to a group of middle-aged men at an L.A. Equinox. [Page Six]
New book reveals how poet Allen Ginsberg once asked Aldous Huxley where William S. Burroughs could score some acid. [Page Six]
Musician Alicia Keys didn’t enter nightclub Pacha, where her album release party was being held, because it was “a mess,” her manager says. [Page Six]
Matthew Broderick rides the subway, gets recognized! [Page Six]
A 75-year-old chimpanzee named Cheeta has just signed a deal with publisher Ecco to write a memoir. Okay! [Page Six]
In a new sex book, author Mitchell Simons reveals that Clint Eastwood, David Duchovny, Bruce Willis and Jerry Hall all lost their V-cards at 14. Sean Connery, on the other hand, was eight when he first had sex. [Page Six]
Heather Mills’ “wacky new publicist” keeps a blog, where she posts weekly video rants and “poses” with her lapdog, Bijou. [Page Six]
Sienna Miller, Tiki Barber, Eve and Jamie Burke’s Bloody Social will have to make new plans tonight, since scheduled opening of nightclub Torch has been postponed due to potty problems. [Page Six]